Diary of a Couch Potato (Cont.)

Chapter 13-"Picture Perfect" Family

Things have been tense in my house ever since Brian’s failed attempted to blackmail me out of befriending Archer and Sadie, but I’m not too fazed. I’ve been used to this before, and this time it’s no different.

For years, Brian has been making me do his bidding because he’s always held the cards in his favor. But not today. He’s down to his last card, but he knows he can’t play it because then he’ll lose the game. I’m betting on my brother’s pride because I know it’s too high for him to lose to such a beginner. He’ll try to dig some dirt on me before making his next move for sure.

 Brian and I made eye contact several times, but every time we did we stared down each other so hard you thought we were going to burn holes through our eye sockets.

Dad was seated besides me the whole time, his keen gaze going back and forth like he was trying to figure out what was going on, but as far as Mom was concerned, the only thing that mattered was that her family was seated down at the dinner table at seven o’ clock because her children are not some kind of savages, like say, a certain Skater Boy next door.

 ...Who just happened to be seated on the other side of dad because we made plans to go to the mall for his 1st makeover round, but before we had the chance to leave, my mom insisted he stay for a hot healthy meal because she was afraid I was going to go buy junk food for dinner at the mall when I’m finally losing some pounds.

 And for my mom, “sitting down for a hot healthy meal “ means an entire vegetarian buffet, complete with china, silver, candles, and elaborate floral. See my mom is a part-part-part-time PR consultant, and she specializes in interior design.

She was obsessed with transforming me into another one of her perfect offspring, because I’m not “sexy and sporty”, like Brian, or “Posh and Pretty” like my older sister, Cassandra, who used to compete in modeling competitions when she was around my age.

 If you ever looked at my family photos, you’ll notice I don’t seem like belong there. I’m the ugly duckling of the family. We are the perfect picture family, but I’m not part of the in-group.

 As usual no one said much to me through dinner: Brian, Dad and Mom just compared superb accomplishments and promotions, so I never really had much to say. I couldn’t exactly be upset about being ignored since my other option was to be enlightened about the ways I am physically and/or sartorially repulsive.

 Archer was equally left out. My mom didn’t say it out loud, but you can tell she only invited him to dinner because it was the courteous thing to do. If it were up to her personally, she would have let him eat outside on our front steps, with a carton box of chinese carryout, for all she cared. That's how lowly she felt about our neighbors, The Sloanes.

"Mother, something really great happened to me today! Can you believe that Townson, the pretigious basketball college, is scouting for players in our school! They're coming next week. Coach says I'm a shoe-in for their scholarships."

"That's great, Brian. Mind if you tell me more?" Then they launched into a animated conversation about pointers and such.

 “Mom.” I spoke up, 

 My mom either didn’t hear me or pretended not to. Her attention was all focused on Brian.

Archer chocked on his brocolli watching us. Brian gave Archer a quick disqusted look when he wasn't looking, then proceded his conversation with mom. I poked the peas on my plate nervously.

"Mom." I tried at it again, raising my voice. "I got an a A on my personal Essay test today. My teacher, Ms. Blackwell, really loved my writing style. In fact, she said she'd personally recommend me for the Newspaper Committe next year if I was interested--"