Linger

T W E N T Y - T H R E E

"Hey, did you get my message?"

I stopped in my actions as I turned around to see Tom, taking a seat in the chair next to mine. I searched my mind frantically for an answer as I mentally slapped myself on the forehead. 

With everything else that happened this weekend, Tom's text had completely slipped my mind ever since I talked to Mr. Hayden at the game on Saturday. I wouldn't really know how to reply to his message anyway.

My mind went blank as I tried to answer Tom. I could feel his bright blue eyes on me as I stared idly at my notebook. "I'm so sorry." I shook my head. "Ugh, I still have to give your jacket back too," I groaned as I buried my face in my hands.

"It's alright." He chuckled. "I was actually hoping you'd give me another chance." He flashed his perfect smile at me.

I lifted my head from my hands to look at the whiteboard ahead of me at the front of the classroom, not wanting to fall under his spell that so many have fallen under, as I thought about his proposal.

"I still owe you one, you know." He nudged my shoulder playfully with his own.

"True," I replied simply, returning my attention back to my work. I just didn't know if this is what I wanted at the moment. Especially if it was going to turn out the same way it did on Friday night.

"So, what do you say? There's another game this Friday." He smiled excitedly.

I sighed deeply in frustration. This was starting to sound a whole lot like how our "date" went last week, which I definitely did not want a repeat of. 

 I glanced up at the clock, noticing we had been in class for half an hour now and Tom had yet to even get his books and materials out. 

He smirked as he realized I was looking in his direction, but I was only noticing his empty desk in front of him.

"I don't know about this Friday," I said, reaching up to my hair and gathering it to one side, keeping my gaze on my work in front of me.

"How about next Friday?" he pressed, persistent for an answer.

Mrs. Karlsson shushed us harshly from her desk in the front before returning to the computer screen in front of her. 

We both sent her apologetic stares, before I simply shrugged. I didn't think I'd even go on a date with him if it was on a Friday ten weeks from now. My mind always seem to drift elsewhere when I was him. It was always on someone else.

"Hey, if this is about what happened Friday night, then I'm sorry," he apologized, his bright eyes searching my face. "I'll be more careful this time. I promise. We'll go for dinner right after the game. No tricks or anything in between."

"I don't know, Tom."

"Come on, it's either yes or no, Madison. It's not that hard to think about," he told me, his voice growing impatient and I almost wanted to laugh at the irony of his words.

It was hard to think about. Especially for me, since I always seemed to be making things into a much more bigger deal for no apparent reason. 

For some reason, my mind was telling me that if I did go out with Tom, everything with Mr. Hayden would be out the window. I would finally move on from him. But my conscience gently reminded me that he was the one I truly longed for, regardless of who I was with or the fact he was the one who wanted to keep our lives separate.

I went back and forth, from my mind to my heart, trying to settle on an answer, but there wasn't one. Suddenly, the bell rang, pulling me out of my debate with myself.