The darkest path, the walking dead

Chapter 19: tragic turn of events

The bullet graze still hurts but I don't mind it anymore, I remember days would go by where I was thinking maybe I'm a walker but the pain of the bullet reminds me that I'm human and so does Carl, I care about him and even if that scares me more than a hungry herd of walkers I am determined to let him be there for me, I'm not going to push him away because I'm sick of being scared to care for people and if Carl dies because of me I will not be able to live and I know that so I'm making it my job to protect him with my life. Lucas is getting better but he still talks to thin air like Sophia's still there but no one has been game enough to tell him that he's crazy especially not be because I'm as crazy as he is, I don't talk to her but I see not just in my dreams anymore but I see her in a reflection of a mirror or water, I see her in the corner of my eye, I see her everywhere and it's getting worse. It's been eight days since I me and Carl kissed and it's funny I thought it would make me push him away more but now I just want to spend more time with him than before so that's a good thing, I also thought it would make things awkward and that he would be angry but it's not and he is not angry with me so that's a good thing two. I've spent the last eight day doing nothing very exciting I have spent most of the time keeping an eye on the kid we bought back he is getting better and today some of us will be taking him out and letting him go, I think it's a bad idea but it's not my decision. So all I've done lately is hang out with Carl or sometimes Lucas who is still calling me tinkerbell by the way, Carl doesn't like me being around Lucas and he doesn't like the nickname but I told him he doesn't get to pick my friends and I also told him that I don't have much say in them myself in this world there's not much to chose from, he agreed but he doesn't trust Lucas, the only other thing I've done is watch the kid and I went hunting with Daryl once or twice and he showed me he basics. I also found out by Lucas's random conversations he has with himself that there was a reason Sophia and I got along so well, Lucas thinks that's because we where both abused but I don't know if I believe that's why we got along, I also have no idea how he found that out but I think he just guessed or maybe he can tell. I walk across the field to Carl wearing a big smile. Carl stands near rick and Shane he isn't smile he looks worried, they haven't seen me yet so I use that to my advantage.
"Please don't ask her to come dad please she's still a mess" Carl States and I get the feeling there talking about me which I do not appreciate.
"Carl I know but she's the only one who knows how to use a gun and defend herself" Shane says and I smirk a little as I inch closer.
"Can't you just go on your own?" Carl asks.
"No Carl, if we get into trouble then we will need someone to have our back and besides you can't treat her like she a baby" rick states and I roll my eyes, oh yeah I can do that again it took a while but I can use my eye properly again, you can still see a faint bruise but it's fading slowly.
"She's not ready to go out there, last time you where stupid enough to go out there with her she got shot!" Carl almost yells, there defiantly talking about me.
"Carl stop treating me like I'm four" I say and they look at me in shock "I'm in where are we going" I smile and Carl looks at me with a mixture of sadness and panic.
"Please Luna do-" Carl starts and I put my finger up to him.
"Shhhh" I say and he puts one hand to his head and takes a beep breathe.
"So where are we going?" I ask and Rick answers finally.
"We are taking Randell away" Rick says and I nod.
"Yeah thought so" I nod.
"Just let me get my bow and arrows" I skip away and Carl follows me into the RV.
"Please don't go" he begs as I search for my bow and arrows.
"Carl I have to do this" I say not looking at him.
"No you don't they can handle themselves" Carl say and I nod.
"Yeah probably but I'm not going for them I'm going for me, I'm going to go crazy in this hell hole" I look at him as I put my catquiver on my back and do the same with my bow.
"What is it that back spending time with me" Carl snaps and I feel bad instantly.
"No I love spending time with you but you know I hate this farm and you know why" I say as I hug him and he nods, I had told him a few days ago that this farm reminds me of my life before and he understood why I don't like it, Carl is so understanding.
"Sorry it's just I don't want you it get hurt" He say and I nods.
"I'll be fine I always am" I smile at him and kiss him on the check, he is a little taller that me so I have to stand on tiptoes.
"You sure you have to go?" He asks and I nod.
"But I'm also sure I will come back in one piece" I smile at him and he nods, I hear a car horn and I figure it's rick and Shane telling me to hurry up.
"This farm will make you weak if you let it and I'm not letting it" I kiss him on the lips for a second before running out of the RV.
"Bye Carl" I yell behind me. I get into the car and we start driving, it's silent for a while which is totally fine with me but Rick breaks the silence.
"So you and Carl hu?" He laughs and so does Shane, I roll my eyes and don't answer but after a second my smart ass mouth get the better of me.
"So you and Andrea hu Shane?" I ask and Shane turn red in the face as he blushes slightly in embarrassment, rick looks confused.
