Fix a Heart

chapter one

CHAPTER ONE

In her entire 18 year old life she would never ever tought things would end up like that. End, that was the best word to describe what was going on right now. It was the end for her, she didn’t see any hope for better life or for getting her old life back.

It’s been three months since she found out about her parents being in car accident. They took them to the hopistal but it was to late, they both died.

Did she know about this? Did she have chance to say goodbye to them? No. That was probably what hurted her the most. At last seconds of their lifes there was no one around them, she wasn’t there and it was the thing she would never forgive herself.

For making everything worse, she blamed herself for what happend. No one even know about this, she barerly spoked to anyone even her best friend Jess. No one was aware of a big whole of guilt that was right there in her heart. If she only wouldn’t ask them to get her pizza on the way back home, if she only for once to surive without her guilty pelasure meal maybe her parents would be with her right now and she wouldn’t have to deal with all this.

For past three months she barerly left her room, well it wasn’t her room, it was a guest room at her uncel’s house, where she temporary was leaving. Yes she was 18 and she could live on her own but her family or at least what was left of it would never agree on that. As much as she might hated that right now they cared way to much for her to just let her be on her own.

But the real reason was that they were scared, scared that she might do something to herself. She wasn’t her usual cheerful self, always so positive with the biggest and most beautiful smile on her face that this earth could see. She was that person who bright up the room the second she walked in but this all was gone, her soul was gone with a second she found out about her parents.

She didn’t smile, only if she had too but it was the saddest smile you could imagine. She forced herself to go out and pretend that she was handlin things like that. She was acting and people besides her family believed her. Everyone tought she was so strong and brave but this was just all act because in side she was falling it pieces, saying she was in pain wouldn’t be enough she felt like she was dead.

This all happenening to a girl who just turned 18 and was about to start her new life with best firend in their new rented flat was way too much to handle. Many times she wished to be in that car with her parnets than she would be with them much happier.

Did she believe in God? Before that she surely did but now her faith was weak and unsure just like her emotions. It all came to the point where her family couldn’t take that anymore.

Uncle Jerry living with his wife Rebecca and two adorbale daughters Emma and Rose couldn’t just look at his niece slowing dying inside. He tried many times to talk to her, he send his wife thinking maybe girl to girl talk would help more but nothing was working. It was bad enough already and his daughters being so young and not understanding things, he just didn’t want them to see that, could you blame him? He loved Zendaya and he was in grave too after all Clair was his sister but he had family and life to carry on, maybe it was just easier for him as he had people for who it was worth living and Zendaya? Who she had? Because right now she felt like no one.

"Knock knock" Rebecca said instead of knocking for real. The bedrooms door was open so she let herself in. 

Zendaya was in her usual position on bed with headphones in her ears listening to music or sleeping, who know as her back was always to the door. That was the way for her to cut off from the world.

"Zendaya?" Rebecca said but got no respons from a young woman. She got a little worried but as she walked up to her and shaked her arm lightly she realized she was sleeping and she just woke her up.