Mirrors | Malum

31

Calum

I wasn't able to spend the morning with Michael today and I wasn't really sure why that was. My parents told me I had more important matters to focus on rather than dealing with someone who is a delinquent but Michael is far from being one. He can be annoying at times, well everyday, but it's his nature to be. If I didn't have him clinging to my side all the time, then I'd most likely feel lost.

He told me he wanted to take me out on a platonic date; meaning that it'd be considered a friendly date and non-relationship connected at all. I didn't like that. I enjoyed the idea of him taking me out and making sure I was full of surprises. I loved how gentle he was with me; how he wouldn't take me to an ocean so we could go skinny dipping because he knows how self-conscious I am about my own body. He'd take me to a flower store, where he could put faux yellow sunflowers in my hair and make a crown out of it and he'd tell me I look beautiful. He'd say I remind him of something and I'd question him on it because I never really know what he's thinking.

But he's always thinking about me. And the thought of that makes me smile, because I'm always thinking about him as well.

I mean, it's obvious he's on my mind twenty four seven. I have a sketch book with seven drawings of him, all with different hair colors and outfits. He likes to experiment and he gets bored of things, while I love how often he changes. It's not because I dislike who he is; I love the person he is, it's more of the fact that whenever he changes something about him, it gives me another thing to love.

He promised he'd take me to a planetarium tonight, because he knows how much I love staring up at the stars and putting constellations together. I've named every star I've ever seen, and the first one I examined in the sky when I was with Michael was named after him. And it's my favorite star, because he's my favorite person. While Mali was at the beginning, Michael has found a way to change that.

"What do you mean I can't hang out with Michael?" I poured as my father looked down at me with bitter eyes. He's always been a gentle, loving person and now it seems as though he isn't. I hope he's not doing drugs.

"Son, it's nothing against you. Your mother and I just think he may be a bad influence."

I tried putting the pieces together inside of my head, but they just started spreading in different directions of swirls and nothing made sense. I could usually connect what somebody means easily, but this one didn't. It was like he was trying to push away the most amazing thing that's happened to me so far.

"How is he a bad influence?"

"Well, you haven't been focusing on your studies as much as you used to and you've been spending far too much time with this punk. I only say this because we love you more than anything and want to see you doing your best."

"He's helped me improve my confidence. Isn't that enough for you two?"

"What confidence, Calum? You act like we don't notice you aren't eating."

And at that exact moment, my heart dropped. I didn't realize it was that noticeable. I didn't think they could hear the sounds of the toilet flushing each time I'd toss away my food. I didn't think they could hear me puking most nights because my room is basically soundproof. Well not really, but I always have music blasting when I do. I didn't think they realized I was losing weight, when in reality, I've always considered myself as fat. I guess I'm just meant to be that way forever.

"I-"

"Don't. Joy and I talked about it and we think it'd be best if you get some help, which is why we are sending you to a mental hospital."