Something inside of me snaps and I don't know anymore. Can't you see my heart is breaking? Can't you tell I can't hang on too much longer? Is it this hard to notice my heart shattering? The silent tears that flow endlessly from pitch black spheres. The quiet heartbreak that can be heard from miles away if you listen carefully. The shivers crawl down my back, stinging my nerves and electrifying my veins. The excruciating pain rises to my throat and I can't help but let the hate seep back through. You act like you don't care, and sometimes I wonder if that's an act at all. I wanted to thank you though. Brecause what happened between us? It made me do a lot of thinking. And what I realized was....I'm in love with you. I wanna be with you. But I'm afraid of all the talks, the looks. I know I can usually handle stuff like this but I'm so afraid of what people will say behind my back....But I just need to accept that....i love you and I need you....
You know, I'm not exactly good at putting myself out there because I'm never really sure how others would react because feelings like that scare me. I remember how I felt though, standing there, gazing at you hazel eyes glazed over with unshed tears. Innocence and remorse filled your warm eyes and a strangled smile fell from my face. Assuaging your fears, I walked away.
Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had merely held onto my tears, grasped the shattered pieces of my bruised heart. I knew you are broken too. I wanted to know why. I wanted to know you more than anything else in the world.
The nights following were long. A single candle created a tiny glow pulsating through the surrounding area. Stars danced gaily outside the window in my room, reminding me of what was.
The candle burned and the stars twinkled. The tears drying on my porcelain flesh were of absolution. So sick of crying and tired of wanting to die, I made up my mind. I knew I could run away from you, but something was preventing the notion from becoming more than that.
Someday I'll find out about your broken pieces, and I have a thought of consolation to keep me busy until then. Maybe, just maybr....Lights will guid you home, and ignite your bones. And when [if] that happens, I will try to fix you.
