First of all...(BWWM)

Now or Never

Merry Christmas Eve !!!
Prepared for an update on Christmas(tomorrow!)

I didn't know what to do with the letter.It was 2:30.Carter should be home by now.I wonder if he has any ideas on how to move on with this.What if Ken isn't just talk?What if he does what he says he will?Then we will all be in danger.

I bit my lip.I paced back and forth as I try to come up with a solution to my current dilemma.

"Hey Yaz.What's up?"I heard Carter's voice.

Finally.

"Hey.I got a letter from Ken telling me to get ready to die.We need to find where he's staying immediately."I rushed feeling the panic rise in my throat.Nothing crazy has ever happened like this before since I became an officer a year ago.

"What!?!That fucker!Look I know that you want to find him and I get that but um...I have a final tomorrow.Which means I have to study.Which means I can't help.But maybe you can help me."

My mouth opened wide in shock.

He couldn't be serious.

"Why would I help you if your not helping me?"I asked,frustrated.

"I will help you just not today.I need some help with these study questions.Please?Tomorrow well go look at the houses together.I need you right now."Cater gave me the puppy dog face.

Ugh.

:3

"No you just need to move the decimal to the right twice."I pointed,showing Carter.

He sighed,marking his paper.I looked down at what he wrote.

"No!Look...the decimal can't be added because it doesn't need to be there.Move it to the right so it will be invisible. "I instructed,annoyed.

"Just like that?"He asked.

I nodded."Yes just like that."

Carter snickered.

"What?"I asked,confused.

"Thats something people say when they have sex."

I rolled my eyes but I could feel the heat creeping on my cheeks.

"Stop being so inappropriate and finish this.I have my own work to do y'know."

Carter smiled."Thats all you do.Don't you have friends or I don't know try dating?"

I was slightly hurt by his comment.

"I do have friends.Leslie is just one of them.And I don't date because I don't want to.Its my choice and I'm obligated to have one."

"Im not saying you don't but you need something because your lonely.You might not notice it but you are.And I don't like seeing you that way.So find someone to hang out with."

I didn't really like how straightforward he was being.Ever since he's been dating that Teresa girl.What has she done to sweet Carter?

"Thanks a lot Carter.I will defitnetly keep that in mind."I left the room fuming.

:3

He was right.I guess thats the reason I got so defensive.I am lonely more than I think.I...just want somebody to hold me and tell me its gonna be okay.My mom and dad are who knows where...my brother he's in the army I think, so I never see him.All my other relatives I don't know.I'm pretty quiet and keep to myself which is why I don't have much friends.But I always wanted someone special.

"Yaz?I'm sorry."I saw Carter leaning on the door frame.

I sighed,ignoring him.

"I don't know what happened.I guess I...I've always wanted to tell you that I should be the one to keep you company.Be your someone.I guess I was angry because I can't.Sorry.It was no excuse.I hope you forgive me.I guess I'll leave now."Carter turned on his heel but stopped when I said,

"Stay Carter.Don't go."

I didn't want to cry because I'm strong but I kept thinking about him saying how lonely I was.Which just shows how sad my life is.No one to share it with.Will I ever?

Carter came over to me and embraced me in a hug.I breathed in his scent.He smells so good.

"I hope that means you forgive me."He whispered in my hair.

I nodded,pulling away.I wanted to kiss him.I wanted to kiss him so bad.

"Do it then."I heard him whisper.Oh my lord did I say that out loud?

"Um...I...I didn't mean that"I tried to take it back.

"Dont even try."He shook his head in amusement.

"Im sorry just forget that.You have a girlfriend and I'm just nobody."I admitted truthfully.Wow I'm nobody.

"What!?!Do you even know what the hell your saying right now?Honestly cause I don't think you do!How can you be nobody?I care for you Yaz!A lot!Way more than I should!Your somebody .Maybe not to you but defitnetly to me.And if I wasnt seeing T right now Id probably say I wanna kiss you too."I heard how serious and angry he gotten when I said that.

It made me feel so upset because I wanted that.But I'm such a coward to get it.Idont want to be scared anymore.But its too late already.

"Just...don't forget that okay.I love you Yaz."he kissed my for head and left my room.

But it was just a friend love.And just a friendly kiss.Cause all we are is just friends.

Damn.I just got all deep and shit.Little longer today because you guys are awesome.
Comment what Yaz should do;-)
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Xoxo Nia