Things Change

Chapter 7: It's an Option..?

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Maybe ._.

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Valerie's POV

So that's it. My only family that I have left, left me. The reason? Unknown. Yup. So here I am, in my restroom, crying my eyes balls out. It's been around three hours since he left and I'm just starting to realize he's not going back.

First things first. Cut. I decide its time to stop crying because well what's the point. I don't feel anything. I'm empty. Gone.

Jace was my rock. The only thing that was constant enough in my family, in my life. The only thing that kept me from cutting...is gone.

I go to my room and take out a little box from under my bed. In the box I have 4 blades, two knives and a couple of pocket knives. What can I say? I was an emotionless cutter. I take the box into the restroom.

I take my first blade in my right hand and slide it I cross my left wrists. I hope to feel something. Anything at all really.

Nothing.

I take it and slide it again.

And again.

And again...

I keep sliding it into my wrist is fully covered in blood. Then I feel the one thing I wish I wouldn't feel.

Guilt.

He left because I wasn't responsible. That's what he said. This right now is me being irresponsible. I really hope this is some kind of sick prank and tomorrow we can go back to normal. The cuts would heal and that would be that.

But there's that voice at the back if my heard that's just saying 'you know he's not coming back' and it's right. He's not. Not for a while.

I wipe the blood off by wrist and poor some alcohol over it. It burns but hey at least I feel something. I don't even grab my gym bag I just change into basketball shorts and sports bra and sprint to the gym which is only, I'd say 8 blocks from my house.

When I reach there 15 minutes later I run strait to the punching bag and go ham. I hit it for about 5 minutes but then realize that it's too quiet.

"Marshal!! The Final Episode! Followed by Led Zeppelin marathon!!" Marshal is the guy in charge of the music in the gym and I basically have him thinking I'm 'cute' so things come out the way I want.

"Coming up babe!" He yells back.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

If only he knew,

If only he knew,

If only he knew about the world without the bullshit and the lies,

We could've saved him.

They could've saved me.

But instead I'm here drowning in my own fucking mind,

And I'll be damned if you're the death of me.

Blood and ink stain the walls.