Secret Admirer || Phan

.Chapter 8.

Hello my lovelies! First of all I would just like to thank you all for getting this book over 700 reads! That's actually amazing so thank you so much. I never thought anyone would read this book but I literally have so many nice comments from people saying that they love it! So yeah thank you so so so much I love you! 💕✨

Dans POV

I walked into school, slightly upset that I wouldn't see Phil today; I was so excited to see his cute little face. But I would probably only be seeing it upset. I am his bully after all. Ugh I hate the way I treat him. I would probably have a chance with him if I wasn't such a dick.

I sigh as my two 'best friends' walk up to me; Chris and Peej.

"Hey Dan! The little faggot isn't in today..hopefully he has killed himself" Chris laughed, Peej joining in with him. It took every ounce of me to not punch him straight in the face. I just forced a laugh, I felt horrible about it though. Phil would never do such a thing..would he?

I suddenly felt sick at the thought of home ever hurting himself in any way. I can't let him do that. He means so much to me, but he will never know that because of the way I have treated him for so long. I'm the worst. What sort of person hurts the person they have feelings for? Apparently me.

I tried to put the thoughts to the back of my head as I walk to class with Peej and Chris.

About half an hour into the lesson, I decided to text Phil, just to make sure he is okay. I'm worried about him.

To Phil <3
Hey beautiful..How are you feeling? Xx

A few minutes later I got a reply from him. I automatically smiled to myself.

From Phil <3
I'm okay thank you, I'm feeling a little better. I've just been asleep for a bit. Xx

I must have woke him up. I bet he looks adorable when he's all sleepy and stuff. Aw I can just imagine his cute little smile and his hair slightly messy. All I want to do now is just cuddle with him and keep him company. But I'll never get to do that. I'll never get to call him mine. I'll never be anything but a bully to him. But, that's all I am..a bully.

I realise i haven't text Phil back, so I quickly reply.

To Phil <3
Aw I didn't wake you up did I? I'm so sorry , but you look adorable when you're sleepy xx

From Phil <3
Aw shush..nothing about me is 'adorable' .. I don't know what you like about me..xx

I feel myself frown at this message, knowing it is all my fault that he feels this way about himself. I won't ever forgive myself for causing such a beautiful human so much pain...

To Phil <3
Don't talk low of yourself love. You are gorgeous, literally everything about you is perfect. Your smile, your laugh, your eyes, your personality, the way your tongue pokes out the side of your mouth when you laugh. I literally love everything about you Phil. I just wish you saw how perfect you were.. Xxx

Before he got a chance to reply, Peej looked over at me and asked who I was messaging. I mumbled a small 'no one' and quickly messaged Phil.

To Phil <3
I really don't want to but I have to go as I am currently in class and don't really feel like getting caught. I will message you later, stay perfect Phil xx

I locked my phone and put it back in my pocket, thinking only about Phil and how I wish I could call him mine..

But we all know that won't ever happen. I don't deserve him. I don't deserve anyone.