"I've seen the looks she gives you" I say smirking.
"That is none of your business" he snaps and I laugh.
"How have I not noticed this?" Rick say to Shane but I answer.
"I think is just me and dale who noticed, Rick I'm very observant I notice things I shouldn't" I smirk and Rick nods.
"I've noticed" he says and I look out the window.
"Carls worried about you, are you ok?" Rick asks me and I sigh.
"I always am" I lie.
"Did your uncle really abuse you?" Rick asks and I nod
"Am I missing something?" Shane asks and I shake my head.
"No nothing important" I sigh.
"Does Carl know?" Rick asks and I nod.
"He found out after you" I say and Rick nods.
"So what's this about you and Andrea Shane?" Rick asks and Shane shakes his head.
"Nothing it was a one time thing" Shane says and rick nods, we drive in silence for about twenty minutes when rick stops the car and gets out and so do I but I don't know why, Shane follows and rick walks down the road a few metres.
"Luna me and Shane need to talk go back to the car" rick tells me and I roll my eyes.
"You know I'm going to be able to hear you from there right? I might as well stay" I say and rick sighs but doesn't object.
"I want to talk, I've been waiting a week till we where going to do this, I just want to talk" rick shrugs.
"We don't need to" Shane says and I don't believe him.
"We do" rick objects and I know he didn't believe Shane just like me.
"No we don't" Shane say looking at Rick.
"We are going this I get it, he was passed out when you two bought him to the farm he doesn't know where the farm is" Shane says.
"That isn't what I need to talk to you about and I think I need to talk to both of you" Rick says looking at me and Shane, I swallow hard I think we are in trouble.
"I heard what really happened at the school" rick say and I freeze because I'm still not really sure what happened.
"Was it to survive? Which one of you killed him?" Rick ask
"Yeah, she wasn't even there I left her" Shane points to me "one of us wasn't going to make it out and it had to be him" he says.
"One shot to the leg Lucas lives reality is he had no business being here" Shane says, rick nods.
"I saw him die" I swallowed looking at the ground, Rick is silent.
"You don't think I would have done it?" Rick asks and I look up in shock.
"No I know you wouldn't have" Shane says and I want to agree.
"I would do anything to keep my family, my group safe, I would do anything to save them and my baby, is it going to have to be me two?" Rick asks.
"Rick you can't be the good guy and expect to live" Shane tells him and I also agree with that, I never thought I would agree with Shane so manny time in one conversation.
"Not anymore" Shane shakes his head.
"I'm not the good guy anymore, to have my family's alive I will do anything, anything. Now Lori says your dangers but your not going to be dangers no to us, not to me, not to Luna, not anymore. How about you look at me?" Rick ask and I have also noticed that Shane wouldn't look at Rick.
"You and Lori I get what happened, when I figured it out and I fingered it out pretty quickly I wanted to break your jaw, let you choke on your teeth but I didn't, that wasn't weakness that took everything, that is my wife, my son, my unborn child and I will stay alive to keep them alive, you don't love her you think you do but you don't and the only way you and I keep on is that you expect what I just said right here right now and we move forwards with that understanding" Rick begin to walk away and I follow, Shane says something to rick but I don't stay behind I just and get in the back seat of the car and wait. They go and check to see if Randell is still tied up tightly, they come back without any trouble so I say things are ok. We get in the car and start driving ricks the one to talk.
"We need to start using out knifes more, if it's just one walker we use our knifes and we keep things quiet, we save ammunition" Rick says and I nod.
"I've got no problem with that I already do that" I pointed out and rick nods.
"Yeah I know you do, you must have figured this thing out pretty quickly I mean you figured out noise draws them and you are still so young, you figured out that if you cover your self in there blood they can't smell you" Rick says and I smile.
"The only problem is I don't think I will ever smell the same" I laughed and so did rick. The boys stark talking about some stuff that doesn't seem to important to me so I drift into a kind of daydream, I think about Carl mostly and what he would do if he ever saw the few scars on my wrist, he can never know. Rick is taking about his cousin and I watch Shane watch a walker, I don't like Shane and I will never trust him and if push comes to shove I will kill him without a second thought. It's been about twenty minutes and a few conversation which I didn't listen to. We stop at a fenced of building that actually looks safe, Randell is lucky that Rick is a good person, I know both me and Shane would have left him somewhere that isn't that safe but to be honest both me and Shane would have never pulled his leg of that fence.
"This will do" Rick says as Shane leans against the fence, I pull my bow from my back and load an arrow.
"We will leave the boy here and scavenge some supplies" Rick says and I don't argue.
"Walker" I say nodding towards the walker on the other side of the fence. It's a cop and I can tell that Rick has mixed emotions about that. Shane pulls out him gun and I stop him.
