The Fandom Guide To Life

Meeting Internet Friends

Convincing your parents to let you meet internet friends.

If your parents don't know you have social media/whatever you're using to communicate with your friend, it may be easier to go from the beginning.
If your parents are decently comfortable and used to social media/who you talk to, you can skip the first few steps.

1- Ask your parents permission to get social media even if you already have it.
OR you can tell your parents that you've had social media. But they may be disappointed in you for a while for keeping a secret from them. That's why starting from the beginning may help.
Either way, don't get mad if your parents respond negatively. They're thinking about your safety and may not understand how much technology is a part of your life.

2-You have to build trust and that takes a while. Show that you know the risks and show how responsible you are. Then you may be able to bring it up again at another time.
Just don't wait too long or they'll ask why you brought it up suddenly and they'll explain how you lived without it before.

3-Once you are given the okay by whoever, continue to be responsible. Follow whatever rules you have to, to keep up the trust.

4-If your parents don't understand you, try to show them what you like. Of course, keep in mind how they would see it. Try to find something you can both like. Possibly a tv show or music genre.

5-Just casually mention things about your friends online that your parents may be interested in, too.
Like "Emma showed me this cool song. You might like it, too."
They'll say "Who's Emma?"
You can say "Oh, she lives in ---. We text through--- about this band. Have a listen."
They're more likely to respond with "Cool. Just remember to be smart online." Than "Oh what did I tell you about talking to strangers online?"
Don't make it seem like you depend on communication with your online friend because they may take that away. They'll say "This person is bad for you. They could be lying to you."

6-Before you present a case to your parents, check it out yourself.
Make sure you know who you're talking to. Just to be safe. It may take a while and a little investigation. Talk to others who have been talking to your internet friend, too. If possible. If their thoughts about your friend are the same as yours, that's good.
You don't want to present a friend that will lower your chances of being able to meet them.
(You should always be yourself and let your friend be their self but you may need to be on your best behaviour to persuade your parents.)

7-Skype or facetime. This will give evidence that they're real and committed to your friendship. Friendship is not a one way thing. Snapchat is also easier to tell if the person you're talking to is real or not.

8-Give it some time of being really close with your friend and having your family comfortable with the fact that you have an internet friend.

9-Make sure your friend is on the same page. Their parents should be okay with your friendship, too.

10-It's a long process but then you can bring up wanting to meet them. Have details planned before hand. Like location of meeting, who's going with you. Pick somewhere safe and have someone with you. Or at least tell someone and have a phone. You can always back out and plan a different day.
Make sure it's not going to interfere with anything important like school or family related.

Sometimes it's easier to find a place, like a convention or an event, that you'll both be attending and meet there. It's usually a safe spot. It's not going behind your parents back if you both happen to be there in a public place. Just be careful of who you're giving your location to.

Don't give up hope. It may take until you're old enough to travel alone. But by then, you'll really know if you actually want to meet that person or not.l

I've never met an internet friend. I think it would be really cool. Please be careful. Because I'm sure we all know people who have lied to us directly or not. I always think about whether my friendships are real or if I just like the idea of talking to people... ? ~M