Kaisoo One Shots

Paint me in (in a shade of you) [3/3]

  Evening descends upon the castle in a shower of stars and a gentle curtain of darkness, and Kyungsoo is about ready to go to bed. He hadn't really done much the whole day except wonder where Jongin was, and his heart ached thinking about all the time he'd wasted that day without the dancer by his side. Love makes minutes stretch out into hours, and Kyungsoo already feels like he's lived several lives without Jongin just from a day's absence.

Before he can settle into his chair for the night, however, he hears someone hiss from Jongdae's door. 'Psst,' goes the person. 'Hey - Kyungsoo!' and there isn't a doubt in Kyungsoo's mind - it's Jongin, handsome face decorated with a grin, excitement sparkling in his eyes. He waves Kyungsoo over with a flapping hand, and Kyungsoo's lips curl in amusement as he watches Jongin hop up and down a little with impatience.

'Where have you been this whole day?' Kyungsoo asks, trying not to let his mind wander too much when Jongin gives him a quick peck on the cheek. 'I haven't seen you around at all.'

'I was... Trying to cut a deal. Listen, it's a full moon tonight, and the sky looks absolutely amazing, you won't believe it. Do you want to come up to the astronomy tower and spend the night with me there?' Jongin asks, question and words all coming out in a rush. Kyungsoo laughs, nodding as he does and Jongin wastes no time in curling his fingers around the singer's, and then he's tugging him along through portraits and the dark tunnels of walls without portraits and Kyungsoo feels his lungs start to collapse when they finally reach a stepladder that leads to something that looks like a trapdoor.

'Wait here,' Jongin says, climbing up the stepladder without another word. He raps on the trapdoor with his knuckles, and hushed footsteps fall on the floor above their heads before it opens. Two girls, one with flaming red hair and the other with inky black, look down at them, and the red headed one instantly smiles.

'Look, Sunyoung! It's Jongin and his little boyfriend!' she says with glee, excitedly clutching Sunyoung's arm. 'Oh, he's adorable - no wonder you're head over heels!'

'Soojung!' Sunyoung scolds, glaring at her companion. She whispers something that sounds like you're embarrassing them, and Kyungsoo blushes. What, exactly, did Jongin tell these girls about him? About them? He wipes the thoughts from his mind, focuses on trying to fight his blush down.

The girls invite them into their portrait, and once inside, Kyungsoo can only stare in awe. Their portrait is of an empty field, green grass carpeting uneven ground, an endless expanse of sky above them. Jongin motions for him to take his hand, and Kyungsoo steps gingerly towards his boyfriend, taking comfort in the warmth he finds between those fingers.

'Don't look up. Look out,' he murmurs. Kyungsoo's gaze follows Jongin's, and he feels all the oxygen in his lungs escape when he sees what Jongin's so eager to show him.

'Wow,' he gapes, eyes greedily swallowing up the scene before him. Midnight sky stretches out for miles, further than his eyes can see, and a single, perfectly round moon hangs just beyond the reaches of the Whomping Willow. Its glow dusts a shimmer of illumination over the clouds framing it, the stars dancing in the distance. Kyungsoo has seen painted full moons before - Wufan's painted them plenty of times, and the scary portrait on the second floor next to the girl's toilet contains another depiction - but none of them measure up to this. 'It's beautiful,' tumbles out of his mouth without him consciously saying it.

'So beautiful,' Jongin murmurs.

His eyes are on Kyungsoo's profile, but the elder doesn't notice.

They spend a few more minutes sitting on the damp grass, just taking in the beauty no artist could capture. Kyungsoo sits, back straight, eyes forward, with Jongin's head on his shoulder, his fingers between his own. After a while Jongin starts to droop, and Kyungsoo almost doesn't catch his boyfriend's head when it loses purchase of his shoulder. 'Bed,' says Kyungsoo firmly, and Jongin leads him to a patch of grass that's a little drier than the one they'd just sat on. He lies down and stretches, patting his upper arm in a signal. Kyungsoo smiles, gets down and lays his head there.

They lie in silence for a while, eyes trailing over the stars glimmering above them. They aren't real, but they're still beautiful all the same. 'Have you ever thought what it would be like to be a star?' Jongin asks the question out of the blue, but Kyungsoo's grown accustomed to the abruptness.

'Not really, no. Why do you ask?'

'I think about what it would be like to be a star sometimes.' Jongin says. He licks his lips before he continues, a sign that he's telling Kyungsoo something nobody else knows about him, and that small reflex has Kyungsoo smiling. 'I know I've always said my goal is to be human, Kyungsoo. That's been my plan since I first realised gravity plays tricks on portraits the way they don't on humans. But - to be a star, Kyungsoo, an actual star. Do you know what that means?'

Ticklish friction rubs against Jongin's arm as Kyungsoo shakes his head, no.

