Serenity [h.s]

Enervation

- I should do whatever will make you feel secure.

"I wish I knew how to quit you." - Broke Back Mountain

Summer Lowal

In the worst case, I've laid in bed all morning, not getting up once. Not even to piss. I held it in. Carter stayed the night and stayed by my side, trying to make me feel better because I was a jealous bitch with a ego the size of my father's feet which are pretty huge. I'd never admit I was jealous, nor that I liked the devil himself, Harry.

"C'mon, Mar. Get up, we need to do something to get you out of that funk," I groan and bury my face into the pillow further flipping him off.

"Suck a cock."

"You know if I could I would, but since I can't, you're going to need to get up," I through my pillow at Carter and then he huffed.

After minutes I thought that I've won, no - I didn't. Because in two seconds, I felt a pair of hands on my ankles pulling me up from the pillow that was laid on top of my head, the sunlight shooting rays at my eyes.

"Fuck you, Carter, and fuck you Sun," I huffed and moved the hair out of my face and looking at a tired but semi amused gay boy.

I shake my head with a defecate sigh. "What do you want Carter?" I bellow loudly. He steps in front of me and takes my hands.

"Get out of bed, honey, this isn't healthy,"

"Yeah, Harry isn't healthy and I still hang around him.. at least I did." Maybe he could get someone else to do his paintings.

"No, love. You think he's unhealthy for you. It's all in that head of yours." His finger taps on the side of my head and push it away, standing up and brushing past him. I walk to the kitchen and make a cup of coffee.

"I don't want to continue the painting anymore," fuck the money. I can make it and donate it for charity like I always do.

"Yes you do."

"No, okay? I can't continue being around him. I already like him and hate him at the same time. It's not making any sense and I need a good fuck,"

"Let him do that," I glare towards him, tempted to throw the hot cup at his flawless face.

I opened my mouth to speak but there was a loud banging coming from the door and voice behind it. "Summer! Summer,  answer the door,"

And more bangs.

Fuck he's not gonna rest.

I whisper to Carter to get it and not mention I'm home.

"Hello, Styles," Carter chimes, hand resting on the door.

"Is Summer here?" He asks breathlessly.

"No, she went out." He lies, casually.

I rest the mug on the counter and it makes a clinking sound.

Fuck me fuck me fuck me fuck me fuck me.

"What was that?" Harry asks, his voice louder.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.

"Uh- er the dog," Carter stutters over his words and I know I'm fucked so I just walk up behind him and push Carter out of sight.

Harry's shoulders slump and he sighs, forest green eyes straining on me with worry.

"What do you want?" My voice was powered and he was taken back.

He reaches out for me but I put up my hand, stepping back. "Don't. We have nothing going on for you to comfort me. What do you want? I'm not going to ask again," he sighs.

"Summer, I'm sorry if I upset you in any way, I wanted to check on you, are you coming to the-"

"No." I cut him off. "I'm not. I will stop from here and you can ask someone else to do a portrait for you,"

"What the bloody hell, no! I want you to continue it,"

"Ask Sandra maybe she can," I snicker and his forest green eyes turn into slits, biting on his plump lip.

"You're jealous?" I narrow my eyes.

"No, fucking Harry, I'm not jealous. I just don't appreciate you telling me to leave while I was doing my painting, and then go home and fuck the assistant. It's very immature." I hear Carter snort but I shoot him a glare.

Okay, so I'm jealous. Big woop.

"Summer.. I - I don't know what to say, you've, you've just.. " he trails off and lets out a breath, running his hand through his hair. I took notice of his outfit, printed blue jacket with a black tee and black pants and brown boots.

"Exactly, you can leave,"

"I'm not leaving," he states, eyebrows furrowed. He steps forward and captures my wrists in his hold. The skin burns from his flesh and I can't help but swallow hard.

I can't believe I like you.

"Please, Harry. If you have any decent bone left in you, leave me be."

His eyes hold hurt but acceptance and nods with a frown. His hold was released but he lowers his head, lips on my forehead, kissing softly. Mumbling lowly to me, he says, "I'm going to make things right. I promise you." He pulls back, his minty smell slowly fading as he takes one last look at me with those forest green eyes, entering the lift and leaving me.

My heart.. kinda dropped, or cracked a bit and I didn't know why.

I don't know why I met him. I don't know why I like him. I don't know why I hate him, and as I close the door, tears flow out of my eyes and Carter was already there to hold me and assure things were going to be alright.

"If you give him that part of you, things will be okay," he mumbles into my hair. My tears soak up his white tee and I don't know what's wrong with me.

"What part? The fucked up part of me that doesn't let anyone in, and trust?" My voice cracked and I was here once again crying over a fucking man. Except this time I felt like I've lost something.

I felt empty.

Stop bloody crying!

"You trust me, Summer. Why don't you trust him?" I just shrug my shoulders and let out a few more breaths of uncertainty and hug him tighter.

"Maybe.. m - maybe I trust him. But maybe I also don't want to."

-

Harry Styles

I'm a fucking bloody mess. I need to get my shit straight. I can't keep doing this. But I can't simply just let her go. She's.. literally the reason I want to get up in the morning to the God awful job. I only do it so I can see her. I'm reminded that there's a purpose in everything. I need to get my shit straight. I really do.

Asking Sandra to sleep with me wasn't a wise decision. It wasn't. And I wasn't even thinking at the time, because all I could think of was Summer and how she hated me and how her ocean blue eyes burnt into mine. All I could think about was the way her skin reacted to the touch of mine.. and how my heart plummeted in my chest just of her presence and how my feelings for her have sky rocketed and how she drives me mad but I don't mind because.. she's put this serenity into my life even though she drives me mad.

She drives me mad, but it's worth it all.

-

Double short update!
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Now on further notices, the guys did it again and the dmd mv was indeed odd but fucking amazing kfmdidnsk ok ily and thank you for reading x

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