I have Tear In My Heart finished but the thing is, I need Josh. not just for the beats of the song, I need him because he was my first and only friend until Jenna came around.
I'm going over to his house after school which happens to be right near the school so I'll walk to his house.
I went to Mr. Nolan's office at the end of the day, not to talk to him about my problems, I had to talk to him about Tear In My Heart.
He said he was happy about me finally getting through the song and I asked Mr. Owens if I could use his piano to practice the song.
He said okay to it, surprisingly, since he's kind of mean for a teacher, if you recall how my first day went.
So, I headed out of Mr. Nolan's office and started walking to Josh's house.
Be aware that this was 3 weeks after I actually had finished writing Tear In My Heart, after I had been beaten up by Alex in Mr. Nolan's office, that was a hard day. Unfortunately, it caught up with me, literally.
"Wait up, Tyler!" I heard Alex's voice.
I start walking faster, "I said wait up, not speed up!"
I start sprinting for 9 seconds before he catches up and grabs my shoulder, "What? What do you want?" I whine.
"I just needed to say something, ya pussy."
"Go ahead and say it."
"Haven't you been aware that I'm only teasing you?"
"Are you? Are you only teasing me? Let's see, you beat me up 3 weeks ago, you've been calling me names, mean ones at that, for 4 years, you've been pushing me around for 4 years. You call that teasing?"
"Of course, you're just too sens- I am not sensitive, you're the one who needs to be beaten up. There is only reason you'd pick on somebody.." I Interrupt Alex
"And that is?"
I think back to my first day as a Senior, "Your insecurities got the best of you.. I don't even know if there is a best of you. I'm not gonna say for you to work at whatever you're trying to major in but if you're ever going to major in something, you have to dispose those insecurities, those fears, those uncertainties.. Fear might be the death of you if you don't try... However, after all, Peace will win and fear will lose."
I notice a paper sticking out his pocket, "What's that?" I point.
"I-Er, it's something I've-Uh, been writing for a while."
"Can I see it?"
"Sure." He hands me the paper.
I stroll past the words.. These are lyrics, he's writing lyrics. Does he want to be a songwriter?
"Maybe, I'm a fucking waste, filling up the empty space, I've been here way too long." I say, that's one of the lyrics. Excuse my sinful language.
I glance at him, "My friends and I, we've got a lot of problems.. Never really wanted to write lyrics until I realized that I was actually hurting everybody around me, both, verbally and physically."
"Are the lyrics based on you? Or something around you?"
"Yeah, sort of." He shrugs his shoulders.
I gasp, I didn't think he had such a bad life.
I hug him, "Ty, I really am sorry for hurting you these past years."
"It's not fine but I respect your apology... If you ever need help, whether or not it's with lyrics or life, I'd suggest coming to myself, not that I know much about lyrics but, in this life, not gonna lie, I have become wise."
He chuckles, "Oh, I'm sure."
"We'll talk tomorrow. I'm just in a rush right now."
"Oh, alright, tomorrow, I guess."
I wave and he walks in the opposite direction.
I continue to walk to Josh's house.
Then, I'm there before I know it.
I knock on the front door, "Hi, Mrs. Dun, can I see Josh?"
"Oh, sure you can." She welcomes me into the house.
"He's upstairs, honey."
I smile and nod and run up the stairs.
I slightly knock on his door, I don't hear anything and so, I walk in.. Which was a mistake.
I see Josh at his computer and Debby on the screen.
Debby is only in a bra on the screen.
Josh is doing something with his hands.
"Josh?"
"Wha-Oh my god, turn around!"
So, I turned to the wall where I couldn't see Josh and Debby.
He said bye to the computer, I think It was probably Debby.
"Alright, you can turn around, now."
He's not doing anything with his hands anymore and Debby isn't on the screen anymore.
"What were you doing, Joshua?"
"I was masturbating, thank you very much."
"But, what was Debby doing?"
He groans and palms his forehead, "We were having Skype sex."
"What in god's name is that?"
"Ty, she started stripping down and I had to do my own thing."
"Uh.."
"Don't act uncomfortable, you jerk off just like me."
"I haven't jerked off ever since I stopped hanging out with Jenna."
"Aw, you're lovestruck, fucking adorable, what do you want?" He starts picking up tissues and throwing them in the trash. I guess he.. Uh.. Came to Debby. That's gross.
"Wait a second.. Have you guys had sex yet? Not Skype sex, real sex."
"Yeah, the first and only time was a week and a half ago so, what do you want?"
"I finished Tear In My Heart and - Tear In My- What?" Josh interrupts me.
"It's the song I have to write for China which I'll be performing a about a month and a half."
"Repeat it."
I sigh, "Tear. In. My. Heart."
"Okay, what about it?"
"I know I made you mad with what happened a few weeks ago, I shouldn't had called you that word but I made the sheet music. One for the piano which I'm playing and one for the drums which you're playing."
"You still expect me to drum for you after you called me a cunt?"
"No, I don't expect you to do it but- Tyler, stop. I'm not going to drum for you. If we're ever going to make up, it's gonna take more than a music sheet and 3 minutes." He interrupts me.
"Josh, I'm sorry, I never meant to call you that- Tyler!" He clutched his fists at his side.
I set the sheet music for the drums on his bed because there was no point in keeping it.
"We're a dead end road, Tyler."
"Us?"
He nods.
I leave his room before he says one last thing, "By the way, sorry is getting a little old. Not just to you but when anybody uses the, 'I'm sorry' excuse, it's old."
I nod.
I leave his house and walk to my house.
Maybe, we are a dead end road.
YOU ARE READING
Courtesy Of Blurryface
FanfictionTyler Jøseph is a Seniør in High Schøøl whø happens tø be a pessimistic løner. He has a guidance cøunselør tø talk tø as well as his best friend, Jøsh Dun. Øne day, he meets Jenna. Jenna helps him thrøugh his last year as she's ønly a Juniør in High...