'It means - it means you're completely free. You're free to be whoever you want to be, wherever you want, because there aren't any frames or even a planet to weigh you down. You get to watch every day as it happens around the world - you get to see people fall in love, fall sick, live and die whenever you want.' Jongin turns on his side, eyes burning into the side of Kyungsoo's face. Kyungsoo looks contemplative, and Jongin can tell, with relief, that he's been listening. He presses a gentle kiss to Kyungsoo's jaw, stealing a smile and all his breath and making his heart flutter in his ribcage.

'Don't you think you'd get lonely, though? Those stars seem pretty far apart to me,' Kyungsoo says. His fingers trace the line from one star to another, grimacing before he looks at Jongin.

'Not at all. I'm sure the stars get to move sometimes,,' Jongin reasons. He cards his fingers through Kyungsoo's hair, savouring the way silken locks feel between his roughened fingers. 'If you and I were both stars on opposite sides of the galaxy, I wouldn't hesitate to find a way to go to you.'

Jongin's words dust light pink across Kyungsoo's cheeks, and the elder burrows down, burying his face in the dancer's solid chest. Jongin says things so simply, so matter of fact that Kyungsoo often wonders what he'd done to deserve him. 'So that's why you want to be a star, huh?' he asks, face still hidden from Jongin's view.

'Well - there is onemore reason,' Jongin begins. Kyungsoo peeks up at him with widened eyes, a silent prompt to go on. 'People make wishes on falling stars. They put on masks of cynicism in the day, yeah, sure - but when they're tired and alone and can't see the calm after the storm - they put their hope in silly old stories like those of falling stars.'

He wraps his arms around Kyungsoo, appreciating the singer's warmth in his arms for a while before he goes on, eyes already drifting back to sleep.

'When stars die, they give hope. When humans die - they steal it.'

And with that, he falls asleep, leaving Kyungsoo alone with his thoughts.


Kyungsoo wakes up not two hours later to the sound of muffled speaking and people arriving by the large window through which he'd just viewed the full moon. There are maybe five or six hooded figures in black robes, silver masks covering their faces and the sight of them makes Kyungsoo shudder. One of the smaller ones step forward, back to Kyungsoo, and addresses the group. Kyungsoo pretends to be asleep.

'Listen up! We're to disguise ourselves as either students or temporary members of staff. Temporary arrangement, the plan will be executed a couple of days from now, but for right now - we have to stay hidden. The Headmaster has provided me with a list of jobs we could take, and I don't want any complaining or grumbling - do as you're told, go where you're told. Understood?' she says shrilly, and the rest of her party nods. She takes out a small piece of parchment and reads out the names and their disguises, and there aren't any complaints until she gets to the last one.

Kyungsoo decides that nobody is really paying attention to the small sleeping man in the portrait, and he tries to wake Jongin up. He needs to see this.

'Why do I have to be a Gryffindor student? Can't I just be in Slytherin? I don't know where any of the other bloody common rooms are in the first place,' the tallest one grumbles. The rest of the group seems to shrink away from him the moment the words leave his mouth, and the leader saunters up to him slowly, languidly, drawing her wand and pointing it at him.

Kyungsoo's eyes widen, and he tries to nudge Jongin awake. 'Jongin - Jongin, baby, you have to wake up -' he whispers, but Jongin doesn't stir.

'Did I just hear you complain about the role you were assigned?' she asks, voice low and dangerous and if the tall man weren't wearing a mask, Kyungsoo's sure he would be able to see drops of nervous perspiration trailing tracks down his skin. His own heart thunders in his chest, and he clings a little more to Jongin as he watches.

'Jongin! Seriously, please, wake up!'

'No, ma'am, I was just - for practicality and authenticity's sake, I just -'

'Try this for practicality and authenticity,' she mocks, before pointing her wand at him and shouting an incantation Kyungsoo's never heard of before, green light shooting out the tip of her wand and the man is thrown backward, body slamming into the wall behind him. His head lolls onto his shoulder, and the woman pockets her wand without further decorum. 'Come,' she barks, and the remaining members of her party jolt to attention, scurrying off behind her as quickly as they can.

Jongin finally stirs. 'Mmph, go back to sleep, Soo,' he murmurs. 'You probably had a bad dream. You can tell me about it in the morning,' he says, and then he falls silent again, sleep claiming him quicker than the pace of the heartbeats in Kyungsoo's chest. Kyungsoo is sure it wasn't just a dream - he's sure he'd just witnessed a murder. But he keeps his mouth shut, lays one hand on Jongin's chest and buries his face in his boyfriend's side, trying his best to calm down, to lull himself back to sleep.

When they wake up the next morning, the body isn't there anymore.


Power breeds tyranny. It's a saying Kyungsoo's heard several times over from Zitao, never really paying much attention to it in the past. But with the scene unfolding before his very eyes, he can't help calling to mind the hollowed look in Zitao's eyes the first time the younger said it, not now. Not now that Chanyeol is writhing on the floor, convulsing violently as he struggles for a relief that never comes.

