I hope, I Think, I know (An Oasis bandfiction)

Chapter Seventeen

I stepped outside. The cool night air would make me think clearly. I needed a good hit on the head, or something. I needed to make a decision. I couldn't continue doing this. This meant I needed to move out. Going back to mom and Stevie would be out of the question. Katy had to many connections to Noel and Liam. I had to go back to the states. It was my only way out of this mess.

Liam looked so perfect sleeping. I was about to shatter him. I took a deep breath and knelt down by the bedside. I gently kissed his face.

"Liam." I said as I gently shook him. He stirred softly. He slowly opened his eyes. He smiled at me. My heart broke seeing that beautiful smile.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" He groaned. He could tell I had been crying.

"You're not alright, love." I shook my head.

"I.....we need to break up Liam. I can't do this." Tears fell from my eyes. Liam blinked. Confusion fell over his face.

"Are you bloody kidding?" He asked. I shook my head as I started to sob.

"You can't do this to me? You made a fucking promise to me!" He yelled.

"I can't do this anymore." I mutter.

"I thought you were happy!" he croaked.

"I am happy. I just need to go away for awhile."

"We can go on a holiday. I have some cash saved up." He suggested.

"No, this is about me. I need to go back to the states for a little while." I had never seen Liam look so sad. I wanted to cry myself for a river, but I needed to be strong right now.

"Promise you will come back to me." he pleaded.

"I can't make you that promise, Liam. But, I promise I will come back soon. I just need to get away. I will always care about you, don't forgot that." I say as I run my hands through his hair. I bend down and kissed his forehead. I was doing everything I could not to cry a river.

"I love you." He said as he looked up at me with those sky blue eyes. I couldn't say it back, because to be honest I wasn't sure who I was in love with. It would break him even more if I didn't say it back.

"Me too, Liam." That was all I could say. I know I saw tears in his eyes as I laid down next to him. I let him wrap his arms around me. This would be my last night in this house for a while. I was going to make the most of it.

Peggy was surprised that I was leaving. She kept asking me to stay. Of coarse I refused. I thanked Peggy for being so good to me in past month. I told her I would come back to visit eventually. I actually had no idea when I would get up the nerve to come back here.

I had to tell Noel that I was leaving. This wouldn't be an easy task. I knocked on Noel and Liams bedroom door. Liam was gone for the afternoon. Probably playing footie or getting high, anything to use as an escape. Noel opened the door. He smiled when he saw me.

"Hey." He said. I rolled my eyes did he really have to play that card right now.

"I am going back to the states." I said abruptly.

"The fuck!" He exclaimed with a sour expression.

"I need to get away from you guys. I can't be in this love triangle." Noel looked sad.

"I can't make you stay, but if that is what you need to do." I sighed a sigh of relief. He was much more understanding the Liam. Last night Liam started to cry when he thought I was asleep. It was heartbreaking hearing the guy who acted so tough and hardhearted break down like that.