Waves Breaking Over Rocks Part 2

Chapter 7

Annie

"This is what you have to wear, Annie, I'm sorry. You look beautiful, though."

I look in the mirror and frown deeply at the horrible net that only covers the smallest of things so I'm not technically naked. I want to start crying because I know this is what Finnick feels like all the time. I'm disgusted and extremely uncomfortable. Louis pushes me into the room, but as soon as he's gone, I run to a corner and shrink, protecting myself from the views of others. I try to look for Finnick, for once in my life hoping that he doesn't see me. He'll get angry and I hate to see Finnick angry at anyone.

I spot him walking towards me and my eyes widen. His outfit is worse than mine. It doesn't cover anything at all, only so much as a thin layer over his loin. Finnick will help me, Finnick will help me, Finnick will help me.

"Annie, stand up." He commands with a stern voice. I shake my head, not wanting him to see. What if he thinks I'm as bad as the capitol women? I couldn't stand that. He asks a few more times until I finally gain to courage to get up. He looks me over with his sea-green eyes. They look disgusted and I shrink back again. I disgust him, I disgust him, I disgust him. He turns around and runs away to where Louis is. I run after him because I can't stand being alone and half-naked in a room full of people I don't know, who are also going to try to kill me.

"Louis! You get her out of that costume, now! It's not her job to be exposed, is it? It's mine! So get her changed!" Finnick yells. Louis looks like he might have a heart attack. I feel bad for him, but the quicker I'm dressed, the better.

"How am I supposed to do that? There are no more costumes!" Louis explains.

"Well then cover her up for Christ's sake!" Louis is so afraid he takes some golden netting from nearby and wraps it around me repeatedly until finally Finnick tells him to leave. He then turns to me and, in a much more gentle voice, starts talking to me. "Feel better now, love?"

"Finnick, you're not supposed to call me that in public." I remind him.

"Oh, these people know that is they say a word, they will be the first to go down." His words send a shiver up my spine. He puts his arm around me protectively and leads me to the chariot.

The doors open and, even with the extra netting, I feel uncomfortable. As soon as we come out, I hear the immediate cheers for my lover.

"Finnick! Finnick! Finnick!" I just smile and wave, like Finnick told me to so many years ago.

I see President Snow, and I stop smiling. I give him the worst look I can manage, full of hate and loathing. I do it for Finnick too, because he's too busy smiling at women, and it's all I can do to keep from giving them that look too.

Snow looks down at Finnick and smiles. It's sly and insulting and I have to keep tears in again, this time not from sadness or embarrassment, but from anger. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him. I can't stop the tears and they flow down my cheeks. Finnick turns slightly to peek at me and he notices I'm crying. He can't say anything, but he looks worried. I hadn't realized I had been saying the words out loud until now.

"I hate him, I hate him, I hate him, I hate him, I hate him..." I repeat over and over. Finnick looks down and then back up again at the crowd and I makes my heart break. It's what he does when he's in pain. He hides it then to show he's alright. Finally, we're enveloped by the darkness of the big room. Finnick gets off the horse and helps me down. We walk to the center in silence. Finally, we lay down on our bed and just let the tears flow. Be strong, be strong, be strong; I tell myself. I can't, I can't, I can't. I can't be strong, I'm weak. Finnick is wrong. I'm not strong enough for this, but I have to keep fighting, I have to keep going.