Beside You: A Michael Clifford Fanfic

Chapter 9- Hold On To Me Tonight

   He did it again. That smile. Michael's smile is what love felt like. Everything about him helped me know what love felt like. What Michael and I had just done was love at its finest. I couldn't help but think I was luckiest girl in the world to know the feeling of being in love. Especially with someone like Michael. I still couldn't believe it. My train of thought was interrupted by movement next to me in the bed. Michael. 

   "Promise that you won't let me go, that you'll hold on to me tonight. at least until I have to go." He had a longing in his eyes. He meant it. I couldn't say no. I sure as hell wasn't planning on sayin no, either.

   "I promise." I leaned over and kissed him. Michael smiled and sat up. He grabbed his boxers and tee shirt off the ground. He slipped his boxers on and sat back down. 

   "Wear this please." He handed me his tee shirt. I pulled it over my head and smiled at him. He laid back down next to me, and put his hand on mine. I had to pull away to grab my underwear off the floor. I quickly put them back on and got back under the covers with Michael. He put his arms around me and placed a kiss on my forehead. I put my lips against his ear,

   "I really do love you, Mikey." I wanted to tell him as much as I possibly could. I wanted him to hear it as often as possible. Someone like Michael deserved to be loved. He kissed me in response, and I could feel him smile into my lips. I love that I make him happy. I smiled back. He felt it. He pulled back and we laughed for a while. I let my head fall onto his chest, and he pulled me closer to his body. His arms around me. It felt perfect. It felt..right. The way I fit in his arms, body to body, was perfection. I listened to his heart beat, I felt his chest fall up and down; breathing. It slowed. He fell asleep. I slowly pulled my arm out from under his to grab my phone. I set an alarm for 5:30 a.m., because he couldn't stay the whole night. He sure as hell couldn't be seen here by my mother. I thought 5:30 would leave us enough time to be solitary, yet again, before anyone in the house woke up. I set my phone back down, and put myself against his body again. He was warm. He made me feel safe. I felt his chest fall up and down again, and I slowly drifted asleep.

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   I heard the alarm. It was quiet, but still audible. Michael hadn't heard it. I looked outside. It was still dark. Maybe even darker than it was before I fell asleep. I sat up. I nudged Michael's arm. He moved.

   "You gotta get up, Mikey." I didn't want him to.

   "Do I have to go, babe?" Yes. I didn't want him to go. But he had to. My mother could not find him here in the morning. She'd be furious. I wanted to say no. I wanted to stay next to him, to talk until the sun came up. I wanted to lay in bed with him all day. I never wanted him to leave. I could stay here, in his arms, just like this. Forever.

   "Yes." I replied, reluctantly. Because he did have to leave. He sat up, rubbing his eyes. I sat behind him, and wrapped my legs around his waist. I rested my hands on his chest, and kissed his neck. He put his hand on my knee and squeezed. He turned and kissed me, then got up. He picked his clothes up off my floor and began to put everything back on. I started to take his shirt off, to give it back to him. 

   "Keep it. I want you to have it." He said pulling the shirt back down around my torso. He picked my hoodie up off the floor and put it on. 

   "I'll bring it back when I come to see you later." He kissed me one last time and proceeded to leave through my window. I got up and watched him leave. Watched him walk back into the darkness of this cold, November morning. I couldn't see him, but I waited until I heard his car start. I heard the engine turn. I locked the window and returned to bed. It didn't feel the same.

I wish he was still here.