'Stop it!' Baekhyun yells, voice a scratched surface struggling to smooth itself out. 'Please! Don't hurt him!' his voice is hoarse, crackled as if he's pulling it from the very last atoms of oxygen in his lungs. Tears stream down his face as the wand that's directed at Chanyeol sends wave after wave of pain shooting through his body, and if Baekhyun were human, if he could feel pain the way this Crucio curse was making Chanyeol feel it, he'd take it in a heartbeat. If only for Chanyeol, if only to stop the lines of pain contorted on his face from becoming permanent.

'Shut up,' growls the teacher, a professor Kyungsoo doesn't know the name of. Her eyes are lined with malicious purpose, dead to the cries she's making Chanyeol scream. She smiles as she twists her wand around, causing Chanyeol to curl in on himself, screech, cry, beg, but she doesn't stop. The crazed look in her eyes has Kyungsoo rethinking his decision to be human.

The ills of the outside world, the cruelty one wouldn't have thought possible of a being with a soul - aren't they protected from it? The castle walls may not be an ideal place to live until they die, but - nothing can hurt them, not the way this woman was hurting Chanyeol. Yes, they are fragile, they are under threat - but they could never be tortured, flayed, have the hope drained out of their bodies along with all their blood.

'You want to stand up for filthy Muggle-borns again, Mr Park?'

'No, please - please, I promise - '

And - and what was the source of all the world's troubles? Kyungsoo isn't blind. He isn't stupid. He sees the headlines the students try to hide from their professors - has spotted more bruises and wounds on them now since this professor and her brother joined the school. Humans are born with innate cruelty, put power in their hands - put a mere wand - and they could wreak havoc. Blood is shed in retaliation to bloodshed, murders committed to avenge other murders.

There is no win or lose when it comes to the violence humans involve themselves in. Everybody loses.

Kyungsoo looks away from where Chanyeol's clutching his stomach, clawing at it like he's trying to rip his insides out. It's clear what he's lost.

The professor - she's just lost her humanity.

'Please,' is just a broken whisper on Baekhyun's lips as another tear wets his skin.

'Professor Carrow!' Junmyeon's voice carries itself clear down the hall, Jinri at his heels. 'Stop! You aren't supposed to carry out punishments outside of your classroom!'

The wand relinquishes its toxic hold on Chanyeol's nerve endings, and Baekhyun sighs with relief. He doesn't even look pained when Jinri rushes to his side. Jongin barges into Jongdae's portrait, where the rest of his friends are, and doubles over, panting. 'Went - to get - Junmyeon. Prefect - and I knew she - isn't supposed to hurt him - outside her classroom,' he says. Kyungsoo rubs comforting circles on his boyfriend's back, the contact a silent thank you.

'And?' she snarls, coming dangerously close to Junmyeon. 'Are you going to stop me? This badge doesn't mean as much as you think it does, you know,' she spits, wand tapping Junmyeon's blue and bronze badge. 'Maybe I should punish you instead, for interrupting me.'

'And maybe I should remind you who my father is,' Jinri pipes up, Chanyeol's head in her lap. 'Because I know exactly who he is, and his very name means more than you think yours ever could.' she snaps, venom lacing all her words. She stares the professor down, gaze unfaltering. If anyone's losing this fight, it isn't her.

'You're the Choi girl,' the professor says, eyes skimming over Jinri's nametag. Jinri just tilts her chin defiantly. She walks up to Chanyeol, staring down her nose at him. 'You can't hide behind painted people forever, Mr Park. You're lucky he knew who to call for help. You'll soon see.' The professor gives them a final glare before she walks away, making sure to shove Junmyeon against the wall as she goes.

'Why does your father's name mean so much, Jinri?' Chanyeol asks, dazed but still curious. Jinri smiles fondly down at him, reluctance not letting her speak. She just shakes her head, and together with Junmyeon they take Chanyeol to the hospital wing. He needs mending.

When Baekhyun is suitably calm and Jongdae has promised to keep him company for the night, Jongin and Kyungsoo slip away to Jongin's bedroom. Kyungsoo needs space to think, to make the right decision although he already knows what his choice will be.

'Soo? Is there something bothering you, baby?' Jongin asks. He hugs Kyungsoo from behind, pressing a kiss to his hair and smiling when the elder interlaces their fingers. 'Do you want to talk about it?'

'It's just - Jongin, doesn't it bother you how cruel humans can be? I mean - you saw what that Carrow woman did to Chanyeol. If you didn't turn up when you did, she would have killed him.' Kyungsoo answers.

'That curse wouldn't have killed anyone. It's not meant to do that. And - and are you saying you don't want to become human anymore?' Jongin's voice shakes and his fingers tremble between Kyungsoo's, and when the singer turns in his embrace to look at Jongin, he can see how difficult it is for the dancer to hide his anxiety. Kyungsoo licks his lips.

'When Chanyeol was being tortured, all I could hear was Baek's yelling. His screaming, his begging, his pleading. He wanted so much to go to Chanyeol, to stop the pain, to help him in any way - but he couldn't. Because essentially he isn't real - he isn't human. And that broke my heart.' Kyungsoo inhales a shaky breath, plants both palms on Jongin's chest. 'And - and I realised that that's not the way things are meant to be.

