Fix Me

September

Sarah's POV

I remember the day he left for tour. It was a few days after the truth or dare incident. It's not like we're actually dating, but it felt so real for those few days, and now it's gone.

**flashback**

"Sarah! Sarah wake up." Josh shakes me awake. It's dark out and I groan at him.

"What time is it?" I sit up and glower at him. "My head hurts." I hold my head and he frowns a little, draging me out of bed.

"It's like 4:30. Come see this." He pulls me into the bathroom where there is a mess of condoms all over the place. I start to laugh, remembering what happened during the night. "Did we . . ?" He asks, genuinely concerned.

"No. No, you were really drunk and thought we should make the 'used condom' then." I smile and shake my head. "But then I felt like blowing them all up. We had a hell of a time."

"Oh thank god." He laughs in relief.

I smile at the memory, and I'm caught by Jessica, the other secretary. "What, or, probably more accurately, who are you thinking about?" She already knows that it's Josh, I can tell by the look on her face. It's the 'I'm sorry your boyfriend is away from the province for three months' look.

"Nothing, no one. When does Marianas Trench come back from tour, I need to file it." I lie, sweetly.

"October third." Jessica raises an eyebrow and I walk away, pretending to go to the filing room. October third . . . that's next week. The only reason I know that is because that's also my birthday. I'll be eighteen, maybe it will change things between Josh and I, but we already act like a couple. Everyone thinks that we are one, so it won't surprise me if we just make it official.

*****

I decide that, on the last day of the band's tour, I'll write a song. I've been a zombie since Jessica told me that today was the day. I pull out the key he gave me to his apartment and run upstairs. I unlock the door and I'm met with the smell of something awful. I plug my nose and walk into the kitchen, noticing that the garbage wasn't emptied before the band left. Ugh, come on Josh! I tie up the bag and throw it out the door, I'll take it out when I leave.

I go to his room and pull his guitar out from under his bed. I quickly tune it and strum a few chords.

It's the third of October, you should come over. Best laid plans are not sober. Maybe not the way we thought we planned, but both of us will take this hand, for a couple of days and then we'll disappear, we don't have to talk of where we'll go from here, oh, my dearly departed.

One final shoulder here before we're none, and then there were none. This last call could be all we can do for each other, embrace for a dear old friend, bring wine to bed we'll toast what could have been, my dearly departed. To, my dearly departed . . .

"Oh my god. What is that smell?" I hear Josh from the door. The other guys make grunting noises in response. I swiftly put the guitar under his bed with the chords for the song I wrote. I go into his dresser and pull out a large t-shirt, pulling the one I'm wearing off and sliding this one on.

"What, no kiss?" I shout from the bedroom, as I walk into the hallway.

"Hey boo!" Josh yells, runs towards me and picks me up, spinning around and kissing my head. "I missed you."

"And I you. Do you know what day it is?" I answer back as he sets me down. His face scrunches up as he thinks for a moment.

"The third of October? Which is -- oh my God, you're officially legal!" He whispers with shock on his face.

"Only if you want to," he presses his lips to mine, firmly and I wrap my arms around him. It's true, I've missed him so much, and I don't know if I can deal with him leaving for longer than three months.

"You have no idea what you do to me." Josh mumbles as he pulls away. I giggle and grab his hand.

"You saved me, and now I'll save you." I smile and walk him out to the living room.

"SARAH!" Matt yells when he sees me. "I missed you!" He's more eager to see me than Josh is. I laugh loudly and give the guys all a round of hugs.

"You know, Matt, if you were ever this excited about your girlfriend, then maybe you'd actually have a love life . . ." I poke fun and catch up with the guys. My life with them is only just beginning.