"Mommy!" Zoe yelled as we walked in the house
"Hey sweetheart." I hugged her
"Everything okay?" Ruby asked in my ear
I gave her a I'll talk to you about it later look and forced a smile on my face to finally introduce
"Zoe I want you to meet your uncle Dez. Dez this is your niece Zoe."
"Hi, I'm Zoe." Zoe smiled and stuck her hand out
"Hi Zoe. I'm your Uncle Dez." he smiled and shook her hand
"Hey I do you want to see the fish tank?"
"Sure." she smiled
"So sweetie how long do you have Zoe for?" my dad asked
"The rest of the summer."
"Oh I thought it was just for the week." my mom questioned with a confused look
"It was but then she said she wanted to stay the rest of the summer and after missing so many years I couldn't say no."
"Mad I don't care why you did it I'm just shocked that you're doing it."
"Wow mom nice to know you feel like I can do this." I whispered on the verge of tears
"No Madison that's not what I meant. I'm just saying taking care of a child is a lot. But I know that I raised a strong intelligent young woman I know you can do this plus you have an amazing support system right here to help." she gave a half smile as she pulled me into a tight hug
"Thanks Mom." I replied in a barely audible voice as silent tears ran down my face
"Mommy Uncle Dez asked is it okay if he takes me to the park?"
"What park Dez?"
"The one up the street that you used to take me to all the time."
"I'm not sure if you two should go up there alone."
"Ill go with them." Ruby volunteered
"No we'll go you two can stay here and get settled in and ready for dinner tonight your mom is making your favorite." My dad said walking towards the door with Zoe and Dez
My mom looked as though she wanted to say something but she just walked out the door behind everybody else leaving me and Ruby alone in the house
"Are you okay?" She asked as soon as the front door closed
"Yeah I'm fine." I lied
"Are you sure?" she asked
"Yep I'm good." I lied
"Madison.........."
"What Ruby? I'm fine can you just let it go?"
"Madison I want you to talk to me." She yelled
"Okay I know this is hard for you right now but I'm here to help but i cant do that if you just shut me out." she took a deep breathe and attempted to speak calmer
"You wont me to tell you that I feel like a shitty parent or that I'm scared to have my daughter for the rest of the summer because I'm scared I'm gonna fuck it up or she's gonna hate me." I cried
"Madison.............Zoe is not going to hate you okay.......all you need to do is calm down okay you got this I know you can do it."
"But what if I cant do it?" I asked while sobbing
"Don't say that because you can and I'm gonna help." She smiled and kissed my forehead
"Now my guess is that we have about 30 minutes before they get back so what do you say?" She smiled and held out her hand
No we didn't have sex but we napped and we napped hard like slob on our pillows hard. I woke up when I heard Zoe walk in the room
"Mommy grandma told me to tell you and Ms. Ruby that dinner is ready."
"Okay sweetie, we'll be there in a few."
"Babe its time to eat." I whispered in her ear
"Eat what?" She sat up and smiled and kissed me
"Stop it my parents are home" I joked as I climbed on top of her and kissed her back
We were in the middle of an intense make out session when the door flung open and my mom walked in
"Oh dear well this is awkward isn't it? Hmmm your dad told me to mind my business but i couldn't just do that and now I walk in and see you getting tongued to death and now I'm......." she started babbling
"Mom....... we'll be up in a second"
"Okay dear I'm gonna leave now."
"Well that wasn't awkward at all." Ruby laughed
"Shut up......." I laughed while punching her
When we walked in the kitchen my mom was fixing Zoe's plate and my dad and Dez where in an intense argument about sports. I fixed me and Ruby's plate and we all sat at the table.
"So what time are we leaving tomorrow?" Dez asked breaking the awkward silence
"We're not leaving until Sunday actual......... were gonna hang out tomorrow. Ruby planned the whole day for us."
"Ohh.....dope.......Where are we going exactly?"
"White Waters." I answered
"Oh cool." Dez cracked a smile
After we finished dinner everybody got ready for bed. I helped Zoe with her bath while Dez played 2k.
I tucked Zoe in to bed then went to take my shower then Ruby took hers.
"Can I ask you something?" I asked climbing in bed with Ruby
"Of course." she smiled and wrapped her arms around me
"Well now that I think about it its not really a question its more of a statement at least I think its a statement I'm......." I started rambling
"Madison what is it?" she sat up and questioned
"I want to thank you for not letting me wallow in my own self doubt it means a lot to me."
"I already told you I'm here for you hopefully you believe me."
"I know you said it and I believed...... I believe you its just it feels different having someone in my corner for a change."
"Madison I'm here for you now and that's all that matters okay? I don't want to hear anymore about this for the rest of the time Zoe is here." she said sternly and rolled to face away from me
"Okay." I whispered
Uuuuggggggghhhhhhhhh I think she's mad at me. I don't know why but I mean I guess I have been a bit of a Debbie downer lately. I mean I know she's just upset because she keeps saying she's here for me and I honestly believe her its just I'm really scared...... I'm scared to be spending time with my daughter I'm scared to fully fall for Ruby.....I'm scared that maybe this is lust and not love..........I'm scared to lose her but I'm also scared to stay.
------------------------------------------------------
Let me know how you're feeling
Comment
Vote
Share with your friends