'When you love someone the way Baekhyun loves Chanyeol - nobody should be allowed to stand between that. When you have a love as true as the one Baekhyun has in his heart - he should be allowed to explore it.' Kyungsoo finishes.

'So you're still in?'

Kyungsoo nods. 'As much as I don't want to fuel the already booming industry for cruelty on this planet, I don't want to take away from the possibility that I could do something to dampen it. I could help so many people if I were human - people like Baekhyun, people who love the way Baekhyun loves Chanyeol.'

Jongin's lips quirk up in a smirk. 'You mean people who love the way you love me?' he teases. Kyungsoo swats at his chest, frowning slightly with a don't be so cocky, Jongin. Jongin just smiles and leans in for a kiss, the force of it sending Kyungsoo's head back. And yet Jongin is the first to pull away, lips stained with Kyungsoo's spit.

'Are you going to pretend you don't love my cockiness?' he challenges.

Kyungsoo peppers kisses down Jongin's jaw, to his chest, lower and lower and lower.

No.


They feel the initial impact rattle the castle to its centuries-old foundation. Nobody has been anywhere near the fourth floor corridor for the past hour, most of the students trickling away into the Great Hall the moment that voice filled the air. Jongin didn't like it. He heard nothing but despair and autocracy in it, nothing human. It sounded soulless, the voice, and it didn't echo off the walls the way you would expect, but instead it seeped into the cement, the despair it carried lingering on the brickwork even when the voice has long gone.

Another explosion is heard somewhere in the distance, and Baekhyun and Kyungsoo tremble in Jongdae and Jongin's arms. The castle was meant to be a safe haven, nobody was meant to be allowed to destroy that - but right now, right as the thoughts form in Jongin's mind, they were doing just that. Somebody was trying to destroy Hogwarts.

Somebody was trying to destroy their home.

The first flair of fire shoots straight and narrow down the corridor, and all four of the men jump. A hooded figure holding the wand that's emitting the fire glides down after it, cackling maniacally as he yells for 'All our little blood traitors and filthy Muggle lovers to come out and play!' The men in the portrait stay completely still, unwilling to get burned by fire spawning from dark magic. Death is imminent once the flames touch their portraits.

A loud crash is heard somewhere just beyond the corridor, and the Death Eater immediately extinguishes his flame, gleefully running off to the source. Jongin, Jongdae, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo can hear shrieking, spells being hurled towards victims, screams of pain and agony. They can't see anything save for what's right in front of their eyes, blind to the chaos that's happening a couple of floors below them, too afraid for their lives to try and see.

But if they could, if they could peek outside the window of the corridor and thrust their heads out into night air, the first thing they would smell would be the smell of bloodlust. Bodies descend upon bodies, wave after wave of incantations thrown back and forth between two warring sides. Fires break out everywhere, infernos dotted all over, eating into the school grounds. A child breaks out of the line of defense made up of stone knights, wand trembling in his hand - and falls, a simple flick of a Death Eater's wrist plucking the life from his very veins.

War is an ugly thing, and often people forget about the devastation, the lives lost as it runs its course. All that is remembered is the glory in its wake - shiny pieces of metal awarded as a congratulations for surviving, for killing other people in the hope that you will not be killed.

The entire idea has Kyungsoo retching, clutching on to Jongin's arm for sanity, burying his face in Jongin's chest. More screams and more yells echo up to them, and Kyungsoo just wishes everything would stop.

It's just as he thinks this that two pairs of feet come rushing towards them - Junmyeon and Chanyeol had come by to make sure their friends are alright. 'You guys fine?' Chanyeol asks urgently, leaning down to inspect his friends. 'Everyone still intact?'

'What's going on, Chanyeol?' yells Baekhyun, trembling all over. Chanyeol fixes them all with the most serious look they'd ever seen him wear, and it makes terror snake its way down into their bones.

'The fight of our lives.'

'Jinri! Jinri, quickly - I'm to take you to the Great Hall!' Junmyeon yells, spotting the girl just as she dashes by the corridor. His hand curls around her upper arm, but before he can get a steady grip on it, his body is sent flying, thrown across the corridor before it hits the wall opposite. Chanyeol looks in horror at Junmyeon and immediately rushes to his friend's side, pulling him up to rest his back against the wall.

'Junmyeon? Are you alright?' he asks, frantically checking Junmyeon over for any other injuries. He's thankful when he finds none - the only thing that seems to have been hurt is his pride and his back muscles. Chanyeol throws an angry glare in Jinri's direction. 'What was that for? He was only trying to help!' he growls, and Jinri raises her wand as a reflex. Chanyeol raises his eyebrows at her.

'Stay back! Stay back or - or I'll have to hurt you!' she yells, voice clear even as tears cloud her eyes.

