A Pinch of Kerry

I Just Wanted Some Coffee

I ran off the train, and walked a block to the Starbucks. As I am ordering my coffee, I see Di. Me being me, I waved my arms high and screamed "DIANNA! DIANNA!" She looked up at me in utter annoyance. I couldn't help but laugh. Meanwhile, the cashier is staring at me like I'm a freak show.

"Oh I-.."

"That'll be 4.69"

I just ignored the awkward situation and reached for my purse. After I pay for my coffee, I looked for Dianna. She was sitting by herself on her laptop.

"Must you act like toddler when I see you?"

"I wouldn't be me if I didn't" I said as I took a sip of my coffee.

All of a sudden a crowd of people rushed into the coffee shop. Some people are crying, some are screaming. What the hell is going on? Dianna is still on her laptop, unbothered. Then, a naked man walks into the shop. "What in the FUCK?" I said in pure confusion. He had a bomb on his back.

"NOBODY MOVE. I'll set this thing off! I swear!" He yelled.

Damn. Damn. Damnnn. This happens the day I just wanted some coffee. I got a coffee maker. Why must I leave the comforts of my house? I look over to Di and she still didn't care. I'm guessing it's some naked man coalition, because his friend who is also naked runs in. This guy is naked, with a gun. They whisper to each other and he starts to aim his gun. Great. I'm gonna die for my coffee. Write "Starbucks" on my tombstone. It hit me, my cellphone fell in a bowl of cereal, thats why I didn't call the police. What about everyone else? I leaned over to a man who wore little to no pants (does anyone here like to be clad?) "Hey. Did you call the police?"

"Everyone has tried, but its no signal. Something in his bomb is altering the satellites."

"Soooo, you want Macbook on your tombstone?" I turn to Dianna

"Wait, what's going on?!" She finally notices.

"Are you serious?! Its a possibility we could DIE and you have no idea ?!"

"Im sorry, I have a dissertation to type. Why hasn't anyone called the police?"

"Satelites are blocked. Shoot somebody an email, or get on skype."

"I can't. M-.."

In the mist of her speaking, this woman went into labor.

"I need a hospital!" Her husband shouted.

"Does it look like we all have hospitals in our pockets? We can't leave!" I said.

Luckily, Dianna was an MD, maybe she could deliver the baby.

"That lady's in labor. You gonna help her ?"

"I'm studying to be a cardio theoracic surgeon. I'm no OBGYN."

POW.POW.POW. People start to drop like flies and the pregnant is letting out the loudest screams.

"HELP THE LADY DI," I yelled.

She rushed over to the woman to offer assistance. I ran over to one woman who looked really old.

"You fucking ass holes! This lady looks 80 and you left a bullet in her shoulder!" I put pressure on the wound to stop the bleeding. Meanwhile, other people are hit too.

Geez. Now we DEFINITELY need a hospital. All of a sudden I hear a ticking sound. The bomb was about to set off. "POLICE. WE HAVE THE PLACE SURROUNDED." I sigh in relief, but its still a bomb about to go off. The bomb is at the 10 seconds mark. My heart is racing, the pregnant woman won't shut up and blood is everywhere.

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"POLICE. POLICE." The police burst in.

3

2

"Wahhhh. Wahhh." The baby is born

BOOM.