Devotion For Salvation (LokixSigyn) ON HOLD

Chapter 17

Dinner wasn't at all terrible. But I did feel guilty afterwords, for forgetting for a split second I was miserable in the first place. I laughed until tears came out, I talked to the point where I could barely speak, I made new companions, and most importantly, I felt happy again. Deveah noticed how happy I was and even invited me to a ball that was to be held tonight. I am looking forward to it.

I was able to talk to Frigga and she offered me a room in the palace so I'd be closer to her for whenever I needed someone. She even got me my own servant, Imogen. Whenever I see her, her green eyes remind me of Loki. I hate it.

"Lady Sigyn, your bath is ready." My new servant says as she wraps a towel around her arm.

"Thanks." I say bluntly, blinking annoyingly. "You can leave now."

She curtsies and leaves. Her olive skin was quite elegant, everything about her was almost perfect.

Except her damned eyes. Green emerald eyes.

Loki is dead and I don't need a reminder of him. She is replusive.

I lock my door to prevent her from coming in for the rest of the day and make my way to my bath.

After I wash myself up I lay still, taking in all the comforting aroma. The sick feeling in my gut won't go away no matter what I do.

I can't possibly miss him forever. Can I?

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The last ball I've been to was Thor's coronation party. I've missed every one after that. But it wasn't my fault for being in a coma for half a year.

It's held in the ball room this time, since it's not as big as the coronation was.

Stop thinking about that damned coronation. That's when my sanity began falling apart.

I slip on the closest dress from the closet entrance, not wanting to put an effort to my appearance. Nothing can cover up my skinny frame, dark under eyes, or my sick and pale face. I can pass off as dead.

I think of the dark magic the healers injected in me several times. Every night when I'm about to fall asleep, I can still feel it suffocating me. The doctor said it could cause harm to my mental and emotional health. Sadly, it has and it's much more worse than I suspected.

I should make an early appearance to the ball, to avoid the drunk friends that might drag me in and make me stay longer. Better to get there while everyone is sober.

"Sigyn?" Three knocks come from the door followed by the jiggling of the door knob.

"Who's there?" I drag myself to the door, dreading who may be outside.

"It's Sylia. Deveah wanted me to come check on you before the party."

"I was just on my way." I force a convincimg smile, Sylia smiles back and comes by my side.

"Shall we go together?"

"We shall."

I'm grateful that Sylia isn't all up in my hair about my mental health like all the other, it's quite nice just to live in the moment rather than in the recent past.

The ball is extravagant. If only I could truly enjoy this night.

I haven't been approached by Deveah and Sylia and I parted ways as soon as we got here. I've become an outcast to my once glorious society. Nothing will ever be the same. It's nearly been a year since Loki died. I can't simply let him go. No one wants to be with a depressed woman.