'Jinri?' Chanyeol says, so softly Jongin can see how Jinri's determination falters. But then it's back again, and her wand is pointed directly and Chanyeol's chest, and all of the men in Kyungsoo's portrait tense. She doesn't look like she's messing around. Chanyeol raises both his hands. 'Look - my wand is in my pocket. I'm not armed. You don't have to do this.'

'You don't understand! You've never understood, just like how you never saw that Baekhyun's in love with you!' Jinri shrieks, and at the mention of his name, Baekhyun pales. How did she know hangs on to dear life on the tip of his tongue, but now is not the time to wonder. 'Back away, Chanyeol, let me pass - or I will hurt you.' she says, more firmly now, sounding more sure of herself and what she has to do than she's ever been.

'Why would you ever hurt me? Jinri, I - '

Jinri lets out a frustrated screech, slashes her wand wildly in the air and the next thing Jongin knows, Chanyeol is bleeding profusely, blood flowing freely from his arm and he screams. He falls to the ground just beneath Sehun's portrait, and the whole world can hear Baekhyun's heart break. Jinri pauses just long enough to stare at the damage she's done and feel remorse prick her where it hurts most, before she shoves it away. There's ice in her voice when she speaks next. 'I already told you my father's name means more than Carrow's does. You should have listened.' she says, and she's gone.

Junmyeon winces as he hurries over to Chanyeol, tugs his tie all the way off and wraps it around the gash. 'Do something!' Baekhyun wails, clawing at the barrier as he watches Chanyeol bleed. 'There's so much blood, I - Junmyeon, please!' he yells, vein in his neck strained.

'I can't - remember - the spell I need to say to get it to stop, oh - hang on Yeol, I'm sorry -' Junmyeon says, guilt riddling his words. He ties the tie as tightly as he can to try and stop the bleeding, but it doesn't work. 'Kyungsoo, Jongdae! I need you to go find a professor, or at least one of the older students. They'll know how to stop this,' he says, shaking fingers ripping his sleeve off his shirt and binding it around Chanyeol's wound. 'Go quickly. And - and take Baekhyun with you.'

'No, I don't want to - Kyungsoo and Jongdae, and Chanyeol - '

'Baekhyun, GO!'

The three run off to get help, and Jongin stays behind with Junmyeon. 'Junmyeon - there must be something you can do. A potion,something - '

'There is!' Junmyeon interrupts, memory coming back to him. 'There's a general aid cabinet in the prefects' room - Dittany, a couple of drops of it and he'll be fine!' he says. 'But - but I can't just leave him here, what if - '

'I'll watch him for you. Nobody's likely to come down this way anyway, and - and Junmyeon, while you're at it, you might as well get the potion for me and Kyungsoo, too.' Jongin says. His words are slow and tentative, a sharp contrast to his heartbeats.

'But - but it's not ready, Jongin, it needs to brew for at least another day - and how am I going to keep you safe with this chaos? You'll be crushed underfoot!' Junmyeon says, voice rising in a panic.

'You don't know that. For all you know the process could be faster than what we thought, and I'd be big enough to watch over Chanyeol and help you fight this war. Junmyeon.' Jongin fixes the student with his most intense stare, sincerity burning through his irises. 'This battle is worth more than just my life.' he says. 'Go. Find the potion to make Chanyeol better, so at least he can defend himself, and then when he's okay, go find the potion to make me human. You can do this. Go.'

So Junmyeon does.


'I just checked the third floor, something's caved in. Everyone's out in the courtyards or in the towers!' Jongdae yells, feet pounding against the floor of various each resident more terrified than the last. He doesn't have the time to comfort them, though - he needs to find help.

They need to find help, fast.

'We could try the fifth floor - someone's bound to be up there,' Baekhyun suggests. His panic has melted away into sheer determination, and Jongdae and Kyungsoo nod. They find their way upstairs easily enough, but just before they can scope out whether or not the coast is clear, something explodes just in front of them and Baekhyun falls backward, shock from the impact rendering him speechless.

'It's moving!' Jongdae yells, and sure enough - the fire is moving, is alive, is licking at the walls and coming straight at them. 'RUN!' Jongdae shouts, and he just about manages to hook Baekhyun's arms around his neck and hoist the elder onto his back before he breaks out into a run, huffing and puffing under Baekhyun's weight. Kyungsoo speeds off ahead of them, legs on autopilot, just praying that Jongdae and Baekhyun will forgive him this act of cowardice, that they will still look at him the same way when all this is over.

Kyungsoo feels his heartbeats quicken, a frantic pace that sends adrenaline throughout his entire body. His legs are already taking him as fast as they can go, unskilled limbs running a race they were never made for. He can hear shouts, echoes of voices he finds vaguely familiar - he realises, with a jolt that almost has him heaving up all his insides, that they're all his friends'. Baekhyun's loud groan transitioning into Jongdae's shouts, threatening to destroy his vocal cords. The chaos that he'd just left behind is nothing short of devastating, and it pains him just to bear witness to it.

