A/N; A HUNDRED CHAPTERS! Crazy!
I want as many name suggestions for the girl as possible please!
Enjoy!
Es xo
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Today wasn't a particularly good day for Carrie-Ann. She knew pregnancy brought many highs and lows, and today she was feeling low.
She slept in because she had trouble sleeping. She was now almost five months pregnant. Her bump wasn't huge but it was starting to cause small issues, she was finding it hard to sleep, her cravings meant she was putting on a lot of weight and all in all she just felt disgusting.
When she woke, Harry was gone. She had spent a few mornings alone in London now, it was almost routine. Although it didn't make her upset, she still missed waking up to him sometimes.
Being in London itself was tough for her, she hadn't fully moved over yet, she just somehow stayed there since Christmas. She had gotten her visa and legal documents sorted so she was basically a citizen now, just without all her stuff.
She missed Tanya and Natalie. Tanya had resigned from working as Carrie-Ann's PA to work for a law firm, Natalie was still her makeup artist but she hadn't needed her. They would all Skype but it was inconsistent.
The only other friends Carrie-Ann had was Lou and Gemma. The girls had been lovely to her, welcoming her in and treating her as if she's always been a friend, but Carrie-Ann hated being a burden. And didn't want them to feel like they had to include the fat pregnant girl in everything.
Carrie-Ann had a few more pages left of her book left with only nine days until the deadline. She felt confident with it, the positive of feeling so low and alone was that she could throw herself into her work.
She had also been able to meet up with Burberry again for meetings now that she was in London, they were even generous enough to shower her with Burberry gifts for the baby.
That was another thing too, ever since announcing the pregnancy her life had been even more under the microscope than usual. She couldn't go anywhere without being found. She found it suffocating and intimidating. She was being sent things from friends of friends and designers from all of the world, she appreciated it all to no end - but she also wanted to buy her own stuff and not just get handed it.
She had just received an email from the book agency she was working with. They were trying to come up with dates for her to do a book tour, if she did well in the US they wanted to bring it over to the UK too. Her PR also wanted to get her doing appearances and talk shows to get her book out there.
But Carrie-Ann felt scared. She was five months pregnant, she'd only be getting bigger and bigger. How the hell would she tour and do appearances?
"Hey babe," Harry kissed her forehead, it was 4pm and he had just got back.
Even though he was always gone in the morning and out all day he always made sure to be back for the evening, he was always back to make dinner.
"Hey," She didn't look up, too concentrated on her laptop.
"Good day?"
"Mmm, you?"
"Yeah it was alright," He took his boots off and sat beside her. "What have you been up to?"
"Emails and writing, the usual."
Harry was starting to get used to this sort of mood, he hated it but he also understood. Carrie-Ann wouldn't be like this forever, she was just stressed.
"What would you like for dinner?"
She shrugs. "Anything,"
"What's going on Caz?" Harry relents.
She shakes her head wiping her eyes, she was exhausted. "Nothing, it's fine."
"No it's not fine," His voice was calm. "You're visibly exhausted and I want to know what's going on."
"I have a million and one things to deal with,"
"How can I help you?"
She opens up another email. "You can't,"
"Don't push me out, try me. Tell me what you're stressing about."
"First of all I've got to move my stuff from one country to another, then my book agency want me to do all of these signings and tours and appearances, I have to handle being pregnant which alone is hard, I can't step outside without being hounded. It's all too much,"
"Well, I can sort out moving your stuff over here?"
She thought for a moment. "I'm not sure,"
"I was also thinking that, maybe when the baby comes.."
Carrie-Ann looked at him, prepared for whatever he had to say.
"..Maybe we should get a nanny,"
"No, absolutely not." Was her instant reply.
"Have you even thought about it? We're still busy people and-"
"I would rather give up my whole life for this child than hire a nanny. It's not happening."
"And why not? It'll be so helpful for us-"
"I was raised for fifteen years by nannies." She cuts him off. "I spent time with my parents one day a week, the rest of the time I was with Laura or Valencia or Carmen. Whichever was our nanny. Every year we'd get a new nanny and every year it was someone new, someone to get attached to only to lose a year later. I spent my childhood doing activities with nannies and never actually being able to think of a game I've ever played with my father. So if you think I want that for my daughter, you thought wrong."
Harry hadn't thought of it that way, he innocently thought that it would be help for them both, he never thought about her childhood.
"Caz-"
"I'm going for a bath," She announces shutting her laptop and leaving the livingroom.
As she soaked in the bath, she began to cry. She wasn't sure as to why she was crying exactly but from the pregnancy books and blogs she'd been reading said it was completely normal and okay for her to randomly cry.
She hears a faint knock at the door before Harry walked in carefully. He was holding a tray.
She felt guilty for the sheepish look he had on his face, not wanting him to walk on egg shells around her because of her outbursts.
"I've brought you some juice, and ice cream - I know you've been craving it lately."
She smiles up at him. "Thank you, you're the sweetest. I don't really deserve this."
"Of course you do," He sat on the stoop beside the bath. "You're practically half way through your pregnancy, you should be slowing down and letting me do things for you. Getting stressed is not good for you,"
She began to cry again, she had no idea why she was she just felt like it.
"You're right,"
"You have to tell me about your worries otherwise I can't help you."
She sniffled.
He kissed her cheek. "You relax, I'm going to sort out getting your stuff over here. Relax, right?"
She nods.
He takes her phone. "You won't relax with this, I'll look after it."
She pouts.
"Love you,"
She smiles. "I love you too."
