From the Day I Died

Chapter 5

“School dance is coming up soon,” I said to Jordy, who was munching on a lettuce, tomato, onion and salami sandwich. He finished chewing, as all polite gentlemen do.

“Yeah, what of it?” he asked. It wasn’t a rude sentence, that was just how he was. Suspicious of people and their motives.

“Well, you going to ask anyone?” I hinted. I had my legs stretched out in front of me, tanning in the sun. Of course, if I wanted a tan, all I had to do was take off the bracelet….

“Ha ha. No,” he said shortly. I rolled my eyes.

“Come ON Jordy, there’s got to be one girl that tickles your fancy!” I stated. He thought for a moment, then looked down with a sly smile.

“Well, Charlotte hasn’t got a date yet….”he blushed. I nudged him, uttering a small 'you sly dog' as I did so.

“She’s really pretty,” I prompted. And she was. Tall, slender with beautiful blonde hair and bright blue eyes. I had no idea why she didn't have a date yet, guess the guys in this day of age need to grow a pair.

“Yeah, she is, which is why I’m not asking her,” he said, acting like the conversation was over. Which it wasn’t.

“Well why not?” I huffed, and crossed my arms.

“She’ll crush me to a pulp,” he snorted, and took a bite of his sandwich. It had been over a week since I’d started talking to him, and he never questioned why I didn’t eat. Heck, I never questioned why we never ate.

“No she won’t, a spunky guy like you? Come on! What have you got to loose!” I said excitedly, hoping to motivate him. The siren rang, its loud wail piercing our conversation. Jordy got up.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” He rolled his eyes.

“Seriously man, think about it!!” I yelled, and darted around the corner. I twisted the jewel back to it’s normal position and hurried after him. Jordy looked back, but saw nothing. He went to his bag, and got out his Maths books. He had maths with Charlotte, this should be interesting. He walked briskly to the N block, just in time to see his teacher open the door. He darted in and took a seat behind the girl we had mentioned before.

“Turn to page 394,” the teacher said. This chick was a massive looser. She thought she was funny, but she was just lame. She tried to make everyone believe she was nice, but then gave out detentions like it was going out of fashion. She excused herself, and left the class while they started on questions. Jordy puffed up his chest, and tapped Charlotte on the shoulder. He was going to do it!!!

“Yes?” Charlotte asked, and batted her long lashes. Jordy took a deep breath, and said,

“Can I borrow your ruler?” Face. Palm. She said he could, and gave him a pink flip out one.

“Jordy you chicken!! Do it! Do it now!!” He screamed inside of his head. He puffed up his chest like a bird, which I found cute, and tried again.

“Charlotte, would you like to go to the school dance with me?” he said without a pause. It was so fast I was afraid she didn’t hear it. She blinked twice then smiled.

“Of course not,” she laughed. Her friends had caught wind of this, and were snickering behind their books. Jordy’s smile vanished. Then the brute next to her turned around. Zack.

“You asked, MY girl, to the dance?” he snorted. Jordy shrank significantly in size.

“I had no idea-“ he began, but was soon silenced by a large swing of Zack’s fist, which connected with his jaw, sending Jordy flying off of his chair. The class roared with laughter. Jordy picked up his books, and ran. He ran out of the door, nearly knocking the teacher over as she was walking into class, and ran out the hall, to his bag, dumped his stuff in there, and walked home. Tears were streaming down his face. I rushed to keep up with him, and tried desperately to convey happy thoughts into his head. Lucie had shown me how to, but it seemed to have no effect. He was still dying inside. He unlocked the door, and ran to his room. His mother wasn’t home. She was on a night shift. It was 2:30. She wouldn’t be back until the next morning. Jordy threw himself onto the bed, and you could see he was trying to contain himself. It took him three hours until he was calm, then he just lay there. He wasn’t eating. Food makes people feel better, right? So, I quickly dashed downstairs, and took off the bracelet. I dialled up a pizza place, and ordered him a pepperoni, his favourite. I flicked on the bracelet, and up the stairs I went.

