Chapter 10

76 3 0
                                    

My birthday party was the simplest ever. I had a couple of people over and that was that. I didn’t like grand things that declared my birthday because, to be honest, I didn’t really care. I was just another day older and I felt exactly the same. Well not the same. I felt worse. My best friend with the guy I liked more than ever. Ha. I just have that kind of luck.

Kenz and Mel slept over at my place and we decided we would go hit the mall Saturday too. Mel and Kenz rode in the car but I decided I wanted to ride my new bike. I loved the wind and the a speed. I felt like it was dangerous and I liked it because I felt like all my life all I had done was live inside the lines. But I suppose the real reason I wanted to ride the bike was that I didn’t have to deal with Kenzlie. I couldn’t really stand her gushing over Blaze all the time.

My parents had gotten my a Suzuki Hyabusa in black and Mel had gotten me a leather jacket to go with it. I loved it and Kenzlie’s gift was great too. She had gotten me an amplifier for my electric guitar. I had recently bought one (I had an acoustic already) and I still needed an amp. Blaze’s gift? Thank you Blaze. It’s my favorite. Ha.

I sped up and parked in the mall parking lot and ran inside fingering the black credit card. I really didn’t have anything I wanted to buy because I had pretty much everything I wanted. Except Blaze.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monday rolled around and while I was getting ready I looked out my window and saw Blaze looking over at me. I grabbed my phone and texted him.

Xoe: What? Do I have something on my face or something?

Blaze: No.

Xoe: Then why are you looking at me.

Blaze: I wasn’t.

Xoe: Yes you were!!

Blaze: So I’m not allowed to even look at my best friend?

I sighed. That’s all I’ll ever be. His best friend that stands next to him. Nothing more and nothing less. He was right there and yet he was so far away. Should I smile because he’s my best friend or cry because that’s all we’ll ever be? So I did both.

Blaze: Why are you crying?

Xoe: I’m not.

Blaze: Don’t lie to me.

Xoe: I have my contacts in and they’re irritating me. I’m not lying!! :)

I looked out my window back at Blaze and I smiled my best fake smile and went to go get ready.

I wore a black cropped top with skinny jeans and my new leather jacket. I grabbed my phone, my bag, and my keys off of my bed and went to get my bike out of the garage. I hopped onto my parent’s birthday gift and rode.

I turned the corner and sped off to school but not before I saw Blaze with his arm around Kenzlie. I hate this. I hate lying to them and I hate not being about to say what I want to say and I hate covering my feelings and I hate all of this but Kenzlie’s my friend and so was Blaze. I can’t just tear them apart even if that means that I tear myself apart on the inside.

-----------------------------------------------------------

“OMG LOOK AT THIS!!” Kenzlie screamed holding out her wrist showing me a braclet. “Blaze got me this for my birthday!”

It had been a few weeks since they have been dating and we had already established they were a couple. I was over at her house celebrating her birthday and she had thrown a massive party. I smiled and gave her a hug saying that they were such a cute couple. It was true. They were a real cute couple and I had trained my fake smile to come easier.

“Thanks! Isn’t it pretty!!” She said admiring it and holding out her hand once again.

“Yeah it’s gorgeous.” I smiled and then walked away just as I saw Blaze rounding the corner coming up to Kenzlie giving her a hug.

He saw me out of the corner of his eye and I smiled at him and walked away. I was getting tired of just staying at this party because my head was pounding to the loud music and I was tired. I had to school and work tomorrow too. I started to leave but someone caught my elbow and turned me around.

“Hey Xoe.” Conner said to me, his blue eyes shining.

“Hey Conner. How are you?” I said.

“Great. How are you?”

“I’m fine. Listen I have a headache I need to go home.”

“I’ll drive you” He offered. To be honest I didn’t really want Conner to drive me as I just wanted to be alone but seeing how Melanie had driven me here and I was in no position to walk in my stilettos and dress I guess I would just take his offer.

“Okay sure thanks.” I said flashing him one of my fake smiles. Most of the people I knew bought my fake happiness or they learned that I wouldn’t tell them what was wrong anyway. Melanie was the only one that caught that something was wrong but she didn’t say much to me either as she didn’t want to upset me further.

Me and Conner walked out to his car and he drove me home. There wasn’t much to be said really so we just stayed quiet for most of the ride but when we got to my house he opened my door he said. “I know he’s a jerk Xoe. Don’t let him get to you.” Then shut the door and drove away. How did he know?

(Conner’s POV)

I know I shouldn’t have been snooping but it seems like Blaze had hurt Xoe somehow but Blaze was oblivious to this. I didn’t know what exactly had happened but I knew that Xoe just wasn’t herself. I just wanted her to be happy and stop being so invisible. If someone said something was wrong she would just smile and deny it. She had her smile trained. It wasn’t real and her bubbly self had vanished as well. Everything was fake. I could tell. I just never really said anything because she would just smile again and deny it.

What would I give just to make her mine…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okie dokie folks! How'd you like that? Sorry I know it's kinda boring but it's a filler chapter. Like always thanks so much for reading and Rock on fellow Watties ;)

~iWriteinspiration

So Much For My Happy EndingWhere stories live. Discover now