His Eyes, His Smile.

Part 11

A stream of light cascaded through the window and fell over my sleeping eyes. Groaning I turned over, cursing the light under my breath. My eyes wouldn't open all the way, begging to close and sleep some more, but I was still happy to see Cody laying next to me looking as cute as a kitten. His normally manly and sharp features looked so serene and loving, I couldn't help but smile.

My head was a bit groggy and I felt the beginnings of a hangover take on. None of it mattered though. After god knows how long I actually got to make love to the boy I had crushed on for so long, nearly half of my life. It was a crazy weird feeling like a dream and yet reality was trying to push through; what about James?

Just the thought of James made me cringe with sadness. He hurt me and although this wasn't really a planned revenge, why not hurt him? At the same time the last thing I wanted to do was hurt him. Sighing, I closed my eyes again trying to shake any thoughts out. Right now all that mattered was I was happy and in the arms of an amazing boy, the rest I would worry about later.

"Good morning beautiful." I felt a soft kiss on my forehead. Smiling as I opened my eyes to find Cody's directly above mine, I pulled his face closer and kissed him. I couldn't help but let out a sigh of contentment at how good I felt.

"Good morning." I yawed, making Cody give me a sleepy smile.

"What shall we have for breakfast my love?" Cody called as he walked out of the room and down the hallway.

"Anything!" I shouted back stretching my arms out across the bed.

Grabbing my phone, I noticed that there was a new message. Seeing that it was from James made me gasp.

The message read.

Hey babe. Sorry I haven't got a chance to talk to you much, dad says hi. Having a great time, miss you. Coming home tomorrow, can't wait.

xoxo

My head pulsed. Of all the nerve. How could he send me such a sweet message after what he has done to me. A tear rolled down my cheek and landed on my phone screen. I missed James but I was so mad at him and now my feelings for Cody were becoming strong too. My heart ached from being pulled in so many directions.

I read the last part of the message over again and the realization that James was coming home tomorrow set in. I guess he doesn't know I know about Ashleigh. But how do I tell him, or do I even tell him? Do I just leave him? I had no idea what to do and the fear of facing tomorrow made me more anxious than ever.

"Breakfast for two is ready."

Pulling on one of Cody's tees I tried to forget about the situation. My stomach grumbled from hunger and my body was pleading for some coffee.

"I made coffee and cinnamon pancakes, I hope you'll like them." Cody said sweetly holding a chair out for me.

My eyes widened at the wonderful set of hot cakes, whipping cream and strawberries at the side. The aroma of expresso coffee filled the air. I piled on a stack of three big pancakes onto my plate and doused them in syrup.

"Thank you so much Cody, this is wonderful." I mumbled through mouthfuls of what tasted like heaven, making my eyes roll back into my head.

"You're wonderful." His wit and charm surprised me. After what had happened long ago between us, I had him pegged out for heartless and unromantic but he kept pleading his case with every word. "Alice.. last night you said..well you said that you love me and I can't stop thinking about it." Cody eased, shyly.

Oh god did he really have to make things even more complicated. What had I gotten myself into. I had not a clue in the world how to respond. After everything Cody had done for me in the past two days I really did feel like I loved him. It was what I always wanted, to be with Cody, but why did it feel so wrong. Was it possible to be in love with two people? My desires and my better judgement were pulling me apart.

"Oh Cody.. you don't know how long I've waited for you to tell me first that you loved me. But finally now you say it and.."

"What is it Alice?" Cody alarmed, in a worried tone.

"It's just.. well I... I do love you.." When I said those words, sober, something in my heart smiled. "But James.." My voice trailed off.

How insane would I sound if I said I love him too? I didn't want to hurt Cody, after everything he's done and how long he's loved me.. but I couldn't lie. All of this didn't make any sense, my head was spinning. "I love James too." I said turning away so that I couldn't see his reaction.

"Oh..but-but he cheated on you and made you feel so bad, and you still love him after all that?!" Cody blurted.

"You have too." I shot back, unaware of the cold tone in my voice. "I'm just so confused right now Cody. Last night.. the past few days, have been exactly what I used to dream about and I didn't think of being with anybody but you. But James comes home tomorrow and I'm scared. I have no idea what to say or do okay." I managed to get out, feeling a familiar lump form in my throat and tears spring to my eyes.

"Oh Alice, don't worry. Don't say anything. I'm sorry, it's okay, it's going to be okay. Come here." Cody soothed, putting his arms around me and hugging me tight.

I buried my head in his chest and closed my eyes tight.

"I love you Alice, always will okay. No matter who you choose"

Hearing him say that made me start to cry even more. I couldn't help but look up and kiss him tenderly. Wiping a tear off my face he smiled down at me.

"Everything is going to be okay, I promise."

But even though he was so reassuring the pit of my stomach ached with fear of facing tomorrow.