Chemo Therapy during 3rd Period

February 27

This week has somehow not sucked as much as I though it was going to on Monday. So Tuesday, I went to school with an opened mind after all, I was literally sitting at rock bottom. I told Taylor and Kate we were having a friend meeting at my house after school.

After school, I drove to my house constantly glancing back to see if Kate and Taylor were still behind me. When we arrived at my house, we all went in and they sat on the couch and I decided to stand. I looked them in the eye and basically what I said was quit acting like I am dead. I AM STILL HERE. I HAVE CANCER AND I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE ON BOARD BUT APPARENTLY NOT BECAUSE YOU TWO WON'T EVEN TALK TO ME. ALL YOU DO IS LOOK AT ME. Kate said something along the lines of I am sorry. I guess I just couldn't seem to actually comprehend the fact you had cancer. We did some more talking and finally we were back to doing what we normally do. We sat in my living room and just laughed and chatted. It was like for that moment in time cancer didn't seem to exist. All of the sudden there was a knock at my door. Taylor got up to answer it. My aunt Kathy showed up. Well actually she is not my aunt she is my godmother. She walked in and said "Your mother called me and we talked. I am here to be your stand in parent." I walked over and hugged her and just started crying. Finally, someone was here to be my parent.

Wednesday- Kathy and I went to my doctor appointment for a cat scan and blood test. They she took me out for coffee. We talked about my oh so lovely parents. She told me what really happened because she wanted to always be honest with me. My mom found out that my dad had been seeing another women. But when he saw me lying in the hospital bed and my mother just sitting there with tears rolling down her face. He claims a flashback of emotion and memories came back and he knew he regretted everything. After "pouring" out his heart, my parents decided they needed to repair their marriage and found a marriage counseling camp. My parents don't know how long they will be there. When the therapist feels like their relationship is in a way better place than it is now.

Thursday- So life is not completely at rock bottom. Things are falling into some sort of an order. I get my test results on Tuesday. Next hurdle to figure out: Carson. Trying to get him to talk to me is like trying to find a vein in my arm sometimes. LOL! Anyway, during history we have to do a group thing. Taylor, this other girl named Klaire and Carson and I all go out in the hall to work on it. He keeps looking at me and I decide then to say what's on my mind "Why wont you talk to me?" He keeps working. Klaire and Taylor have stopped working and look at him and me. He just looked at us and said "Because..." Our teacher came in the hall and told us to come in. We all got up and followed him In the classroom. During class, I kept glancing at him. He said something. I was not paying close enough attention to understand what he was saying. After class I looked for him but he was gone. Apparently after class the boys basketball team left to head up north to play in a playoff game.

Friday- NO ONE WAS AT SCHOOL. Everyone had gone up to the game. But I needed to go to school to continue doing all my missing work. But I see on social media that everyone is having so much fun. When I say everyone, I mean my friends and Carson. I wanted to go but couldn't. I can't really travel yet.

Today- This week has been filled with crazy moments and unusual ones. But I know one thing for sure I have a crush on Carson and my life is anything but ordinary. I really hope he likes me too.