This time around

me,myself and i...ruined it

Aprils pov.

Calum looked at us and smiled softly then walked slowly up to Perrie bending down infront of her. He held her hands softly causing her to suddenly look up at him, "hey baby, there's some people here to see you" he whispered softly and she looked up at me and luke. Her eyes seemed to widen abit and she let out a long breathe.

Calum looked over at us and smiled, gently helping Perrie up. They walked towards us slowly, Perrie not taking her eyes off of me. "Hey Perrie" luke smiled. "Hi" she said,her eyes resting on luke for a second and then back to me again. "Hi April" she whispered and smiled when she said my name. "Hi" I whispered, smiling abit and found myself gripping lukes hand even more than I already was.

"You've grown so much" she sighed studying me. "Your so beautiful" she smiled and brushed a bit of my hair out of my hair. "Thanks" I blushed, "your very beautiful aswell" I said and she smiled letting her hand fall down. "C'mon, let's sit down" calum said and led Perrie to the sofa and luke led me to the seats aswell. Once we were all sat down, Perrie broke the silence, "so,what have you been doing in England then?" Perrie asked and calum let out a deep sighed,he looked quite worried.

"Um, well,nothing that exciting really" I shrugged. "How's school?" She asked. "Okay,i was studying drama and directing" I told her. She smiled brightly, "you always said you wanted to be a actress" she said. "You used to talk about it all the time" calum laughed softly causing me to blush abit. "Really?" I asked and he nodded whilst Perrie looked crushed, maybe I shouldn't have asked.

Calum gripped Perrie's hand and whispered something in her ear. "Yeah,you really loved drama...and luke" calum finished of his sentence then looked really guilty straight away. "Its okay" luke shrugged. He looked down at me and smiled,"I'm gonna make her remember" he whispered and I smiled. I leaned back and he wrapped his hands around my body. Perrie looked at us and sighed happily,"just like it used to be" she whispered and calum smiled and kissed her on the cheek.

"Um,so, do you like...um, remember anything?" She whispered. "Um,i-i, um" I stuttured. "Hey,it's okay" luke whispered pulling me closer and  wrapped my arms around him tighter. "She has nightmares about the crash and she has dreams sometimes, about you guys" luke said. "Really?" Perrie asked and she sounded excited. I nodded but I couldn't get any sound out of my mouth maybe because I was so nervous.

"So, maybe we could see each other tomorrow?" Perrie asked and luke nodded. "Course...maybe we could see if Michaels wants to come out with us" luke said hopefully. Calum sighed at the mention of Michaels name. "What's the matter?" I asked confused. He let out another sigh,"since the...crash, Michaels just locked himself away, I've tried, but..." Calum stopped talking and then just shrugged.

"Well, maybe me and April could go see him? Maybe he'll change his mind if he sees April?" Luke shrugged. Calum nodded slowly, "that might actually work" he smiled. "So, where could we go tomorrow?" I asked. Perries eyes lit up and she sat up straight, "I know! There's the fair, we went like ages ago." She squeeled. "What when Michael got candy floss stuck in his hair and April feel asleep on luke at the beach" calum laughed and Perrie laughed, nodding.

I smiled seeing them happy and let out small yawn. "Oh,I better get you home baby" luke sighed getting up and I got up aswell. "We're show you out" Perrie said quickly and led us to the door. When we got there, calum opened the door and luke said goodbye then went to the car to give us some space and a chance for Perrie to say goodbye to me. "Well, it was nice seeing you" calum sighed. "You two" I nodded. This whole thing just felt awkward. "I'll leave you girls to it" he smiled and walked away.

"Oh" Perrie sighed. "Bye then April" she sighed. She suddenly hugged me tightly. I smiled and hugged back, "bye Perrie" I said. She let go and stod back, "I promise I will help you remember,your my best friend and I'm gonna get you back" she smiled and I smiled back. "Thanks" I whispered. "No problem" she winked and I walked to lukes car and got in next to luke. She gave one final sigh and walked inside. I put my seat belt on and turned to luke, "you okay baby?" He asked and I nodded. "They seem so nice" I said quietly.

