One of The Boys

17. My SandMan.

ATTENTION, HARUS DIBACA!!! ;

karena part 16 waktu itu kehapus setengah halaman, jadi ceritanya harus ditulis ulang dan ada bagian di part 16 yang ceritanya diubah. jadi, kalau misalnya waktu itu udah keburu baca part 16 sebelum di post ulang, i suggest you for read it again! sorry for that :/ thanks!

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"WE'RE FUCKING OVER!"

"NO WE CAN'T! I REALLY AM SORRY HARRY!" i said as my sobs become harder. i need him. i really need him.

"GO AWAY!" he scream, avoiding to see my eyes.

"NO!" i scream as loud as harry.

"I SAID GO AWAY YOU SLUT!"

"slut.." now my mind is messed up. no he didn't say that, did he?

"yes, slut." he said that. "go away from my fucking house because i wont to see a fucking whore on my door." i never thought it would be so hurt.

"fine." i surrender for making him stay. "i deserve this though." i said as i show my pain by a smile. i'm just a feet away from harry's door and right when i turn to facing him, he slams the door behind me with words that sounds honest;

"hope you're happy with your new boyfriend." wow. how amazing is my life right now. it was so pathetic of me when he didn't try to hold me back. oh my god, stupid jessie. why would he even wanted me to stay?

i go home by taxi and when i arrived at home i just go to my bedroom and changed my clothes to a sweatpants and harry's t-shirt that leaved like 3 months ago when he go to my house. after that, i let myself fall to my bed and started to cry myself out. i scream and bite my pillow, hope all the neighbors didn't hear me. i can't sleep at all. i just cry and cry. more tears, more sobs. its all dark here, i'm too tired for turning the lights on. it just the moon that lit my room. i see my phone and look at all picts that i took with harry since last year and i start to cry again. cry over my stupidness. i just want him back i want him to lay beside me and feel his curls tickling my skin. i want to feel his hand around my waist. i want him to say about old jokes thats always makes me laugh. i want to see his dimples, hear those deep but cute voice come out from his mouth, his pink lips.. but it looks like i was the one who messed up, i was the one who pushed him away. i swear i love him to death. i didn't even know why i kiss niall, but i just want harry lips on mine, not niall, not other boys.. just harry.

i finally sleep because i'm too tired for crying. and when i wake up this afternoon, i see my phone and louis, liam, zayn and the girls are sending me messages, asking me if it was happen, if i really broke up with harry, i bet they’re met harry already. they must be so confused because they just know about my relantionship 2 days ago and i'm broke up now. what surprised me, the boys from 5sos are asking the same question as well. they're become my close friend since the night i go to their concert. i see that niall was sending me messages too, but he didn't ask the same question. he just say sorry and those things. i don't care about the messages. answering those question wouldn't make harry stay with me, even when niall say sorry, it wouldn't get harry backs to me. but i reply his messages, i tell him that i was broke up with harry and that wasn't his fault, its completly my mistake, i tell niall that he was forgiven for kissing me and i tell him too that i was fine.

well, honestly i'm not fine at all. the next night, i keep crying just like the first night i lay in this bed. i'm not going anywhere from my bed, i only go to the bathroom when i wanted to pee, thats all. i only sleep for like 2 hours a day. when i wake up i just go crying and see another messages from the lads and girls. i'm not even bother to go to the kitchen for eat, i don't care about my starving stomach. i really look so pathetic, i have that dark circle around my eyes, my hair was tangled, and i look skinnier. i just need harry, i need him to fix this, to fix me and my tiny little heart.