XVII

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December 27 , 14:03

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

I should've written on your birthday. I should've written on Christmas. I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

I'm sorry, Louis.

But I love you. I love you so much.

Happy birthday. I wish you were here so I could've spent it with you.

Merry Christmas. I wish you were here so I could've also spent that with you.

A few people called to ask if I was alright on those days.

I wasn't honestly, but I told them I was.

Yes, I lied.

But that date is so soon, Louis. How could I be okay. It just keeps getting closer and closer.

I'm scared, honestly. I really am.

I'm sorry this entry doesn't make any sense. My mind is everywhere right now. I don't know why I decided to even write today.

I'll write to you again soon, okay?

Sorry this is so short.

.H

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