Liars #FreeYourBody

Two

Kyle's POV
At 3 A.M in the morning, I texted my mom I'd be leaving for the day. I didn't want her to worry, but I also didn't want to bother her. Since my room is so close to my parents', I heard the bickering, even if it was so early in the morning.

What broke me about the constant arguments was I knew it wasn't going to change. Especially since I'd already seen the divorce papers Dad brought home one day.

I thought it was all so sudden. That my family was picture perfect. That it would never break. But each one of us were breaking down in so many different ways.

*******

Kyle: Ditch school, ya?

Mike: Ya... Need to get out of this dump. Where?

Kyle: I say downtown. Meet ya there.

That was the end of the texts with Mike. He knew what to do. He knew what to bring. But I certainly did not want him to bring my sister, Montana.

I think it would scare her to death if she knew what I was really doing when I ditched, or I left all the time. It was best she didn't know, seeing all the issues she already has. Since Mo is Mike's girlfriend, it's a certain risk of me doing any of the deeds I do.

I grabbed my leather jacket silently, and crept down the hall, to my sister's room. I creaked the door open a smudge, just to see her laying in her bed. Wrong. She wasn't there. Ever since two or three months ago, it seemed to be like this. I'd leave, and she wouldn't be sleeping.

I remembered when she was happily and soundfully asleep. I don't know why it's all changed, but I know where to find her when she's not in bed. The bathroom.

I bet Mo never knew I left and checked on her at 3 in the morning. But I did. And it sure confused me when I first passed the bathroom.

I crept up to the door, surely to find her doing the exact same thing she did and still does since three months ago. Breathing. It sounds normal to you. It seems like breathing is definitely normal. Regular, nothing wrong.

But there always is. It's not regular breathing, it's insane. It sounds like she holds her breathe for 20 minutes, to see herself in the mirror, looking at her ribs. As if she can't see them already.

It breaks me every time she does this because she hold it in so long, she's left with cries and yelps because she can't breathe. It hurts her. But she still does it every morning. I don't know why, and I badly want to help her. But I feel like that's my parents job. But my parents are busy getting divorced and arguing to care the slightest about their struggling daughter, Mo.

"Shut up, okay? I want to sleep. It will be better for the both of us if you'd just shut up!" Mom shouted. With a slap I could recognize from miles away, Mom started to cry. "Don't you cry. You know you deserved it." And with that, I grabbed the keys to my bike and rode off into the empty streets.

*******
For hours, I was left alone. I was left sitting on a nearby bench, waiting for Mike. I refused to do anything illegal without Mike. It is an addiction. But I felt like a criminal every time I did it without someone. So, I watched cars and people pace around me, not even taking a second glance at the teenage boy sitting on a bench in school hours.

Finally, when 9 AM rolled around, Mike showed up, luckily without Mo. "Where you been, bruh?" I fist pumped Mike. "Where you think I've been?" He handed me a small packet and I smiled, gulping down the guilt begging to come out of me.

"You get me a new lighter?" Mike asked. I handed him one of my new ones and he nodded. When I handed him the lighter, he held the joint by the tip off his mouth and bit the end.

I didn't know why he did this, but he did. He would chew the end, then eat the remains. I did the same, and soon enough, I wasn't able to comprehend the world around me. I knew what I was. I was high. I loved the feeling. I sniffed until my nose got numb.

I knew what I was doing. I was doing the worst a teen could. But there was no other way to feel happy, and not lonely. I felt depressed, with my family broken and beat at my side. But they left my side long times ago. And it is up to me to fix myself.

But I don't know if I'm fixing myself anymore. I think I'm breaking faster than everyone else.