"We use knifes remember" I say and Rick smirks at me. Rick cuts his finger and puts blood on the fence making the walker frantic to get to us, the walker stumbles towards us as fast as he can. The walker hits the fence and pushes him face into in as he licks the blood. Rick stabs it though the scull and twists the knife before pulling it out.
"Guns are quick and easy but there are other ways to do things" rick states and I nod.
"There's one more" Rick says and I quickly go to the fence, Shane is cutting his finger opened when I jump over the fence.
"Luna! What are you doing?!?" Rick yells and as I pull the arrow back sending it flying into the walkers head.
"Kids tough" Shane laughs as I climb back over the fence.
"Sorry but there are other ways to do this" I say and rick rolls his eyes but smiles. They cut the chains of the gate and we forward in, I keep my bow ready with an arrow loaded but nothing seems to be here, there are cans across the ground and I figure people where here. I'm the first to wonder deeper into the yard to see body's, there burnt and dead I can't tell if they where walkers or people before they where burnt, I can tell some had been eaten because all that remained of some body's are the torso and head, I wonder how they all died? Was it a walker? Was it quick? I push the thoughts out of my head and convince myself that it doesn't mater. We and rick stare at the body's while Shane enters a bus. Rick begins to talk to Shane and I wonder away looking at other things, there's not much here and when I go back to Shane and Rick there getting Randell out of the car. We push Randell down onto his knees and pull the cover from his head and take the air phones from his ears.
"What kind of place is this?" Randell asks confused.
"Oh come on please! I owe you guys" Randell begs us to take him back with us as we start to walk away but I don't care what happened to him now we saved his life already.
"I can help you protect what you got" he begs
"Why would you save my life just to kill me by leaving me here?" He yells as we walk further away "one guy, one guy can't make it alone. That's why I was with them guys I was alone!" Randell yell but I disagree with him I survived on my own.  rick places a knife down that Randell can use to cut the ties from his ankles and wrists. It will take him a little bit to get to the knife though and defiantly enough time for us to escape if we hurry. I can hear Randell's panicked breaths from behind me.
"Don't be stupid I'm not like them I'm just some guy, I used to watch football and screw around on the internet. I lived with my mum I lost her like you lost people, I went to school with Maggie for god sakes!" He yells and I freeze and I turn and walk towards him with my bow aimed at him.
"What did you just say" I yelled at him.
"Answer her question" Shane yelled and we all stand in front of him, he now lays on his stomach.
"She didn't know me, didn't even know I existed, I mean I know her and I knew who her dad was, there is no way I would do anything to hurt her or her family" Randell says the boys start to walk away talking about what to do but I stayed in front of him with my bow aimed at him.
"Or you or your people, I'm not like the guys I was with."
"Shane no!" Rick yells and I gun fires almost hitting me but I don't flinch I just keep my eyes on Randell.
"Don't let them kill me please little girl" he begs and I roll my eyes.
"Shut up" I growl and he swallows hard.
"Please don't" Randell is almost crying now but I don't care.
"Shut up!" This time it's rick. I can hear rick and Shane yelling about something but I just keep looking at Randell. I turn back when I hear rick and Shane fighting, rick is on the ground and Shane grabs him gun.
"STOP IT" I scream running over to them, as Shane pushes rick on top of a car, Shane elbows me in the gut and I fall over backwards getting the wind knocked out of me, I turn my head to see Randell pulling himself towards the knife. I pull myself to my feet and kick Randell in the ribs making him gasp for air. I kick the knife further away from Randell and turn to see Shane pushing a motorcycle on top of rick. I run toward them but Shane slaps me across the face and pushes me over the motorcycle, I fall on the motorcycle and land near rick who is trying to get the motorcycle of himself so I stand and pull it of him and rick runs toward Shane who is walking towards Randell with a gun. Rick grabs Shane and Shane falls to the ground with Rick next to him, Shane lays on rick with his back on rick who still has him from behind, they fight on the ground like that and I don't know what to do, I could help rick or I could help Shane kill Randell, I could help Randell escape or stand here and let this fold out in front of me. I want Randell dead as much as Shane but I have to help rick because I don't want Carl to have to loose anyone I want him to say the one who is always so bright and happy. I kick Shane in the ribs and he fall of rick with rick on top of him, rick punches shane in the face multiple times before standing up and leaving Shane on the ground.
"Your not doing this!" Rick yells at Shane as he gets up "you don't get to make these calls anymore I wont let you" rick says. Shane grads a large wrench from behind him.
"Let me do this or I'll kill Luna" Shane says and I freeze.
