Linger

N I N E

Of course. Of course, it wouldn't work. We were teacher and student. He was right. And deep down, I knew it wouldn't work. 

Over and over again, he told me he couldn't make any promises. And over and over again, I told him I understood. 

But I also hoped. I hoped that it could work. I really truly hoped. 

The rain outside was now pouring, creating a bigger commotion in the halls than usual. I tried my best to make my way toward the exit, nearly colliding into a group of football players as they ran past, shaking their wet hair with wide smiles. I tightened my grip on my bag as I kept my head down, hoping to avoid talking to anyone before leaving. All I wanted to do was get out of here. I couldn't talk. 

No, scratch that. 

I couldn't even think straight. 

Luckily, I've been at this miserable school for so long I knew my way to the exit almost too well.

I sniffed & wiped the tears from my eyes with my sleeves, before instantly regretting it upon seeing my makeup smudged all over my jacket. 

Perfect.

With a huff of annoyance, I pushed the door open to go outside.

The sound of the rain grew even louder along with the familiar call of my friends,

"Maddie! Maddie!!"

Guilt instantly flooded me and I tugged my hood over my head before I rushed down the stairs, hoping I could lose myself in the small crowd.

"Mads! Madison!!" 

I kept hurrying toward the parking lot, despite hearing my friends' footsteps approaching me.  Cold droplets of water hit my skin, causing goosebumps to rise and I somehow found myself wishing I was back in Daniel's classroom, warm and safe, with him. Where the rain was nothing more than a comforting sound than a threat and annoyance and nothing else could bother us. 

"Maddie! Hey, wait up!" my friends continued to call out.

"I can't! I've gotta go!" I did my best to tell them, but the crack in my voice was noticeable, so I only started walking faster, squinting my eyes to see through the pouring rain for any sign of my mom's car. Why was this parking lot so big?

"Madison?" It was Alice's voice who held concern for me. "Hey, are you alright?" She held an umbrella as she jogged to keep up with my quick pace & caught up to me, holding it over the both of us.

"Thanks," I told her quietly, wiping my damp hair away from my face as she walked beside me. And for the first time today, I was actually thankful for the rain as it concealed the tears running down my cheeks. 

"We're meeting Sasha at the coffee shop. Wanna come?" she asked, walking next to me. "Or we could get you something."

"I gotta go." I nodded to my mom's car as we approached it. Somewhere in between leaving his classroom and getting out here, I sent a quick text to my mom to pick me up, finding myself oddly thankful Sasha borrowed my car earlier. I was too upset to drive right now anyway. 

"I'll call you," she said as I climbed in & shut the door, ignoring the tug on my heart as I kept my head down to avoid my friends. I knew it was rude. But I couldn't bring myself to speak. I'd just break down.

"Hi sweetie! How was your day?" my mom greeted as I placed my backpack down by my feet. 

And something about her warm smile and the heat of the car immediately engulfing me as I settled in caused the heat to rush to my head as even more tears flooded my eyes.