This time around

"please, dont do that to yourself"

(I'm trying something new with this,so bear with if it's terrible)

Calums pov.

"I CANT DO THIS CALUM!!!!!" she shouted at me. Eyes pouring with tears, making her mascara run.

It broke my heart seeing Perrie like this. She was such a strong person, such a happy person. But now she was the opposite. And Michael. He used to be such a caring person but now...I hardly ever see him. He goes out almost every night or just mopes around his house and talking to him ends in a fight.

"Please baby,calm down, you need to calm down" I said softly moving closer to her and holding her shaking hands.

She shock her head, "I miss her too much,it hurts too much! It shouldn't have happened!" She said raising her voice.

It was like she was reliving every second of the trauma we went through.

"Please baby,stop it." I said holding her weak body and rubbing her back, "you need to stop" I whispered softly.

"It's all my fault." She sighed. "She trusted me,I was like her big sister,I was supposed to protect her calum!" She sighed and I held her tighter.

"Shhh,shhh. Please don't do this to yourself baby" I whispered. "But" she sighed and started sobbing into my chest. "Shhh, you need to sleep. You need to rest,it will all feel better after you sleep" I coed holding her hand and leading her to our bed even though I knew nothing could get rid of the pain she was feeling.

Because I had tried almost everything but nothing worked.

As soon as her head hit the pillow she fell asleep. I slipped in next to her and hold her close to me. I closed my eyes and I imediently thought of April. I missed her. More than anything in the world and I would do anything to get her back.

I'm not gonna try and think what would've happened if none of this happened or ask why because I've been there and done that and it really doesn't work.

I know lukes trying but I really hope he's going to make her remember soon because I'm not sure how much I can take of this.

Michaels pov.

I sighed and turned the TV channel over.

There was nothing but crap on the TV.

I was so bored.

I wasn't always like this. Normally, I would be out with Perrie,calum,luke and...April.

Wow. It feels weird to even think about her. I try no to because it felt to painful. To many memories. To many happy memories that are lost. Luke told me she was here about a week ago and he was going to make her remember. At first I laughed.

Too long. She can't remember now. She forgot us and there's nothing we can do about it. I realised that along time ago,I stopped kidding myself.

Getting theirs hopes up is only gonna make them more upset in the end.

I've done that.

Told myself she will remember.

But she won't.

It's no use.

Only made me more upset and that's why I'm in the state I'm in now.

I'm not saying this is Aprils fault. I'm not saying its anyone's fault.

It's my fault I'm in this state and no one  else's.

Lukes pov.

I pulled out the box from my wordrobe and sat on the floor cross legged. I pulled out one of my favirate pictures of me and April. We were in a tree house we used to go after school to spend with each other and one time the guys busted us. Perrie started taking loads of pictures and she took one of me and April.

April was sitting on my lap and we were holding hands. She was looking into my eyes and smiling like I was. She was so beautiful then. I had my black skinny jeans and some old T-shirt on but she had a blue skirt and a white T-shirt. Everyone always thought it would never work but we proved them wrong. They thought there's to many differences. Kelly wouldn't let her see me. Said I was a bad influence. But that didn't stop us...well until...

"What's that?" I heard April say behind me. I quickly whipped my head around in shock because she was so quiet and I didn't know she was there. She walked forward and her eyes widened as she looked down at the picture. "Is that...is that me?" She asked. "April are you okay?" I asked noticing she was starting to shake.

I walked towards her but she took a step back. I don't think I've been hurt so much in my life. "Luke. You didn't answer my question. Is it me in that photo?" She said again her eyes tearing up. I sighed and looked down but nodded. "But...but how? How could've I...what?" She blurted out running her hand along her hair. She looked up at me."luke" her voice cracked abit. "What's going on?" She looked so confused like she was going to cry.

I held out my hand for her and she slowly took it and then I could feel her body shaking. I led her to the bed so we could both sit down. "Are you sure you want to know?" I asked. I took awhile but she slowly nodded. I let out a deep sigh, where was I supposed to start. "Well, the picture was taken about a year ago or something." I shrugged as I couldn't remember all the details. "And, well there's no easy way or saying this so I'm just gonna say...we were together" I said feeling a lump in my throat.

"What, as in like a couple?" April asked quietly and I nodded. "But,there was a car accident" I said quietly trying not to cry. "Was anyone hurt?" She asked. I nodded. "It was only us two in the car...you were on the side that got hit. You were in a coma for months and when you woke up...you forget about me" by this time Aprils eyes were watering and I was struggling not to cry. "So, I forgot you" she said almost in a whisper. I nodded. "But it wasn't your fault" I quickly assured her.

"B-but this doesn't make sense,what about Kelly, what happened? H-how could have I forgotten you?" She asked frantically. "This makes no sense" she sighed placing her head in her hands. "I forgot you" she sighed. "How could I have forgotten you luke. I still can't remember. I'm so sorry. Why can't I remember?" She said now crying. "It's not your fault April" I sighed rubbing her back soothingly. "It is though, I forgot you...and them...how could I forget my best friends..." She blurted out,she was now standing and pacing the room crying uncontrollably.

I raced up to her and took her in my arms and she imediently wrapped her arms around my back. "Please don't do this to yourself, I hate seeing you so upset April. I've got you back now and I'm gonna help you remember okay" I coed and she nodded as I rocked. It seemed to calm her down but she was still crying abit. "No ones gonna take you away from me this time" I whispered.

And I meant it.

No one is going to take her away from me this time around...

Noone

Yay!!!!!!! She finally knows!!!!!!! I'm sooooo happy!!!!!!!!! Ik,ik,I write it but still...SHE KNOWS!!!

well,I love u guys!!!!!
Hugs+kisses
Molly