He nodded, "they are...they missed you loads" he said turning the key and pulling out of the drive. "Umm,yeah,I could tell" I whispered looking out of the window. "Woah,it's quite late, I didn't realise how long we were out." Luke chuckled as we drove down the dark road. "Hmm" I hummed in response. I couldn't help thinking that I ruined everything we had. I was the one who made Michael this way,I was the one who made Perrie cry and cry and I was the one who broke lukes heart. I felt tears running down my face and sniffed.

"Baby?" Luke asked. I quickly wiped my face and turned to the window even more shielding my face so he couldn't see me like this. I felt the car pull over and stop. "Baby what's wrong? Please tell me." Luke begged. "Nothing I'm fine" I smiled my most convincing smile I could. "Start the car" I nodded. "April baby, I know you better than you know yourself, your not fine baby" he laughed lightly. "Now, please tell me what's wrong?" He said holding my hands.

"I...I ruined everything,didn't I?" I said feeling more tears form in my eyes. "What?" Luke asked. "It was all me, I ruined everything, I was the one who forgot you all, I was the one who caused all this mess luke! If it wasn't for me it would still be all okay!" I said a sobbing mess. "Hey,hey, no, it wasn't your fault, shh,shh" luke coed bringing me in and hugging me tightly. "None of this was your fault, okay,don't cry" luke whispered. I nodded slowly and sighed.

He let go of me and wiped my tears away with his thumb. "Your the best thing that has ever happened to me and I love you more than anything" luke said to me looking deeply into my eyes. "Now,c'mon let's go home" he smiled and I nodded. He put his seat belt back on and the engine roared to life. After about twenty minutes we got home and I was really tired, "can we go to bed" I asked and luke nodded. "Course baby" he smiled and he held my hand whilst we walked upstairs slowly.

I got changed into my joggy bottoms and a baggy shirt and went into lukes room. It felt weird but I wanted to be near him and I didn't want to be alone. I waited in the doorway for a second before luke noticed me. "Hey baby, you okay?" He asked smiling and walking towards me. I nodded. "Could I...um...can I stay with you tonight? I don't really want to be alone." I said and he nodded. "Course, c'mon" he said and held out his hand. We walked to his bed and crawled under the warm covers. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer to him. He was warm and he would play with my hair every so often.

I sighed annoyed that I couldn't stop thinking about Niall and Kelly and everyone else back at home. Well, it was my home but not anymore. I'm happy here and the thought of being away from luke even for a second makes my body tremble. "Baby, you need to get some sleep" luke whispered and laughed softly. "I know but I can't" I sighed opening my eyes and seeing luke looking down at me with a concerned expression on his face. "What are you thinking about?" He asked and I was surprised he knew what was up but didn't question him. "Kelly...and rose...and Niall...and everyone!" I groaned burying my face in lukes chest.

I could tell he got annoyed by the mention of kellys name because he tensed up again. "Do you miss them?" He asked quietly and I shrugged. Honestly I don't know what I was feeling right now towards them. I missed Niall loads and he didn't do anything wrong so I'm not mad at him atall. It's the fact that Kelly and Dave and rose lied to me. Knowing i lived with them for so long and they lied to me about my life, my best friends were forgotten and luke was forgotten. How could they do that to me? That was the same question that kept popping up in my mind and it wouldn't go away. I wasn't mad at Ben though. He was too young to understand the situation and I probably miss him the most.

"It's okay if your confused at the moment...I kinda threw alot at you today but my Aprils strong" he said and kissed me on the head. I looked up at luke and smiled, I felt the most comfortable around him and even though I kinda should because...well, I suppose we're together but it still feels really weird for me. "Only coz you make me strong" I whispered and closed my tired eyes. He laughed,"someone's tired" he murmured to himself. "Night April" he whispered and kissed me on the head one final time. "Night luke" I whispered and soon I was in a deep sleep.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I've been really busy but here's chapter twelve, hope u like it and so sorry it's soooooooo late. I tryed to make it a little longer. Hope you've had a good day my beauty,I love you all, keep being amazing!

Hugs and kisses.
Molly