Our Little Bit of Light

I fear hope

A/N: This chapter is a bit shorter than usual but I felt like updating again today, so here it is.

Bellamy walked out of the bedroom to where everyone else was waiting for him. One by one they turned to face him.

"Alright let's go." Clarke said as if by Bellamy walking out here to them was answering Kane's question which, in truth was about to happen just not in the way they want it too.

"Actually, I'm going to stay with Murphy and we might come back to camp later." In all honesty Bellamy had no idea whether or not he would be able to convince Murphy to come back to camp but he may as well try.

"Oh." Clarke said awkwardly, realizing that she had simply assumed that Bellamy would choose them over Murphy.

"Alright, just don't take too long Bell" Octavia smiled and embraced her brother, they all took turns hugging Bellamy (Well besides from Abby and Kane) and saying their goodbyes. Leaving Bellamy and Murphy alone once again.

Murphy let his head hang down and let his tears blur his vision as he shivered, bare chested and feeling utterly broken, vulnerable as he knew he would be alone once again. The door creaked open and Bellamy stepped into the almost soundless room. Bellamy stood there his presence casting a shadow over Murphy. He knew that this time Murphy had snapped, he had been holding everything in for so long pretending not to care, not to feel, but it, his feelings, everything was rushing back now because he had a reason to feel things he has a reason to love, Bellamy was that reason, but with all these emotions he would have to be truly overwhelmed and maybe he thought he even hated Bellamy a bit for making him feel everything again, for making him feel even more exposed and helpless. But as much as Bellamy made him want to scream and punch, he knew he could never truly hate him.

Finally Murphy looked up at Bellamy. Meeting eyes, Bellamy could see how Murphy was breaking himself in two, how genuinely defeated Murphy is, the sadness and terror swirling through the deep blue of his eyes.

And as Murphy looked into his chestnut brown orbs, he could tell that Bellamy knew he was falling apart and that just made him feel so much more pathetic. He knew he should be picking himself up pretending like he didn't care but somehow when he was around Bellamy, it made him want to be more brave, fearless ,but also to express who he really was as well and considering those two things directly contradicted each other he had no idea what he should do. Just being around Bellamy made him the strongest and weakest version of himself he had ever been.

Slowly Bellamy walked forward approaching a contemplative Murphy as if he was a startled animal ready to run at any moment. Eventually Bellamy came to be standing above Murphy, the younger teen sat cross legged staring up at him equal measures of hope and fear embedded in his expression, until Bellamy sat down next to him and pulled Murphy into his lap, the fear in his face still present but the hope in his eyes a thousand times more powerful at that moment. He settled in to Bellamy's chest his face resting in the crook of Bellamy's neck, warm tears sliding down his cheeks onto Bellamy's shirt. One of Murphy's arms wrapped around Bellamy's shoulders and the other fisted desperately into the fabric of his shirt, needing closeness. Bellamy wrapped his arms so tightly around Murphy's waist, Murphy was practically crushed against him but Murphy didn't mind because Bellamy was using actions to express the words Murphy so desperately needed to hear: that he would stay.