Reflections of my Heart (Part I )

Loving Him

July 21,2006

I want to know his mind.....
His thoughts, ideas, dreams, daydreams, plans, melancholies, probing, curiosities, building-up, itineraries, scattering, ignorance, follies, foibles, opinions, innocence, learning, intelligence, failures, imaginations, staring, nothingness, understanding, comprehension, dawning, waywardness, wandering, stillness, fantasies, realities, pride, stubbornness, humility, hardheadedness, willingness, confusions, certainties, inquiries, lewdness, presumptions, assumptions, conclusions, compromises, doubts.....
Knowing all these.....still.....
I will choose to love his mind.

I want to know his heart.....
His love, cares, fears, strength, worries, weaknesses, halfheartedness, sorrows, pains, sadness, loneliness, joys, sacrifices, silence, peacefulness, acceptance, giving, enviousness, jealousies, anger, impatience, spiritedness, courage, patience, disappointments, happiness, discouragements, hopelessness, exuberance, boldness, cowardice, noise, chaos, forgiveness, rejections, abandonment, neediness, straying, home, family, crippling, confidence, selfishness, trust, fullness, emptiness, selflessness, vulnerabilities, truthfulness, standing-up, moving on, risks, hopefulness.....
Knowing all these.....still.....
I will choose to love his heart.

I want to know his soul.....
His faith, uniqueness, personality, character, self-control, spirituality, relationships, beliefs, unbelief, questions, uncertainties, aloneness, specialization, idiosyncracies, holiness, whole-being, self-righteousness, importance, securities, depth, temptations, darkness, sinfulness, meekness, immobility, perfectionism, imperfections, intricacies, desires, guilt, commitments, values, virtues, preparations, wonders, awes, chasm, grace, life, wholeness, breathing.....
Knowing all these.....still.....
I will choose to love his soul.

I want to know his physique.....
His hugs, touch, caress, kiss, passion, tucking, tickles, laughter, smile, frown, concentration, distraction, walk, run, dance, talents, texture, face, gait, sweetness, slumber, hobbies, fun, sports, colors, music, books, interest, facade, blemishes, tears, sobbing, jokes, antics, lameness, shouts, teachings, searching, paleness, vibrancy, togetherness, nearness, chemistry, connection, eyes, conversations, irks, cuddling, quirks, posture, odor, fragrance, stance, voice, timbre.....
Knowing all these.....still.....
I will choose to love his physique.

Through all these knowing, it is still my decision
my risk, my choice to love him.....

Faith, hope and love remains,
but the greatest of these is love.....
It never fails,
So, I am committed to love him still.....