But he can't stop now, can't turn around and help them, because his body is a missile with a fixed target - he's sure he shouldn't be surprised when he finds himself running toward Jongin. The sounds of his friends' anguished cries die down once he reaches Sehun's portrait, exhaustion clinging to his limbs, making him collapse into Jongin's arms. The taller man holds him close, tight, like he's something precious, and in the midst of destruction, Kyungsoo finds his own little haven. Jongin pulls away, engages Kyungsoo's eyes with his own. The elder almost doesn't notice that Chanyeol isn't bleeding anymore, only looks a little paler than his usual shade.

'Junmyeon managed to stop the bleeding. Kyungsoo - you know what we have to do,' Jongin says. Kyungsoo nods. He does - he knows they have to rid themselves of the shackles that come locked to their limbs along with the title of being a portrait - they need to remove all this vulnerability that comes with being unable to perform any sort of real magic, being held hostage by a frame and a canvas. Their entire existence is fragile, at the moment, and Kyungsoo hates this feeling. It puts him on edge. He tiptoes, presses his lips and a silent I love you so much to Jongin's lips, and lets them linger for longer than necessary.

Another explosion tinges the black behind his eyelids with orange, and Jongin pulls him away urgently. They need to get this going. 'Junmyeon!' Jongin yells, desperation carrying his voice down the long corridor. Junmyeon isn't far - in fact, he'd just turned the corner when Jongin called his name. He walks hurriedly, with the air of someone holding something precious and needing to deliver it quickly, and Kyungsoo spots the vial in his hand. 'Junmyeon,' Jongin whimpers, tone dripping with gratitude and emotion. He's waited so long for this day.

'Listen, I only have enough of this to try this once, so I'm sorry if it doesn't work. Hold still,' Junmyeon instructs. He conjures up a paintbrush, one that's long and slim enough to fit into the mouth of the vial, and coats its bristles with the potion. The sound of fighting approaches quicker, and Junmyeon finds himself trembling. He holds the paintbrush up to Jongin, stowing the vial back into his pocket before waving his wand and saying an incantation.

The brush never touches Jongin.

'Junmyeon, watch out!' Chanyeol cries. Junmyeon catches sight of the dark, hooded figure with its wand extended and he gives a startled cry - drops himself to the ground just as the Death Eater fires.

The spell connects with a point just beyond Junmyeon's head, a stream of orange light crackling and sparking and setting fire to whatever it touches.

It doesn't harm Junmyeon.

In Sehun's portrait, Jongin sinks to the ground.

Chanyeol blasts the wizard into unconsciousness, and struggles to help his friend up. 'Are you alright?' he asks, checking Junmyeon all over for injuries and only finding a couple of cuts from where he'd grazed against the brick wall as he fell. Chanyeol begins to wipe up the blood with his sleeve, when his eyes catch sight of the damage the Death Eater had managed to do. 'Jongin!' he yells urgently, abandoning his preoccupations to look into Sehun's portrait.

Jongin's portrait is burning, a fire alive licking at the inside of his empty dancing room, a malicious spectacle nobody wanted to see come alive, and Kyungsoo -

Kyungsoo is watching the love of his life fade.

'Jongin - Jongin, please, you can't leave me,' he begs, voice breaking as he holds the dancer's head in his lap. Tears are flowing freely from widened eyes, broken whimpers escaping swollen lips. He bends down, peppers kisses all up and down Jongin's cheek, nothing but desperation driving him. 'Please please please,' he murmurs, but no matter how much he begs, he can't deny how the opacity of Jongin's being slowly deteriorates.

Junmyeon and Chanyeol can only watch in horror as their friend fades away, his body, his soul, disappearing into nothingness.

'Do something!' Kyungsoo screeches, eyes on Junmyeon's. 'Don't just stand there staring at him! Give him the potion! Put out the fire, someone - anyone, please...'

Jongin's hand comes up to swipe at the skin underneath Kyungsoo's eyes. The singer leans into his touch, tries to memorise this warmth, this feeling, because he knows he won't be able to feel it for much longer. It burns him inside out to watch Jongin die, but he knows he can't look away. If not for him, then for Jongin. His will be the last pair of eyes his lover sees.

'Kyungsoo - stop,' Jongin says weakly. He curls their fingers together, pressing a kiss to Kyungsoo's as he goes. 'The potion won't help me now. It's done,' Jongin says. It's a struggle, Kyungsoo can tell, for Jongin to find the right words, for him to speak them, because by now he's faded so much that Kyungsoo can almost see the fabric of his pants even as Jongin's head is on his lap. 'I'm sorry,'

'Shh, don't speak. There's nothing for you to be sorry for,' Kyungsoo says. His voice shakes, his eyes water, but he never lets go of Jongin's hand. He will hold on until there is nothing left for him to hold on to. 'You just have to hold on a little longer, we'll find a way to get you out of this mess - '

Jongin cuts him off with a kiss to his fingers, one that propels Kyungsoo to lean down and claim those lips with his own. It's a bruising kiss, one that speaks volumes about how much Kyungsoo will miss him, how much Jongin doesn't want to leave, how closely intertwined their very souls are - how much love there is between them.

