25|Deja Vu.

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(A/N: So i decided to update... keep in mind that i started typing this at 12 am so bear with me... ENJOY)

Music: Black Widow (by In This Moment)

***************May be triggering to some (idk)*********************************

*Ghost's POV*

         Oh no, how could this be happening again?  I tried to equate my breathing until i was at a somewhat steady pace rather than hyperventilating and sucking in oxygen but not really taking it in. 

          Maybe i was just hallucinating. Maybe this was all a figment of my imagination and i just need to calm down. But how could the blood seeping and exuding my pants be fake? I mean i knew i had an active imagination, just not this active. This was just another thing to add to my plate. First Chris fighting with Ryan, then Chris storming off and kissing Ricky telling him that he loves him, and now this! I had the worst of luck.

          "Please, not again." I said through gritted teeth, my vision contorting and blurring from tears. This wasn't the first time that i had this happen to me. All these events were all familiar to me, from the odd pain in my stomach to the blood to the tears. I tried to keep this a secret the first time though because that was a long time ago and i thought it was a one time thing.

          I haven't ever told the guys this but, i was pregnant about a year ago and then had a miscarriage about three weeks after i found out. I was traumatized. 

~~Flash back~~

        As all these stories go, I've had way too much to drink. I had decided to go out to a bar to kill my loneliness and anger that grew inside me like bamboo after i found out that Kylie had dumped me for about the third time. We were kind of at an 'on-and-off' stage in our relationship and i couldn't take it anymore. She left me alone once again, screaming "You don't love me anymore!" In my face as she slammed the door behind her. She was wrong, i do love her with all my heart, but i think that's one of my many flaws. I love too easily. And that's what leads me to getting hurt way too often. 

      So that is what brought me to this ghost town they like to call a bar. There was maybe three people here, including me. It wasn't much of a way to spend my time but at least i wasn't sulking at home. The buzz of the alcohol was slowly starting to numb my heart-broken brain, but it wasn't enough, so i gulped down five more shots until i could barely see. I knew the alcohol started to work when i didn't feel so bad about myself when i saw a couple,that were both about in their late twenties, making out. Something caught my weak attention a moment later when someone else walked into the empty bar. 

          He caught my eye immediately, i remember, because he almost looked angelic in a dark way. His hair was longish and black, but i suspected that it was dyed that color. And his face was so pale and narrow in a gorgeous way, i couldn't help but stare at him, well that and because i was very drunk. The dim lights highlighted his features so perfectly that i was almost drooling.

       "Heyyyyy." I slurred then giggled when he smiled at me. At least i could make someone happy.  "I'm Ghost..." I tried to introduce myself but ended up laughing at myself because i was hiccuping nonstop and thinking of inane things. "Whoops, i mean Devin." The guy sat down next to me on the ugly green bar stool.  In the new lighting of the bar area i could see that there was a metallic glow going from his lips where he had at least two piercings but my vision was too blurry to concentrate.

           Let's just say that the rest of the night wasn't very innocent and one thing led to another and i ended up sleeping with him. A few weeks later, i remember getting weird cravings and then i found out i was pregnant. Of course, i did so much research on guy pregnancies and just about all the websites i found said that it wasn't impossible for a guy to get pregnant but it could only happen once. So as you can imagine i was devastated when i found out that i had a miscarriage. I never even told him that he was going to be a father. I was too happy thinking about baby clothes and maybe getting back together with Kylie (though that was unlikely).

~~end flashback~~

         My mind snapped back to reality when i heard someone turn the doorknob and stepped in. I felt even worse when i saw that it was Ricky. 

         "Get out!" My voice was hoarse and rough as if i had been screaming for days and was on the verge of losing my voice. Ricky gave me a sympathetic look but didn't budge from his spot. I once again began to cry hysterically. If i had to go through this again i wanted it to be alone like the first time. 

        "Ghost, what's going on?" Ricky swiftly ran to my side as i crawled away from him. 

        "Leave me alone..." I whimpered, but he wouldn't go away.

         "Oh my god, Devin." I saw in his eyes that he was freaking out when he saw the blood smeared on the tile floor. "What s that from? We have to get you to a doctor!" He scrambled to his feet and tried to find the phone.

          "No, i'll be fine." I insisted, but i knew i wasn't. "Just take me by car to my doctor." I tried to forget about my anger and frustration (mostly jealously) at Ricky, but that was easier said than done.

         "I'll go get Chris." He murmured, but i grabbed his arm roughly. 

         "No, don't tell him." I already disappointed him once there was no way i was going to do it again, not just yet. I got more and more upset every time i look at the puddles of blood surrounding me.

         Not again...

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Sorry if this sucked but, who do you think the first guy was???? and still what do you think is going on with Ghost???

65 reads, 5 comments, or 18 votes= i update...

COMMENT>VOTE>FOLLOW.

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