10 Years (Zerkaa/TBJZL) (A Sidemen Story)

Chapter 6 - Despair

*Josh's POV*

I can't believe it, what has just happened? It can't really be comprehended, one of the kindest and calmest people I've known, one of my best friends, has just gone insane and been totally unreasonable to me, I don't want to see him for a fucking long time, I'm pissed off.

I storm back into the house, my feelings of anger still obvious and evident. When it comes to being angry, I'm not subtle about it, I let people know, a flaw I know but it can't be helped and besides I hardly ever get upset, but this is just too much. I come back to find Vikk, Ethan and Simon round the little island in the house chatting away. They see me come in, a red mist descending in front of me and they look startled. I guess when I'm angry I can be a little intimidating.

"Josh are you ok?" asks Simon

"How did the meeting with Tobi go" asks Ethan

"Do you want to talk about it" inquires Vikk

"NO. BADLY. NO." I respond to all three questions in an overly aggressive manner, I don't meant to act towards my friends this way but I'm not in the mood to be coping with anymore shit at the moment.

"What happened?" asked Ethan worriedly

I decide that I'd better explain and get it over with otherwise it's never going to go away. "Well Tobi er... revealed he had um... feelings for... me." All of them stared at me agog, mouths wide open. "I said that it couldn't really work as I don't think I really feel the same. I wasn't angry about his feelings for me, I was even a bit flattered but the way he reacted has completely PISSED me off. I don't want to see him for a long time. He disrespected our friendship and me because he felt that I HAD to feel the same way and I tried to be civil, I promise you guys I tried but in the end I just couldn't be.

"Fuck"

"Shit"

"Bloody hell"

"Thanks for the helpful contributions guys" I replied sarcastically.

"We're sorry to hear what happened" said Vikk, I knew Vikk would be the first to respond properly, he knew how to deal with situations like this, but perhaps not of this magnitude. "But you and Tobi have been friends for so long, you'll both come through this and be stronger. You two can't not be friends, it's just not right if you're not."

"I'd like to believe you Vikk but I'm not sure that's the case, it would take a lot to repair this" I said with tears falling, I couldn't deal with this.

"It'll all be ok man" said Ethan bringing me into a hug

"We're here for you mate" said Simon with a smile

I wanted to believe them. But I didn't.

*Tobi's POV*

I can't emphasise how much pain I feel, I've lost him and it's all my fault. I didn't mean to explode like that but being rejected when I feel so strongly is something I couldn't deal with easily and I want to still be with my best friend, but I don't know if he'll want to see me anymore. I sink my head into my bed, crying my eyes out because I need to let it all out. I love him so much and I don't want to lose him. I'm not sure I can deal with all of this anymore, I don't what's going to happen to our friendship, the sidemen and our careers because of this, we can't exactly bottle this up and just carry on recording together like normal. I need to face this and sort it out.

Josh and I need to start again.