bound to him (Rose&Dimitri)

Chapter 12

I walked off to the lunch line ignoring the stares from everyone.  I looked away from Dimitri.  Why did he have to so sexy God like?  "Roza, please!  I'm begging you.  Come back to me.  I miss you.  I... I love you."  I looked up at him and held back the tears at the edge of my eyes.

"You love me?  You love such a monster?  I can't be loved and I never want to hear you say you love me again.  Do you know what I wanted to do to you?  I wanted to drink you dry and turn you, just so I could have you to myself.  I was willing to change you into the monsters of your dreams just so I could be selfish.  You don't deserve me, just go find Tasha.  I'm sure she still wants you, more than me."  I turned me back to him grabbing an apple.

"The monsters of my dreams?"  He chuckled at this.  What the hell?  This boy was something else.  "I mean they can be considered monsters but Roza the only thing in my dreams is a beautiful girl.  You.  I dream about you every night.  I don't care that you wanted to do that to me.  I don't care.  Please I love you, I want to be with you."  I let a single tear fall and turned to him again.

"You want to be with me?  Dimitri let me tell you something that every teenager knows.  A teacher student relationship never works.  There is always complications, and me being strigoi once is one of the complications.  You may have forgiven me but I haven't forgiven myself.  I hate the dark things I wanted to do to both you and Lissa.  I'm a monster and you can't change that Dimitri.  Nobody can change that, not even Adrian who tried to help me last night, no because after what happened between us I fucking remembered what I wanted to do.  But you want to know what I'm going to do?  I'm going to but on a smile and ignore the whispers and laughs that come from behind my back, ignore the fact that my teachers make it their personal goal to point me out in the middle of class, and most of all I'm going to make you stop loving me.  I stopped loving you a long time ago."  I walked away from him and back to Lissa and Adrian.  Christian had joined them and looked happy to see me.  I sat down and snuggled into Adrian's awaiting arms. 

Lissa looked more shocked then I did and I laughed at her.  "Um when did you two become and item?"  I looked at Adrian who was staring at me.

"Last night actually.  If it wasn't for Adrian I don't think I would be feeling this good."  I said smiling and caught a glance as Dimitri.  He looked like someone had torn his heart out and stomped on it.  I looked back at Lissa who hadn't noticed and smiled my fake smile.  They all thought I was doing okay but only one person knew how I was really feeling and I had just broke his heart and had no chance of ever repairing it.

"So Rose what do you think about that?"  I blinked twice and looked confused.

"Sorry what was the question?"  I asked, looking a little taken aback.

"I wanted to go on a shopping trip this weekend and was wondering if you wanted to come."  I smiled at Lissa knowing I would never be able to go.

"Yeah that sounds great.  But Lissa I can't.  Headmistresses is already letting a lot happen with the whole strigoi thing and she doesn't trust me at the moment."  I faked a smile as she looked kind of sad and Christian promised her he would go.  He looked at me pleadingly.  He must have really missed me.  I laughed to myself and got up.  "I'm going to head straight to class okay?  I need to talk to my instructor."  I ran out and to my history class.

"Ah Miss Hathaway you grant me with your presence."  I walked down to him and looked him in the eyes.

"Let me tell you something, just because I was once strigoi does not give you free reign to ask me every question about them.  All you are doing is pointing me out for more nonsense.  Now let me tell you something, if this you have happened to you I would never have teased you.  I would have tried to figure out how the hell it happened rather then pointing you out 24/7.  Now if you do it again I don't care whether or not you are my instructor I will fucking kick your ass.  Do you understand me?"  I looked at him and he nodded.  I walked back to my seat and waited for the bell to ring.  No fucking way for was I going to let anybody walk over me anymore.  That just isn't Rose Hathaway.