Zindagi Gulzar hai - Life is a Flower Garden

17 October - Zaroon

Today was Taimoor's first birthday and I feel as if he's all grown up. But that's not true because he's still so tiny. Sometimes I think how surprising it is that time flies by and you don't even realize it. It feels just like yesterday when he came into this world and its already been a year. The most beautiful year of my life. I was never really interested in kids but somehow there is so much love in me for my own son.  I like everything about him. His cries, his laughter, his voice, everything.

These two years have taught me what a home means because I thought that all it meant was status and money. I know now that love and understanding is more important. My parents loved me a lot but they never had time for me, only money. And I, instead of sitting alone at home, spent my time with friends. I used to have girlfriends and I thought that was life. But now I want to give all my time except office, to Kashaf and Taimoor. I want my son to know that his parents love him and that he is the most important thing for them. Then when he will grow up he will not wander the streets like me because he will know that someone waits for him at home, someone who cares for him a lot. 

If I had married someone from my society then maybe I would still be spending most of my time out outside home but thankfully I did not. There was need of a home in my life and Kashaf filled that absence. If I hadn't married her then maybe I wouldn't be this happy, and this content today. She was the only one who turned my house into a real home. Since I became a parent, I have liked my parents more. Even they have a lot of faults, I love them more than ever now because they are my parents. They gave me so much and even though they left out on some things, I haven't fulfilled many of my responsibilities too.  

Today was a good day. I want to spend the rest of my life like this, with little moments of happiness to help me along the way, and without any pain.