"Shane you wont do thi-" he's cuts of because Shane hauls the large wrench into the air towards me, I scream and drop to the ground covering my head with my arms, it hits a window behind me and it smashes as glass falls on me. I breath heavily as I look at Shane and then at my catquiver and bow which I left when I kicked Shane. I push myself up as soon as I see the walkers hand appear, it falls but I moved away to fast for it to land on me. Rick stabs it once in the neck and then in the head. I hear more glass breaking as dozens of walkers pile out of the building. The first thing I do is check that Rick is safe, he hides under the dead walker. I then dart for my catquiver and bow but I'm cut off my the walkers and I have no choice but to leave my stuff and run the other way and Shane follows with all the walkers behind him. I run into a school bus and Shane follows me, oh no. Me and Shane force the door closed and lean on it, putting all my weight on it to keep it closed doesn't sound hard but it is when there's two of you and about thirteen of them.
"We wont both make it out of this alive" Shane says and I feel sick, I wonder if Otis felt sick before Shane killed him.
"What you going to kill me like you killed Otis leave me for walker food?" I ask and I'm not joking I think this is what he will do.
"I'm thinking about it" he growls.
"Got to hell dickface what do you think Carl will think when you get back and have to tell him that you killed his...." I'm not sure what to call it was I his girlfriend?
"See your nothing to him just another pear of boobs" Shane laughs and I slam my foot into him making him wince.
"You little bitch" while keeping his weight on the door he grabbed me and punched me. I fell to the ground he cuts his hand and wipes it on the door and stabs the walker in the head, I don't know where Rick is but he doesn't look like he is going to help. Shane looses his knife and looks around in panic, I'm still on the ground and I don't want to get up. Shane grabs a walking stick and puts it across the door preventing it from opening, I know it won't hold for long, Shane rushes to the back of the bus and tries to open the door but it's locked and there is no key in sight. We both realise there's no escape at the same time and look at each other, he looks at me in a kind of hunger and I know I'm probably going to turn out like Otis and I look at him with fear.
"Rick!" I Scream pulling myself away from Shane.
"Rick!" I cry but no one comes, he's probably chasing Randell or maybe he left us. Shane starts towards me and I scream again.
"Scream all you want it will just draw more walkers" he smirks. He grabs my leg and I grab the seat, he pulls harder and I loose my grip on the seat.
"Rick help!" I cry. Shane pulls me towards the door and is about to throw me out when a car drives past and starts shooting the walks there's an opening and we push the door open and run for the car, I'm still crying and when I get in the car rick knows something happened. Randell's driving and rick sits in the front seat, me and Shane in the back. I sob into my knees unable to breath properly let alone answer ricks questions.
"What's wrong Luna? Shane what did you do!" Rick yells but he can't get an answer out of me or Shane, I sob into my knees the hole way home and I'm not looking forward to the conversation I'm about to have with Carl, Daryl and Lucas. Daryl will tell me to stop going on run because I'm to reckless and can't be trusted, Lucas will go further into what ever state he is in and Carl will be the worst he will worry about me and I don't think I remember how it is to have someone worry about me. I'm still sobbing when we get back home. Rick takes Randell from the back seat and to be honest I don't remember them stoping to put him in there and Shane storms of swearing under him breath but I can't move all I can do is sob into my knees, I can't breath properly and my hands are shaking as if they where leaves getting attacked by a hair dryer. I see Carl and Daryl approaching in the distance and they stop and talk to Rick, I know there talking about me but I don't know what there saying there to far away, I see Daryl and Carl both heading towards me and I wish I could stop sobbing and pull myself together but it's as if I left some pieces back in the bus and now I can't pull myself together because I'm missing pieces. I hear the door open and I fell the cold wind blow. I feel strong arms wrap around me as I cry into Daryl's chest.
"What happened Luna?" Carl asks but I can't answer. I can't breath properly. I can't even find the head space to stop sobbing. I just can't. Daryl and Carl take me to my tent and put me down on my sleeping bag, they don't say anything they just watch me sob and try to
breath, they don't leave me all night and we all fall asleep that way, I wake up about four times screaming that night and I only slept for about three hours, I didn't want Carl to see me wake up like that but I couldn't tell him to leave, Daryl told him he could go back to his parents at least five times last night but he wouldn't leave, I also think he's angry at Rick and I don't know how much he knows about what Shane did but if he does know he won't want to be anywhere near Shane for a while. Carl tried to sit next to me and comfort me but it would just make me panic more, I couldn't stop thinking about how close Shane was to using me as walker bait. Even know I can a mess and I won't let them sit next to me without hyperventilating the two of them stayed by my side the hole night they don't leave the tent for anything other than to pee and I will never forget that.