My Sister's Keeper

Chapter Seven Guilt

           I walk into my house and smell Pizza in the air from the local shop and then see Chris opening up the box and he grins. "Hey honey, I got you some pizza." He says and gives me a kiss on the cheek gently and it sends terrible pangs of guilt through me. "Thank you, you didn't have to do this." I mumble and then after we eat I sit and watch TV with him, trying not to think of Matt and the kiss. Really it confused me terribly. Then I feel his hand move up my leg and he looks at me.

                   "You wanna go upstairs?" I stand quickly. "I'm going to get in the shower okay? I got a head ache." I rush upstairs and strip, jumping into the shower. I wash todays events from my skin until I feel clean. I step out and grab my under ware and put it on with one of Chris's old work shirts and walk out with the front unbuttoned and sigh. "You look pretty sexy in that." Chris says and I jump turning around and find him laying on the bed in a sexual pose.

                 "You look gay, stop it." I say laying down next to him and he starts kissing my neck and I groan angrily. "You were a animal last night, you wanna go again?" I turn over to him and glare up at him. "You better be drunk, cause first off you were the one squealing like a little girl." I say and he laughs loudly and his lips smash onto mine. At first I wrap my  arms around his neck and close my eyes but then all I picture is Matt and I shove him away quickly. He looks at me with a hurt expression. "What's wrong, you never say no, are you okay?" I sit up and look at him.

                "I'm sleeping on the couch enjoy the bed." I say and grab my pillows and go to the couch and lay down, closing my eyes. After about a hour I hear him talking on the phone. "Yeah she said no! Bro this is terrible, do ya think she is okay?" He's on speaker phone so I can hear his friend too. "Bro she's going to crack soon, you should go out with Emily." I perk up a little. "Naw... Look I had a fun time with Emily two days ago but Ryan needs me." I feel a tear roll down my cheek and instantly feel broken.

                I think I should talk to him now. I walk into the room and he hangs up the phone. "Look Chris, I think we need to talk." I whisper and he sits down and I take his hand. "Did you cheat on me?" I whisper and right before he answers his phone starts buzzing on the other side of the bed. I grab it and see that she text him. "Are you coming over yet? Is she asleep?"  I quietly set it down and he nods slowly. "Why?" I ask and he looks at me. "Ryan... Everything has been crumbling around us, you've seem distracted with getting Cameron back. Sure i enjoy ya in bed but things have been bad lately."

                    I look at him and quietly say it. "This guy named Matt is in my dance class and he confessed he loved me today and, he kissed me." Chris looks at me and sighs. "Ryan, do you think we should take a break? We're not breaking up but I think we should take a break." "Please don't-" Then his phone keeps buzzing so I sigh. "Go... Go have fun with your f****** slut!" I yell and he gets up and rushes out as I break down into tears. I lay in bed crying for hours and for most of the morning. I am like two hours late for work and I hear someone open the door as I whimper. Then I feel someone sit me up and their warm arms wrap around me. I look up a little and see it's Matt. He looks down at me with concern and then I kiss him on the lips. At first he hesitates but his arms wrap around me tighter and I feel the pain washing away with this kiss and finally close my eyes, welcoming the fact that this will be my future. 

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