It's always difficult having to let go of someone you love. Whether it be after months' notice from a doctor, or after a chance encounter with fate - losing someone you care about is never easy. Kyungsoo thinks he wouldn't be prepared for the kind of sting there is in his heart even if he'd been warned weeks beforehand that he would lose Jongin, that the love of his life would leave him this way.

Nothing worth having ever comes easily, he knows now. The memories he'd made with Jongin, the love they'd shared - he wouldn't forget those until his dying day. Fate may take Jongin from his arms, but it will never take him from his heart and mind.

'I'm going to miss you, so much,' Kyungsoo whispers. Jongin is nothing but faint streaks of colour now, his warmth almost gone, and Kyungsoo tries to contain the panic that's rising up from his stomach into his chest. 'I wish... I wish we had more time.'

A feeble 'me, too,' is all Jongin can manage, but it's enough for Kyungsoo. They share another kiss, one that's tender and gentle and feels like two souls tying themselves together more than anything else, and they manage to murmur a final 'I love you,' to each other before Jongin... Is gone.

Kyungsoo sits on the floor of Sehun's portrait, alone, fingers clutching at thin air. His lower lip trembles, and silence fills the portrait for half a heartbeat before he chokes and howls with grief, hands clutching the fabric of his chest as if fighting to keep his heart from breaking. He hears footsteps rushing towards him, light enough to be Jongdae's, and soon he's crying into the fabric of the other man's singed suit. He can barely make out what he's saying, only able to tell that it involves Jongin's name, thought process hindered by the massive wave of grief that washes over him.

'Shh, it's going to be okay,' he hears Jongdae say, and he wants to punch the elder, rage building up underneath all the despair. He wants to scream at him - no, it's not going to be okay! Can't you see? I lost Jongin, I lost the love of my life, I lost - I've losteverything - but he doesn't. He's too tired to do anything but let himself melt into Jongdae's arms, doesn't so much as protest when his wailing dies down and both Jongdae and Baekhyun lift him into Sehun's bed.

Baekhyun stays with him until he falls asleep, long fingers carding into his hair, swiping it away from his forehead. Kyungsoo thinks he probably looks like a mess, knows that he's sweating profusely, but Baekhyun doesn't say a word. He just keeps humming a lullaby to him, his voice soft and delicate, until Kyungsoo decides to just give in to sleep. Tiredness tugs at his eyelids and exhaustion wraps around his bones, and soon enough, he falls asleep.

There isn't anything good waiting for him if he stays awake, anyway.

(The battle is won.)


Weeks pass, and soon enough, Hogwarts heals itself. The burn marks on the buildings take a while to remove, but with the combined efforts of the students and the teachers, the castle is back to something that resembles what it looked like before. Rebuilding is a team effort, and the castle's inhabitants are all more than willing to chip in.

Kyungsoo returns to his portrait three days after Jongin's death. Jongdae and Baekhyun make sure to never leave him alone unless he explicitly asks them to, aware that grief is a chasm that some may never escape. Kyungsoo watches as Junmyeon and Chanyeol, with heavy hearts, remove the frame of Jongin's portrait. The remnants of the frame and the canvas are swept away, and all that's left of Jongin after the wall has been cleaned is the plaque that has his name engraved on it.

Sometimes, Kyungsoo wonders if this is worth it. A world without Jongin is a world immersed simultaneously in too much darkness and too much light - the darkness still lingers because Kyungsoo misses Jongin something fierce, and there is an unnecessary abundance of light because every day brings with it the reminder that the world keeps on spinning even though Jongin's heart has stopped beating and Kyungsoo feels himself stripped of his own soul.

'I just don't feel like going on,' Kyungsoo murmurs one day, buried under the blankets of Jongdae's bed, hidden amongst the rows of disused audience chairs, because really - who was he kidding, he couldn't stay in his own portrait. They'd made too many memories there, and Kyungsoo isn't strong enough to wake up every morning to face that mark again.

Jongdae pats him soothingly on the back, sitting by his side as the room fills with heavy silence. 'He would have wanted you to, you know. Go on, I mean,' he says gently.

'And what would he have expected me to do about that stupid burn mark on that wall?' Kyungsoo shouts, exasperation making him throw back the covers and leap out of bed. 'It's the first thing I see every morning when I wake up, I hear his voice crying my name everyday, I see him fade again every single day - '

'Hey.' Jongdae says, a firm syllable to silence Kyungsoo's flurry of words. He walks up to Kyungsoo, drags him back towards the bed and sits him down. 'If it gets too much for you - you can always go away for a while. The castle's big, and you don't have to stay if you feel like you can't.'

Jongdae purses his lips together as Kyungsoo hangs his head. He pretends he doesn't see the tears that drop into the younger's lap.

'If you need to get away, Kyungsoo, I'm not going to stop you. I know this is hard, and I'm going to do everything I can to try to make this easier on you, alright?'

