L's Journal

605 33 1
                                    

"Dear journal," Matt began.

"I had a rather disturbing dream last night. (Well, the word disturbing is an understatement.) My heart was fluttering out of my chest faster and faster, until it stopped beating completely. I felt a sharp pain in my upper-body region I heaved and leaned over, gripping the desk for support with white, trembling fingers. If I was anywhere near a heart monitor, it would have shown a single, flat line. No movement at all, not even the slightest heartbeat, just a dead, straight line. At exactly 1:00pm, I was pronounced dead. During the whole episode, I caught quick flashes of a white, boney hand scribbling my name in a Death Note. It was of course, Rem, the Shinigami. My fingers slipped off the desk one by one, and I collapsed in Light Yagami's arms, his eyes were tinted a bright, evil red.

"Well L, looks like I win." He spoke with victory in every word. I knew it. At the moment, the chances of Light being Kira rose to a full 100%. I slowly closed my slate, grey eyes. After that, it all became a frantic blur. The task force agents were rushing around me, searching for Rem. Light was confidently leading the team with his best acting skills. No one knows he's Kira. No one will ever know. Chaotic scenes whirled around me, as I stand over my dead body, invisible to others, hidden from sight.

I woke up in cold sweat. I un-buried my quavering head from my knees. I must have fallen asleep on my chair. My shoulders felt unsettling. Something's not right. I noticed that there was a plain quilt draped around my shoulders. It wasn't there before. My left handcuff clacked against my bare wrist, cold metal meeting skin. Light stirred, and slowly lifted his head off the pillows, his brunette hair still perfect, even though it was left uncombed for 8 whole hours. How can I manage to destroy something so perfect? I guess that's why I suspected him being Kira. Light's too flawless, way to flawless to be human. His movements, his mind, his voice, everything about him is unnaturally immaculate. This is the very first time I've been afraid. I'm way to scared to bring myself to solve the case. Light Yagami, Kira has no flaw, no weaknesses, nothing I can poke or prod to shatter him. It's no wonder why people are willing to worship him, to take him as their God.

"Ryuzaki, is everything alright?" He asked, breaking my train of thought.

"Yes, Light-kun. Except for one thing, who draped this quilt over me?"

"Oh, I did. I noticed that you fell asleep on the chair last night, and thought that you would be cold. It wouldn't do any good to have you get sick and die on us." Said Light who's clearly faking his kindness.

I nodded.

I didn't know what else to do or say. I could just tell the others that Light is Kira, but I don't have any proof. They wouldn't believe it. Besides, I can't just base my conclusions on just a dream. There's a 99.9% chance that Light's Kira.

This isn't the first time I had such a provoking dream. I dreamt about others' deaths as well. I had seen A's limp body, hanging from a noose from an oak tree just outside the iron gates of Wammy's house, I had envisioned B's body charred and burnt from the flames and other countless criminals and their brutal executions all in my dreams. I dream about people's deaths just a day before their actual death, which is why I barely sleep. It's better to find out about their death yourself, on their actual death day. I guess now, it's my turn. There's no escape to death. When I die, I'll finally, peacefully fall asleep for once I guess.

I munched on a Hershey's bar to comfort me. I felt like Mello for a moment. There's nothing else in this world that can reassure me other than sweets. Nothing else.

Light stares at me for some more, his eyes, cold and calculating, trying to read me, assembling all the pieces to his mental puzzle. Eventually, he resumes working. Light runs the game and so do I. This whole thing is like an intense game of chess, Light sits at one end of the table, I sit on the other. A mass of glossy black and white squares is laid out in front of us. The task force members and anyone else involved are the ivory pieces. We strategically move the pieces from there.

I grew tired of thinking, so I carefully unlocked my handcuff and slipped outside to stand on the roof and slip a view of rainy Tokyo. I needed a breather. I didn't know if it was my imagination, but from a distance, I heard the peaceful chime of bells. They rang so clearly in my head. These particular bells were usually rung at funerals to announce someone's death. I guess it was mine. The ringing of bells was abruptly cut off by echoing footsteps. I recognized the confident strides at once.

"Ryuzaki, everyone's wondering where you are." Light held up the left handcuff.

"I hear the bells." I blurted out, without much thought. (so much for keeping my thoughts inside.)

Light tilted his head in confusion.

"I'm sad today, you'll find out why soon." I added.

Light nodded. We stood in silence for a while.

"Come L, let's go back inside."

We both headed inside, soaking wet. I glanced over at Light, who was uncomfortably wet. I offered to dry him. For enemies, we were surprisingly kind to each other, although the kindness was all fake.

We returned to our desk. I looked over at the clock: 12:59-it read. I have one more minute to live. I guess this is the end, or the beginning of the end. Either way, it's the end of my era; the Gothic L era. At least my successors will take over from now on. Hopefully Mello and Near will agree to work together, but I have a feeling that will not be the case. My heart's fluttering uncontrollably. The bishop's (Ryuk) ambushing me from the side. Light slides the "queen" (which is Rem) right in front of me. Checkma-"

 Matt stopped reading. Everyone's heads are bowed down, and no one spoke for a long while. Even Linda stopped drawing.

"I wonder, did a Shinigami drop his/her brain?" Mello queried aloud, breaking the silence.

"Don't be dumb Mello. How could a Shinigami drop its brain, and do they even have brains?" Said Matt.

"I guess so."

Fractured Ties (A Death Note Matt x Reader)Where stories live. Discover now