Deep Regression

I Have To Choose?

Chapter Playlist: Teenagers by: Black Parade, Rap God by: Eminem, and Breathe Again by Sara Barellis
LISTEN TO THEM IN ORDER!!!
Peter's positioning the ice pack behind his back on the other side of the couch. He's really just a big goof, a fucking little shit. I can't help but feel something I've never been one to say, again a cliche word.
He grunts softly sometimes while he's moving about. It's really kind of funny to watch, but annoying that he's moving the couch so much.
"PLEASE, Just...get situated."
I turn my eyes back to the boxing match on TV. His chuckle interrupts my concentration and I turn back to his eyes.
"Fine, I'm good, nice and situated." His voice amused.
"Good."
I turn up the TV a little and watch as the math begins. I'm rooting for the professional, not the underdog.
I feel the slight touch on my foot and I know whose it is, Peter.
"Peter-"
"Hmm, Darling?" He says in a really old 1980's accent.
I laugh slightly to myself and roll my eyes, he's so...so...I can't describe it at all.
"Never mind." I shake my head and continue to watch.
The underdog's fist lands into the pro's face and then a kick. Another couple of hits from the Pro and- His hand starts traveling further up.
"Peter come on."
I turn to him and see the unmistakeable smile on his lips. Fricken Peter.
"What? I'm not doing anything...yet."
His hand goes higher up my calf and is halfway to my knee. If he goes any higher, I'm going to pull my legs underneath me.
"Please! I'm watching the match!"
The underdog smacks the Pro down when suddenly he's knocked out from underneath him.
"I can see that, but I really just want to relax."
"And that's your way of relaxing?" I raise an eyebrow.
"Mhm, best way ever!" He kids back.
His hand goes even higher and he's practically off the couch with his back.
"You must be feeling better." I mumble as I continue with my show.
Then Peter lifts the pant leg and I feel his soft lips kissing my skin. I shiver under his touch and pull my legs underneath me.
He chuckles again and comes closer to me. I don't even want to give him my attention right now. I need to know how this fight ends!!
"Selena-"
"Shh, the pro has him on the ropes!"
"Hone-"
"No pet names."
"Fine, boss-"
"HES GOING TO WIN!! Yes! Yes! Yes!"
I stand up from my seat and the Pro throws the underdog down! YES!
"Yay, Your fighter won!" Peter says in a mocking voice.
"Yes he did!"
"Selena." The seriousness in his voice calling to me.
"Peter?"
"Please, sit down."
"Okay."
I sit down in my seat, only it has grown smaller. I lean back into Peter's chest and feel his hands wrap around my waist.
"Peter, I-"
"Did you mean what you said earlier?" He asks.
"Earlier?"
"No running, no turning back." He whispers.
"Why?"
"You've been...distant, since I kissed you again."
"Peter-"
"The truth, Selena."
Peter wants the truth, great. I suck at the truth, I always will.
"I-Peter, you have to understand that there's-"
"Things you can't tell me, I already know that, but I just want to know how you feel about-"
"Peter-"
"No, Selena, please just tell me."
"Peter." I sterner.
"What are you hiding?"
"PETER." I clench my teeth.
He just stares into my eyes. I reach out and touch his hand.
"Selena, I thought there was no running away." He whispers to me.
"Peter, I can't tell you it!"
"Why not?" His voice is calm while mine climbs.
"BECAUSE."
"Why?"
"BECAUSE I BLAME MYSELF FOR THEIR DEATHS!" I scream out as the door suddenly opens.
Peter's eyes never leave me, but I turn around and see Kevin.
His eye swollen pink and purple, and he looks about as pissed as I was earlier.
"Kevin?"
"This is Kevin?" Peter's voice angry suddenly.
"Darling, get in my car downstairs, now!" His voice earthshaking.
"Kevin, your not going to get me back."
"Get in my fucking, NOW!" He yells at me.
I shake as I get up off the couch and stand with clenched fists.
"No."
"Don't make me do something I'm capable of."
His eyes dart to Peter on the couch.
"You wouldn't dare."
