Limerence | I

31. Pill Popping

"You left early." I heard Xavier's voice as I played on my phone and waited for class to start. He closed the door to the practice room behind him and took a seat beside me. I stood quiet with nothing to say. It was evident that he was too happy and I assumed that it was because B.Dee told him that he knew. However, I didn't feel bad for not telling him. I didn't have much of a choice being that my family's life was in danger. Anyone would have done the same. "Why didn't you tell me about my dad?" He asked. I sighed, pursed my lips, and set my phone down on my lap. Honestly, I didn't think he would bring it up so soon. I expected him to hold out a little longer.

"Because I didn't have a choice." I said without remorse. I assumed that B.Dee didn't tell him the whole story. Why would he? 

"Bullshit." He scoffed. I shot him a menacing look and he returned it. I felt slightly offended that he didn't even ask to hear my side of the situation. Then again, he could be a little close minded. When he has something in his mind, there was no way to get it out. So at the moment, he felt like I purposely lied to him.

"You don't know the whole story, Xav-"

"I don't care about the whole story. You shouldn't have lied to me." He said boldly but quietly while students began filing into the practice room. I suddenly got defensive and felt the need to argue my case. I could feel yet another fight coming on but this time I wouldn't be the one feeling bad. I had no reason to apologize. 

"If you're gonna' be pissed off at anyone, it should be your father. He's the one that lied to you for 20 years." I spat. He clenched his jaw, stopping himself from yelling. He looked away from me and took a a long pause. It felt like the silence lasted an eternity. 

"I expected this from him, not you." He told me, focusing his attention straight ahead. "I thought I could trust you of all people." I rolled my eyes and let out an exaggerated sigh. He was being dramatic and I wasn't in the mood for it. The least he could do was hear me out but I knew that wasn't going to happen. 

"You haven't been the most truthful either." I stated, sipping my coffee from my Starbucks mug. "How long were you gonna' pretend to be clueless?" 

"It doesn't matter because at the end of the day, my family business doesn't have anything to do with you." Little did he know that it did. I didn't want to be involved but I couldn't push the thought that B.Dee might have killed my brother out of my mind. And that he threatened the people I love. But even after I found out that Xavier was his son, I stuck around. So yes, it had everything to do with me. I was involved and there was no way out. 

"It has more to do with me than you think." I stood up from my seat and tossed my bag over my shoulder. With the mood I was in, I couldn't imagine sitting in class for three hours. "Whenever you're ready to take the time to listen to me for once, then we'll talk." I walked out of the room just as Professor Huck was walking in. From the corner of my eye, I saw him give me a confused stare but I kept walking. I didn't want to talk to anyone but I remembered that I told Alex I would check on Astrid. I just wanted to get it over with so I could go home and be alone.

Astrid's apartment was walking distance from the school. I arrived at the building within ten minutes. I took the elevator up to the hallway eighth floor and walked down to the last door in the hallway. I reached into my bag for the key that I still had. I kept it because every now and then, I would stop by to get something that I needed, then I would leave just as quickly as I came. I unlocked the door and saw no one. The apartment was cold, like no one had turned on the heater in weeks. The TV in the living room was on but no one was watching it. It was unusual being that she didn't watch it very often. I doubt she would ever forget to turn it off. I walked down the log hallway toward Astrid's bedroom. I softly knocked on the door and waited for an answer. 

Nothing. 

"Astrid?" I knocked again, this time calling her name. 

Still nothing. 

I opened the door and as I expected, no one was inside. There was an eerie feeling and cold feeling as soon as I took a step inside. It sent chills down my spine and the goosebumps on my arms appeared. Her bed was made perfectly, her purple sheets absent of any wrinkles or creases. Her stuffed animals perfectly lined up against the fluffed pillows. The window leading to the fire escape was open, making her curtains blow with the wind. I noticed she had a few loose pictures spread across the top of her dresser. I got curious and walked over to check them out. 

They were all of her and Xavier but one of them in particular caught my eye. The two of them were young. Like early high school years young. They held each other's hands with the biggest smiles stretched across their faces. I could tell it was taken in the winter by the sheet of white snow on the ground and how they wore heavy coats, scarves and gloves. They stood in front of a tree that they had carved their names in. 

Xavier + Astrid 4Ever 

The picture was beautiful but I couldn't bring myself to smile. I knew I was in the wrong for unintentionally splitting them up. And at that moment, I knew that I had to apologize. Not only to her but to Xavier for ruining everything. Even though, he told me it wasn't my fault, there had to be a part of him that knew the truth. And I didn't want to be a constant reminder of the trouble I caused by sticking around. 

I set the picture down and turned on my heels. I walked out of the room, closing the door behind me. I was ready to leave when I saw the bathroom light on. The door was closed but the high yellow light peeked from the cracks. I knocked on the bathroom door, this time half expecting her to answer. But she didn't. 

"Astrid, are you in there?" I asked. When she didn't respond, I sighed to myself. "I came to make sure you're alright... Can we talk?" I waited... and waited. And still nothing. The least I could do before I left was turn out the light for her. So I opened the door, immediately regretting it. The sight of Astrid's body on the cold tile floor was horrifying. Her usually penetrating and excited eyes were glassed over and lifeless. Her caramel skin no longer had a glow to it. Instead, it was pale. I frantically dropped to my knees beside her and took hold of her hand. It was ice cold. "Astrid, wake up!" I yelled with urgency. I shook her shoulders, desperate for her to give me a sign. I needed her to breath, cough, move, anything. I pressed my head to her chest, checking for any sign of life. When I couldn't hear her heart beating, I broke down. 

Tears poured out of my eyes like a waterfall and they weren't stopping any time soon. I sobbed just the way I did when I found out that Derrick died. It wasn't until I noticed the empty prescription bottle at the other side of the bathroom that I knew what she had done. It only made me cry harder. This was my fault. 

Don't forget to comment and vote, Darlings. I'm going to start on the next chapter really soon.