Forbidden Love (CAMREN)

thirty-four

LAURENS POV

"Mom"

She was just standing there...

After 7 years, she was just standing there

After the memories, she was just standing there

After the heartbreak she left, she was just standing there

Standing there, staring at me, almost like as if she cares.

"Lauren" she says and it felt like a piece of my heart was fixing back together, but I couldn't allow that

She made her way over to my bed with a warm smile on her face, she looked nervous, as if she was scared to approach me.

I was still in shock and my facial expression was probably hard to read, which also scared me.

I felt small arms wrap around my shoulder, but I was too nervous to hug back.

She leaned back and cupped my face with one hand and soothed the bruise that was across my eye with her thumb

"I'm so sorry" she almost whispered and that's when I came back to reality

"Get your dirty hands off me" I pushed her hands away and the heartbreak on her face was noticeable

"Lauren plea-" I cut her off

"No, you don't get to come back, you... you" I struggled to find the words

"You don't get to lay a finger on me... you don't... never touch me again" I spat at her and she took a step back

"Lauren stop" My dad moved towards me and I could see the horror in his face

"Dad... why is mom... SHE here" I growled and he took my hand in his

"Lauren, we need to talk.. all of us" He said and I leaned my head to look at her, he face was faced down, I could see the hurt in her face... more guilt than anything.

---------------------------

"So you wanted to talk... talk" I growled at both my dad and her

"Lauren, your mom just came to see you.. she heard about the accident and she came as soon as" he told me and I laughed

"What about all the other times I've been in hospital... that time I broke my arm when I was 13? huh.." I didn't give her or him time to answer

"What about the time I had that really bad throat infection when I was 15? HUH" I almost shouted

"What about that time when I was sent to hospital when I had to much alcohol  when I was 17? HUH" I shouted a little louder but still continued to not let them speak

"OR what about the time you LEFT... lets maybe start with that!" I spat and she almost flinched and so did my dad

"LAUREN STOP" he stood up and the room fell silent

"No Mike... shes right. She deserves answers" She spoke up and my body relaxed

"Lauren, if you're willing to listen to every word I speak then I'll tell you everything." She asked and I just nodded, she tried to make eye contact with me but I just couldn't

"You were 12, if you can remember... I wasn't always around in the house as much as I should have been... I was looking after my mom, she was really ill for 6 years I was her carer, but she passed away when you were only 11, it took a massive impact on me as she was the only person left in my family. My mom was my rock, even though I was probably her rock... But after she left that's when I started to drink, I wasn't a very good wife to your dad... I wasn't a very good mom to you... I wasn't rally good at anything." she exhaled and I could see her struggle to talk

"The point is... I had to get help. After everything had happened I fell into a really bad routine of drinking, at that time your father decided to call us of, he couldn't control me, no one could." hearing this made me feel really bad for her, but I needed more

" I left, I had too, I seen what I was doing to myself and I needed to fix it, no one could fix me only I could do that. I left. I got the first plane to California and I seek'ed medical help. After 4 years of help, I decided to return... I decided to come back to you. Little did I know it wasn't that easy." She sighed and made eye contact with me, I could tell she was trying to hard not to cry

"I seen you with your new family. I seen how you had both moved on and It kind of made me happy to see how happy you both were and I didn't want to disturb you're happiness Lauren" She said and a part of my heart healed back together

"I decided to get a job and a small flat just 7 miles away from here, I'd occasionally see you around in the mall shopping with friends and I'd just look at you, look at how beautiful you had became, how amazing of a person you were, but I could never say anything to you... I was terrified of destroying the life you had built for yourself" she said and reached over to hold my hand this time I allowed her

"So why are you back now?" I asked and a tear fell from my eye onto our hands that were entwined

"Because, I was the one who found you in the park, both you and Camila bleeding out struggling for breath... I called the ambulance. I stayed with you holding your hand, you probably don't remember but I had to do something I couldn't lose you... after seeing you so happy I couldn't watch your life be shattered, I'm sorry" she said and wiped away the tears that were now falling from her eyes also

"Thank you" I told her simply and my whole body relaxed

"Can I.." she asked with her arms open and I nodded

Her arms were warm around my bruised body but it felt so good. I wrapped my arms around her also and sink'ed my head into her neck, I couldn't hold it in anymore, I sobbed into her neck and she held me tighter

"Mom" I said and I could feel her nodding

"Its me baby" she said and in that moment my heart was full again.

34!

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