Kyungsoo nods feebly, and lays his head on Jongdae's shoulder. They stay like that for a little while longer, a singer struggling to find comfort between the bars of another singer's being. When the tears stop, Kyungsoo lays back down, and Jongdae sets up camp onstage. Just before they fall asleep, Jongdae says one last thing -

'But you can't run away forever.'

Kyungsoo doesn't reply.

He knows Jongdae is right.

'Jongdae. Jongdae, this isn't like you - wake up.'

'Hm? What is it, Baek?'

'It - it's Kyungsoo. Jongdae, he's gone, we have to look for him, who knows what kind of trouble he - '

'Don't panic, Baek. Just. Relax.'

'How can I? Kyungsoo is missing, Jongdae!'

'Relax. He'll be back.'


Kyungsoo finds himself back in Soojung and Sunyoung's portrait in the astronomy tower at the crack of dawn. He'd slipped out of Jongdae's bed, his portrait, ran and ran and ran - until he stopped right in front of the trapdoor with the stepladder, not even bothering to knock when he went in. Soojung and Sunyoung didn't mind, though. Both girls had hugged him wordlessly, settled him in a quiet corner where he could watch the clouds roll and the sky colour, and left him alone.

Their words can wait for later.

He spends his entire day there, not trying to make shapes out of the clouds, not trying to think about the intricacies of philosophy. He spends the entire day trying to draw a blank, but it doesn't work. How can it, he thinks, when all he can think about is Jongin? Jongin was a force of nature unto himself, filling all the empty crevices of Kyungsoo's thoughts he could find. Jongin's essence had seeped into Kyungsoo's skin, filled the spaces between his veins, and no matter how hard he tries, there is no escaping the dancer.

The dancer's memory, he reminds himself strictly.

As baby blue bleeds into light purples on pinks and burnt orange begins to dye the sky, Kyungsoo lets himself observe the natural phenomenon of night and day. The entire concept makes him think.

It all begins in the mornings. Mornings dawn fresh and new with the prospect of a better life, and when he thinks that way, Kyungsoo supposes Jongin was his mornings. The image of sunkissed skin so close to his as they watch the sunrise has Kyungsoo's eyes prickling, but he refuses to let tears fall. And then he thinks how Jongin is also in all his nights, that night they'd shared together, right here, watching the full moon completely and wholly etched into his memory.

He tries to distract himself, tries to change the course of his thoughts. Day - day is hope, day is perseverance, day is cheerful dispositions. Night is dubious intentions, night is sinister, night doesn't have anything but artificial light and hope offering nothing in the way of solace.

Morning is before Jongin, day is Jongin, and night is after Jongin.

Kyungsoo suffocates in a neverending night.


He comes back two nights later, to a Baekhyun that's struggling to hold his tongue and a warm smile from Jongdae.

This will have to do from now on.


'You okay?' Jongdae asks, putting a hand on Kyungsoo's shoulder. It's the question Kyungsoo knows everyone's been asking, and he takes a minute to think about it. The obvious answer, of course, would be no - he'd just lost the love of his life, after all. But when he takes a minute to look around, to appreciate his surroundings - he realises that that answer might not be true after all. Jongdae and Baekhyun were still intact, Baekhyun's portrait slightly ripped, but on the mend. Sehun, Wufan, Zitao - even Yixing and Soojung and Sunyoung had survived the battle and were all safe. Junmyeon and Chanyeol had minor injuries - Junmyeon's cuts had mostly scabbed over, and Chanyeol's arm was in a sling - but they were alive. Things hadn't turned out ideally the way Kyungsoo wanted them to - but for the most part, he had to admit, he was thankful.

So when he turns to look at Jongdae, whose eyes are lined with concern for his friend, he manages a small smile, the first he'd had in days. 'Yeah,' he murmurs, and Jongdae returns the smile before pulling his friend in for a hug. It isn't the same as Jongin's - Jongdae is shorter, his hold less firm, as if afraid he'd hurt Kyungsoo - but it brings him comfort nonetheless. And Kyungsoo is grateful, so grateful that he has friends to help him through this ordeal.

You can view the death of a loved one as an immovable boulder in your path to happiness, or you can treat it as an obstacle that will only make the journey more worthwhile. It will always be there, its weight settled in your chest, but even the heaviest of burdens become lighter once you learn to accept it, once you've lived with it long enough. The pain will never truly disappear, time doesn't mend all wounds - but it helps smooth a balm over it, and as heartbroken as you are now, the pain will ease. It won't disappear completely, but it will ease.

That night, when Baekhyun is asleep on his makeshift bed on Kyungsoo's floor and the rest of the castle has descended into silent darkness, Kyungsoo pulls out a fresh music sheet, a quill and some ink. He stares at Jongin's plaque for a long, long moment before an idea for a song comes to him. When Jongdae wakes up he'll ask him to properly compose the music, but for now, Kyungsoo has melodies and notes coming to him like an avalanche.

He dips the quill into ink, dabs off the excess and presses it to the music sheet. It doesn't take him long to think up a title, and it's the first thing he writes.

Soliloquy: from a singer to a fallen star.