work together // cth

diciannove

DRoP DeAd

I finish up the last words on my essay, the first one anyway. I have so much goddamn homework to get done and such little time. It's okay, I'm okay- it's just that I hate college so much.

The television in my room is on, which is a really bad idea because I love Keeping Up With the Kardashians and they're playing reruns on E! But aside from that, I'm getting a considerable amount of work done, unbothered. Until my phone, that's laying next to me goes off.

I check it, my heart stopping in my chest and flying into my throat. Fuck. I forgot to change his name.

Calum 🐶❤️ is calling...

This is the first time he's called since we ended whatever we were. This is the first time he's ever tried to actually contact me and I wanted this. I wanted him to call me because I knew that it would change everything. He would call me some ridiculous pet name that I'd pretend to hate but actually loved so much and the way it made me flustered. Or he'd tell me he misses me or he could just be breathing. And I'd come running back.

Now I'm not too sure if I want to pick up the phone. I think of my mom and I know that I won't.

The phone call ends and soon after another notification pops up.

Calum 🐶❤️ voicemail (1)

I tear my eyes away from it and back to my work. I cringe as I see another notification pop up. And another and another.

Calum🐶❤️ voicemail (4)

I finally grab the phone and play the first voicemail. I put it up to my ear and listen to Calum's heavy breathing.

"...Grace..." Is the first thing that leaves his mouth, not a stupid pet name, but just my name. And it comes out softly, almost like a whisper. "...I miss you...M'sorry."

And then it ends, I quickly click onto the next one.

"I started smoking again...I'm sorry."

I didn't even notice he stopped. The next one: "...Please answer. I want to hear your voice."

My finger hovers over the next one, but I soon press it.

"I keep telling myself I won't call you, but I do. I keep fucking calling you....and leaving pointless messages because you won't answer" I listen to him closely, which is when I hear how he's slurring, "and I want you to pick up because-Ashton shut the fuck up...What was I going on about? Right. I want to hear your voice, lovely. I love your voice. I love when you sing in the shower, I want to be with you when you sing in the shower. That sounds wrong but I just...just want to hear you more without a door between us (a giggle) that still sounds wrong... I miss you and I miss your voice and that's so lame. But you're so cool because you swear a lot and you don't like me because I'm somewhat famous. I hate saying that."

"Anyway. You actually like me and you didn't ask me if I was Asian...Do you think I'm Asian? I'm not. I'm Kiwi and Scottish and I miss you" He sighs deeply, then hiccups, "okay. Love you, baby girl. Shit! You're probably sleeping. Call me back. I love you."

My hand is clasped over my mouth when the voicemail ends to stop the sobs coming from my mouth that accompany the tears streaming down my face. I try to muffle my sobs but I can't.