Chapter 14: Shadows

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Legolas' PoV

My father once told me that sometimes, things do not go back to the way they were. They cannot. Change was constant, and regretting the past was something we must try not to do. The past is behind us and if we linger too long, time will eventually leave us behind. As a young elfling, I was taught to control emotions and always put mind over matter. Always put your head first for it is logical and sometimes, the heart is deceiving. Perhaps, I have lived long a life, following that exact rule of thought.

Perhaps that is why, I have lived with no regrets whatsoever. Until the day I let my heart take control. It was not supposed to happen, even with Tauriel I had been cautious. Knowing fully well how dangerous the waters were. It did not hurt less, of course. But it was easy to forget. Easy to crush and never think of again.

Turwaithiel, was another story. It was rather... unexpected with her. It happened so naturally that I had not even realized it until it was too late. I could almost laugh at the thought. An elf, caught off guard.

It was night when we had finally gotten to the other side of the mountain. It was a rather short and quiet journey save for the neighing of my horse and the occasional conversation that me and Turwaithiel had to start. Sometimes, we would be as quiet as the boy.

I found it odd, however, to find someone who did not speak. I thought, first, that he was going through grief and refused to talk but it often seems that he was more joyous than any of us. Death was not something I was accustomed to. Even Tauriel's death came as a shock to me. However, deep in my heart I know i is not gone forever. Stories of elves dying rarely reached my ears as a child and these stories often end sadly, but still full of hope.

I did not know how it felt like for the world of men. For the mortals who seem to welcome death with no fear. They think elves are fearless, yet they are the ones who jump into a battle knowing there was a possibility they would never survive it.

Turwaithiel sat near the fire. The burning embers illuminating her skin, and her bright eyes. She may have changed the way she dressed, looked and even acted, yet you could still see remnants of her old life. A life she had chose to run away from.

Her soft dark tresses were now hardened with weather and dirt, although she did not mind and proceeded to tie all her strands into one big ball on top of her head. Twisting it and pinning it everywhere. Something that elves were not accustomed to seeing or doing. It was quite human. Perhaps that golden haired maiden had influenced her.

The thought of the golden haired girl brought back many memories. Memories of war and grief of loss. By the way Turwaithiel slumped her shoulders and staring into the distance made me wonder if she held herself responsible.

I wish she did not. I wish she would not keep doing that. Frowning and trying not to cry. It pained me for I could not do anything. There were many a times that I would have the urge to just hold her, but what would she do? Would she even let me? What use was I? If I could not even release her of what haunted her.

All that light, gone in one moment. I often recall the times we had. Where her laughter was familiar as the sound of the wind. Now, there was not even a whisper of it. I stood away from the fire, like I always have. Watching her discreetly. She would do the same thing over and over. Rub her fingers together as if there was a chill to them she could not quite erase, then she would play with the necklace and run a finger across the leather bracelet on her wrist. Bleon was with the horse, he seemed to love him as much as I do. He had a knack for animals which made me wonder where he was raised.

From what I gathered through observation alone was, the girl named Lara was not immortal like us. She was human and Bleon was her little brother. They met along the road, perhaps. Lara had a way with her hands and Bleon did not speak. What an odd pair they were and yet, because of them, I had gotten to see Turwaithiel again. I crossed my arms over my chest and from where we stood, I could make out the borders of Mirkwood. I hope my father is doing better than me with all these complications. I could just see the resemblance now. We were both fools, destined to fall in love with women who had their own mindsets. Very strong ones too. The moon hung just above the dark horizon, casting a silver glow among the looming trees and open fields.

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