Serenity [h.s]

Apologies

-I know you're gonna fuck me up, fuck me up one day.

I love you.

Summer Lowal

The past few days have been horrendous. Harry has been calling me non-stop; always coming by my house, and of course I'd never answer. The other night he was so close to breaking down my door just to come inside to see if I was alive. Or just to see me. My heart would jump and clench inside my chest at the sound of his voice. God have I missed his voice. I missed his touch; I missed his words. I missed him so much I ached. My bones hurt, and I felt like there was a void in the middle of my heart. I don't really know why I push people away. It's just a bad awful habit really.

Carter has been trying to contact me; sending me multiple messages all the time, and I only answered one, telling him I was okay. I mean, I was. But something felt so wrong, I felt awful in everyway, as if something was weighing me down.

I just didn't know what.

Later in the day, I finally left my messy bed and decided to walk to the nearest cafe and change the atmosphere I was surrounding myself in. The weather was bloody amazing and I couldn't get enough of the way the cold air kissed my skin and the way the suns heat melted the frosts on my cheeks.

I sighed in comply as I entered the cafe; the smell of bitter coffee and butternut entering my nostrils. I smiled and took a seat in the nearby booth next to the window, watching people walk past by and cars driving by here ever so often. The waiter took my order and went back to the kitchen to whip up what I ordered.

I waited patiently, closing my eyes and enjoying the peace and quiet.

"You've been avoiding me," a low rasp made my eyes shoot open and God did this man do that on purpose.

His green eyes were pale and soft, with a hint of sadness in them. "Harry, what the bloody hell are you doing here," I was soon out of my seat, looking up at him with a glare. He only bit his lip, hand going through his long thick locks, my insides going insane at how God like he looked.

"I-I came to get my mind off of you, work on some paper work, and then I saw you sitting here," I stayed quiet as I watched his frantic eyes and hands. His plump lips were chapped and I couldn't help but notice the faint bags under his eyes. Nevertheless, he still looked more breathtaking than ever.

"I miss you, Summer." He mutters, taking a step closer. I allow it.

My arms fall to my side as I slump my shoulders, shaking my head as I avoid eye contact. "Harry.." I sigh heavily, looking into forest green eyes.

"Please, just... I don't know dammit," his voice gets an octave louder and I look around with soft and tired eyes, noticing some people have caught our attention. I look back to Harry and slowly take his hand, lacing my fingers through his. I watch the way his features change and the way his skin feels against my own; the sharp and electrifying feeling of his energy so near my own made me shiver.

I saw the hope in his mint colored eyes.

"Lets talk outside," I whispered calmly, taking him with me outside, the cool air wrapping around us, pulling our bodies close to one another. My hands were on his chest and one if his hands were holding my face gently while the other held my waist, making sure I was close to him; his forehead against mine.

"Baby why have you been pushing me away," I only inhaled sharply, the feeling of his lips brush against my own distracting me terribly.

"I.. don't know," I managed, looking up into his eyes. They were tired. Oh God they looked tired and I knew I was exhausting him, but I was selfish like that. I didn't want him to try on anyone else but me. But I knew if I kept on doing this, unfairly, he'd get so damn sick and tired of me and eventually would give up.

I had to stop this. I had to stop being so hard on him. He was the best thing that had ever happen to me. He was willing to stay when no one else would and I was pushing the one good thing away from me. I was a monster yet he wasn't scared. I was so in love with him, I didn't know who I was until he came into my life. He helped me finish the painting I was struggling with.

He was helping me with.. me.

"You were doing alright, until the night you left me," his voice cracked, and he pulled me even closer, our lips just a mere centimeter from touching and I was practically melting, my bones shaking and my veins buzzing from having him so damn close to me.

"I n-needed space," I stuttered; his nose nudging mine, eyes fluttering closed.

"You didn't need space, darling. You needed someone but you wanted to act tough,"

I nodded and clutched his sweater, locking our lips, molding them completely, the shock of how the heat between us was so intense in the matter of seconds.

"Forgive me," I whispered against his lips, his tongue snaking in and out, pulling away slightly.

"I forgave you the moment you walked away from me."

---
i hate this chapter??? lol I can't wait for the next and i'm v v sorry for the late and shot update, next one is gonna be supa hothothot

HAPPY THANKSGIVING BBIES
i'm so thankful for all of you (-:

all the love x

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