My Book of Everything

Weird, New, and Happy

I just had a big what-ever-you-call-it, one of the moments when you finally realize something, and it's suddenly all clear. I've had them before, but they're all so big and heart relieving.
After recent circumstances, I've been emailing someone, a boy, and I don't mind it. It doesn't feel like a chore, you may even say I enjoy it. At first, I panicked, because I thought, 'Do I like him, as in, more than a friend?' but then I realized, no, I do like him, but just as a friend. I've haven't had a friend that's a boy in so long, that I mistook this feeling to the one of having a crush on someone. That sort of scares me. Like, I know that it's okay for a girl to have a friend that's a guy, I actually had one once, but it's still a weird feeling.
But, you wanna know the biggest part No matter how weird it feels, I'm happy. I like having a boy as a friend, not as a boyfriend, but just a friend. I don't know if anyone will ever read this, but if anyone ever does, I want them to know one thing. In this moment, right now, I am happy. And that's all that matters.
😢😞😪😭😥😟👋.
4:52pm, November 1, 2015