"Kevin, I think I remember you..." Peter gets off the couch and goes off to the other side of the coffee table.
"Peter, Don't." I command him.
Kevin watches his moves carefully and stands in front of me, protectively.
"Huh, So this is the guy I'm supposed to be afraid of, your boyfriend." Kevin turns to me and smirks.
I glare at him and watch Peter's expression from the corner of my eye. His eyes soften and look kind of relieved that I said that.
"Yes, I'm the guy your supposed to think of in your nightmares, your days in the dark, and when you think of her."
Peter takes a step to Kevin and I feel Kevin's rough grip on my shirt.
"Very cute threat, but I've got news."
"Peter?"
His eyes go to me behind Kevin and I point to his hand on my shirt. Peter doesn't look alert, just concerned.
"So, Peter, did you know that earlier today we were in bed..."
Kevin pulls me in front of him and holds my back against his chest. I feel his face in the crook of my neck and I don't move an inch.
"Mmm, she still smells good, and you know what-"
"Kevin, let go." I order him as I slowly begin to try and think of ways out of this.
"Peter I'm sure you can guess what I did to her this afternoon, after your jog."
"Kevin stop!" I yell at him.
He puts his lips to my neck and kisses it lightly. I feel almost slimy and disgusted by it. My eyes look over at Peter whose steaming! I think he can see that I don't want this anymore.
Kevin's hands travel to places that aren't his anymore on my body.
"Do you know what she says while-"
"Stop!" I sternly defy him.
"Take your hands-"
"She says MY name, Mine."
"Peter, Kevin was only a one nighter person." I confess.
Peter's eyes don't seem to see me anymore, just Kevin touching me.
"She's good and ready now." Kevin Laughs in my ear.
I bring my foot down on his feet and then everything goes blank.
Peter's on top of Kevin on the couch, and the two of them are duking it out.
"KEVIN! Stop it!" I yell.
They continue and Kevin's feeding Peter bullshit about us.
"You know what she loves-"
"Shut up!" Peter hits him again and again.
"When you get rough."
"Peter stop, please." I beg.
"Ya, Peter Get off me so I can get on her."
Peter stops and slowly gets off Kevin, while wiping his bloody lip.
"Your not worth it." He spits at Kevin.
Peter walks over to me and I just want to help bandage his wounds.
"Peter-"
"Save it."
He's anger goes off on me and brushes past me. Ouch, that hurt.
"He's not worth it Selena, you know, you know, that I and I alone can give you what you need." Kevin is now trying to convince me.
I turn back to Peter pouring a glass of alcohol. He tosses it back and pours another.
I turn my eyes to Kevin and see his black eye, his bloody nose, and his bloody forehead.
He grabs my hand and goes down on one knee. I'm in total shock and I know that this is where I make my decision. This is where I pick what I need and what I want.
"Please, Selena, come home with me. Have sex all the time, and bury your past with me. Marry me Selena." He begs.
Marry him? We've known each other for a long time, over five years.
I hear the glass cup hit the table painfully forced, and my eyes automatically flutter over to Peter. He's staring at me in this situation and has an frustration about him. My eyes go back down to Kevin.
"Please, Selena, be my wife!" Kevin begs again.
"Kevin, Your a lot of things good and bad, but there's one thing you certainly are."
His hopes reach the top heighth, and this is exactly what I need.
I turn my eyes back to Peter whose watching me with a pain in his eyes.
"Your exactly what I need."
"So you'll marry me?" Kevin's smile probably there.
Peter's is gone and he looks like he just died a little.
"Your what I need, but I want Peter. I want him more than I need you. I want him wholly and entirely. I want you Peter. How's that for Honest?"
He looks like he's in shock. I'm in shock too, I can't believe I just let it all slip out of my mouth.
"I-" My voice slips out into breaths.
"Selena, your joking." Kevin contradicts.
Me and Peter are still staring at each other.
"I-I'm..." I don't know what my sentence was, and it's scary.
I tears pool in my eyes and Peter doesn't seem to be breathing.
Then I feel a hand on my arm and I'm pulled out of our little cliche moment.