A Teenage Love: A Coming of Age Story

Chapter 6 - Silas Says

***mature content***

Michelle. It came on strong and it hit hard like a lightning bolt. I remember the day it started ruling me, leading my mind and moving my body. It altered my state of mind, made me behave like a functioning fiend.

Silas was preparing dinner for us again. The smell of food, the banter, the sound of disco and old school R&B made me crave what he was cooking. Intimacy. It was floating around the room like a cupid, zapping everybody with passion and excitement. The Flavor of Love was playing silently on TV. I asked Silas if he thought those women were genuine in their pursuit of love. Full of white wine and shrimp cocktail, he said, "Michelle, all I can say is love is blind, money is power and cocaine is one hell of a drug."

I let them ride that joke out as I grabbed the keys and told mom I was going to RJs to get snacks. They were one hundred percent there for the alone time and the junk food. Snacks and time meant the night went on.

I was the very last customer. All the lights were off except for the ones powered by the generator.

"What's up?" Juan said propping his mop up against the wall.

"Ryan here tonight?"

"Nah, he had some kind of emergency." Before I could drop my load of questions, he said, "Relax. Nobody died."

"I'll call you later."

"No you won't."

His brother, Rich, directed me to Terrell's house two streets over. Terrell was unfazed and emotionless as he held the door open wide. I stepped aside. He was tired. Lights were out.

"How's your mom? I'm sorry..." I whispered.

He waved me inside and led me to his room. Ryan was on the floor gripping twenty pound dumbbells. He pushed up off the floor with force. Once I was inside, Terrell reached for the doorknob closed himself out.

I went straight for his lips. He was in mid push up but he released one hand to caress my cheek then somehow found his way to a seated position with my lips attached to his. I straddled him.

"What's going on? Juan said you had an emergency."

"Mama fell in the shower. She'll be okay."

"How's Terrell?"

"His mom's sick. You know..."

I tucked my lip and bowed my head, feeling silly for asking. His light kiss on my cheek almost felt like wind. "I'm glad you came."

His thumbs rubbed my nipples through my camisole.

"I told my mom I was picking up snacks."

He bit my nipple through my shirt. His aggression made me gasp. "Mmm, what kind of snacks?" he wondered.

I looked to the ceiling for strength and gulped. "Um...just chips and stuff."

He reached under my shirt, cupping my tiny bare breasts. The flutter of his tongue made me arch my back as I exhaled a quivering sigh. He continued his pattern—flicking his tongue on the left then the right. Gently sucking, bringing the blood to the surface.

The heat. It entered through my breasts and swirled around my center. He rubbed at my shorts. I closed my eyes and rocked to his rhythm. It was intoxicating. I needed more. He began directing my breathing with the power of his hand and my gentle rocking became erratic spasms. I gasped at the heavy tremor that wracked me and the gush between my legs.

He hugged me tight and whispered in my ear. "You're so beautiful."

He wrapped my hand around his swollen member and let me get to know it. I ran my fingers from the base to the tip and watched it jerk when we separated. The tension stressed him. I teased it like a pet, made it beg for contact. Out of sheer interest, I bent over to kiss it. He sank deeper into the carpet and covered his eyes in agony. I wrapped my fist around the lower half and let the tip touch my tongue. I licked the bulb and pumped my fist up and down the shaft before checking in. "Is that okay?"

He nodded quickly so I continued. It was something Juan always wanted me to do and the thought always disgusted me. Just a week ago, my sexuality was a hidden jewel. There was always thin line between pleasure and shame as I was made to feel like a whore for enjoying his touch. I didn't feel the slightest bit of indignity as I explored him with my tongue. Even on my hands and knees, I was perfect. I licked and jerked until it pulsated and spit all over my white cami. We watched stupidly as the stain settled into the fabric.

The endorphins quickly evaporated and I was on my feet scrambling for my car keys.

"Don't leave." He held me tight, but I was no hostage.

"I have to go. My mom is going to be pissed."

"Tell her I wouldn't let you go."

I stayed for thirty more minutes even those naughty hands begged me to stay longer. Mom was fast asleep under Silas's arm when I got in. The infomercials were offering them a blender with accessories for three small payments of 29.95.

"We waited up for you," she said sleepily. "I told Silas we should get you a cell phone so you can call when you're going to be late."

That's how I knew what Silas said was true. "Love was like cocaine. It made you powerful and money made you blind."

I let Silvia braid my hair while we watched The Little Mermaid. I made the mistake of introducing her to the movie at our first slumber party. When we watched it together again, she knew all the songs and she sang them well.

"Sil, you can really sing."

"You can sing too, Michelle, if you try."

I gave it a try and sang a section of "Part of your World".

"Nope! That's too high for you. You don't have to sing just like Ariel to sound pretty. Try again."

I rearranged my vocals to Silvia's advice.

"Good job, Michelle! At first I didn't want my dad to get a new wife, but now I like it. I have a little sister, but I like having a big sister too.

I could see where her bossy attitude came from. She was big sister at her house.

"Well, your dad and my mom are just dating for now."

"Yeah, but my daddy said he dates people to see if he likes them. But I can't date because I'm only ten."

I smiled at Silas's clear paranoia. "Right."

"But you can date, Michelle, because you're sixteen."

"Mmhm."

"But I can't do everything youdo. That's what my dad said."