***

Pizza helped. He ate the whole thing, then went to the fridge for ice-cream. He never even questioned where the pizza came from, just assumed his mum ordered it.

God it’s like he’s going through a break up! He ate the whole bloody tub! He showered, while I sat outside, and went to bed at 10. Earlier than usual. This concerned me. But what really set off alarm bells was that he wasn’t going to sleep. He sat upright. Not moving, just looking at his hands. Lights on. Then he rolled up his long sleeved jumper.

Up until now, I never realised he had always worn a jumper, even to bed. He wore a jumper to school, in sport, chilling, never daring to take it off, even in the hotter winter months. Now I saw it, I saw it all. Scars, some long, some short, some thick, some thin, lined his wrist. Red scars. Each with their own story to tell. I was shocked, to say the least. I never once, not in the four weeks that I’d watched him, seen him put a knife to his wrist. He must have done it while I was training….

He leaned over to his bed side desk, and got out a small pocket knife. He pressed the blade onto his skin, and let a small droplet of blood fall from his wrist onto his jumper. He then dragged the knife across, leaving the largest scar of them all.

“Why isn’t it working? It isn’t enough this time…..” Jordy thought. He got up, blood drooling down into his palm, and got out a piece of paper. He got a pen, face set in an emotionless mask, and wrote on his desk.

I’m sorry mum. I know, that without dad around, it’s been hard to raise me. I know you think I do drugs, and that’s why I’m always in my room. It isn’t. The truth is, I have nobody except you. The only friend I have is some girl who is just like me. She’ll understand….

Anyway, I am sorry, but this is the only way.

His brow was furrowed; no tears fell down his face. He was angry. Not sad. He was just plain angry. He stood, and got the knife.

“Don’t!” I cried, “Don’t do it Jordy!” He felt my words, and grimaced a bit, then raised the knife. The light reflected off of the cool metal, that dripped blood from the previous wound. He gripped the knife, so tightly that his knuckles were white. He was going to do it!

That was the last thought I had. I ripped off the bracelet, just as the knife came down. I lunged forward, and grabbed for the knife.

Jordy stood still, a look of utter shock of his face. He dropped the knife, but it did not fall. I was imbedded in my hand. I cried out in pain and shock, and ran furiously around the room, trying to shake it off. The object fell to the ground with a soft thud, and a lighter red stained the metal.

“T-Taylah?” he asked bewildered. I shifted my attention from the blood that was flowing out of the deep wound. Crap. I looked in the mirror. White wings shimmered. He saw it all.

“I-er….um…this is allllll a dream!” I said and waved my hands in front of him. He was as white as a ghost.

“No. It’s not…..” He muttered, and looked at the scar on his arm.

“I felt pain, this is all real,” I was scared. I had just broken the number one rule of Guardianship! Jordy reached out and gently took my hand. He then took me downstairs to where he kept the first aid. He took me to the tap, and washed away the blood. He then went to put a bandaid on it.

“Gonna need a bigger band aid,” I chuckled and got out the large wrap. He stared at me the whole time whilst I wrapped my hand tightly. He then stroked my wing, causing me to jump back.

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered, and scuffed his feet on the tiles. I smiled. The cut was healing fast, the gauze not even damp with blood. That's what I like about this job, free healthcare.

“You’re taking this in surprisingly well,” I said. He went and sat down on the couch.

“Thank you?” he said, unsure of the compliment. I took a seat next to him. He had his hands in his lap, his brow furrowed. He looked…..so sad, so…so vulnerable. I hadn't seen him like this before, and it made me hurt.

“Maybe when she leaves, I can try again…..” He thoughts.

“Oh no you don’t,” I said, and pulled him into a tight hug. He slipped his arms around my waist, and we just sat there, as the time clicked by.