Fatal Error [Sequel to Falling For Mr.Parker]

Nine -

Tom's POV -

"So, we're here to discuss the problem which you have with alcohol and why you turned to alcohol in the first place." the counsellor spoke, taking out a piece of paper and a pen on which she was going to write notes about everything that I told her; although this wasn't going to take long.

There was a simple reason why I became totally dependant on alcohol and sex, and that's because the only person I ever loved broke my heart and there's no way I can be happy with anyone else other than her - she meant everything to me, and I was the one stupid enough to throw it all away in the first place.

"Lets speak about your life before the alcohol. Were you happy? Did you enjoy your life? Was there anything that made you angry or ever made you feel like you didn't want to be here anymore?" she asked, the last question making it sound like I had tried to kill myself or something like that when, all I was really suffering from, was sadness and a brokenheart.

"I loved my life. In fact, I know people say it all the time, but I really did have the perfect life. I had an amazing girlfriend who I loved more than anything, a job which was my entire life and friends who were always there for me. I would never have changed my life for anything." I replied, looking over at her to see her jotting something down on the piece of paper in front of her.

"And what changed then?"

"I found out my girlfriend was pregnant, left her and was arrested all on the same day..." I answered in a manner that made it sound like it was the most normal thing in the world to do when, in actual fact, there was a lot more to it than that and it wasn't as simple as I had made it sound.

"Arrested?" the counsellor asked in complete confusion.

"Yeah. My girlfriend was a student, and I was her teacher. I was arrested and sent to prison, when I was released I discovered that I had a beautiful daughter and that she had moved on with her best friend from school." I sighed.

Even now, the thought of Nathan having everything that I wanted made me seriously jealous, knowing there was nothing I could do about it and Rachel was probably never going to be mine again - Nathan would be an idiot not to forgive her and take her back; it's not like I was going to do anything that ruined their relationship.

I loved her, but I also wanted her to be happy and I was never going to make her happy again. I would probably just end up breaking her heart even more and making her hate me more than she already does - I'm just glad that she's decided she's going to talk to me again and she isn't going to ignore me.

Even though, after the way I acted, it's the least that I deserve.

"And is the reason you turned to drinking?"

"I guess so. I thought that, if I was drunk and sleeping with other girls all the time, then it would take away the pain of not being able to be with the only person I ever loved and the only person who ever made me happy. I just wanted something that made me happy and was never going to leave me; I guess alcohol seemed like a good answer at the time." I replied, looking away from my counsellor as I finally realised how much of an idiot I had been and how stupid I was to actually think that it was going to work and I was going to get over Rachel by being the way that I was.

Rachel was the reason I acted in the manner that I did, and if I ever told her that, then it would make her feel so much worse than she already does; and I'm not going to be that cruel to her, that just wouldn't be fair.

"Do you still love her?"

"Sorry?"

"Is the question too difficult for you to understand?" she asked me sarcastically.

"Yes. I do still love her, but I'm not going to take her happiness away just to make myself happy. All this time, I've been nothing other than selfish." I said with tears in my eyes, but I just blinked them away because I wasn't going to let some stranger see my cry.

I had already opened up to her about how I felt and why, and I believe we had also found the reason I turned to alcohol in the first place - but it was her job and, if I didn't tell her, then she would just report that I'm not making any progress and all this other crap that have to report back to the hospital about me.

"Then you need to move on. If you keep trying to win her back, you're only going to push her away and then she'll never want to see you again. If you can't be her boyfriend, then be her best friend and be there when she needs you. In the future, she will thank you for it." the counsellor smiled slightly at me as she stopped making notes on me and was actually giving her proper attention to me; almost like she was giving me words from the bottom of her heart, like she had been through this before and had learnt from her mistakes. "I learnt that one the hard way after I lost the father of my son, because I pushed him too far and he had enough of me; I haven't seen him in more than three years now. Is that what you want to happen?"

"No. I've missed too much of my daughter's life because I've pushed her away. I just want her in my life." I sighed.

"Then be nothing more than a good friend to her and an amazing father to your daughter. It will mean a lot to her and, if you're there when she needs you most, then at least she'll know not everything was a lie." she spoke, and I could feel my phone vibrating in my pocket, I pulled it out quickly to see that the caller ID on the front was Rachel and I wondered what the hell she could want; she knew that I was here and she must have known I was going to be too busy to talk to her.

"Erm, yeah, time that I changed, err, there for my daughter." I replied, getting distracted once more as my phone vibrated in my hand, still showing up that it was Rachel and, for her to be ringing me, then she must really be desperate.

"Tom, are you really listening to what I'm saying to you?"

"Look, I already know that if I don't change then I'm going to die. You're telling me to just be a best friend to someone who hates me more than anything because of the way I treated her. And I've got a daughter that thinks I've abandoned her because I decided I wanted nothing to do with her. Can you really help someone as screwed-up as I am?" I asked her, wanting nothing more than an honest answer from her; I was almost certain that there was no helping someone like myself and I was going to have to accept everything life threw at me from now on.

"There's only so much I can-"

"I'm sorry, I really have to answer this." I interrupted her as, after four attempts at ringing me, I decided it must warrant as important and there must be something seriously wrong for her to phone me and not anyone else. "Hello."

"T-t-t-tom?" Rachel said through the tears.

"What is it Rachel? What's happened?" I asked her.

"H-h-help me p-p-please." she replied, and I could hear the fear in her voice as she spoke to me, and I knew that something was wrong because she would never have been this upset over something that happened between her and Nathan; and she almost certainly wouldn't have phoned me when she's got a key to my flat should she require it.

"I'm sorry. Same time next week. I'll see you." I said, grabbing my jacket from the chair and pretty much running out of the room in order to get to my car so that I could find out what the hell was going on; I was seriously worried now and panicking more than anything. "Where are you?"

"I-I-I-"

"Look, we have your daughter and your girlfriend. If you love them both then you'll be at the park in twenty minutes. Alone." a voice spoke.

"What have you done with my daughter?" I asked angrily.

Who the hell would take my daughter and Rachel? What had either of them done to be treated like this?

Steph was only four, she was too young to have done anything to hurt someone. And Rachel had been living her life with Nathan while she looked after Steph, so she didn't have the time to do anything wrong.

"You will receive further instructions at the park. You now have seventeen minutes remaining." the voice spoke once again before he hung up the phone and left me wondering what the hell was happening.

But, there was one thing I knew for sure.

I was going to make whoever took my baby and Rachel pay and I was going to make sure they never did the same thing to anyone else again.