Saved -{ FRERARD }- **SEQUEL to ABANDONED**

34

He stared at me.

His eyes were wide.

He was surprised but didn't speak.

The silence from him made it obvious he wasn't up for marriage....but his face somewhat showed that he didn't quite understand what was happening.

"Wow - um....I don't want you to get the wrong idea, Gerard. I love you but this is a really big step...I don't know if I'm ready for this. I want you. I need you in my life, Gee, but I'm just not ready..."

I closed the box and put it back in my pocket.

"I'm sorry - I know that's not what you wanted -"

"Baby, no. It's understandable. I'm not upset."

"Did you want to get married?"

"Honestly, no one has ever made me feel like how I feel with you. And I want to spend the rest of my life feeling this way and knowing that it's you that makes me feel that way."

"I'll do it if you want to."

"No. Frank, don't do this for me. You said you're not ready. I don't want to rush you. I want to marry you but if you need to think about it, do it. I really don't mind waiting for you. I would wait to the end of the world for you."

"I just don't want you to do that when you could be happy with someone who can make up their mind."

"You just need some time to think, that's all. Everything's been happening so fast between us. I think we can wait on getting married until you feel comfortable."

"But -"

"I'm don't want to be happy with someone else, Frank. Why are you suggesting that?" I stared at him. He looked away. "Frank," I gripped his chin lightly, making him look at me, "are you not happy?"

"No! I am but I don't want you not to be."

"Baby, as long as I have you I'm happy."

***

"He didn't say "yes"?" Mikey said through the phone.

"No, he didn't."

"But we all thought he would. Why didn't he?"

"He's just not ready for it. I should've known he wasn't...there's just so much going on and I asked him at such a weird time...it's fine. Nothing's awkward between us." I laughed, "At least he didn't say "no", right?"

"Gerard, you don't have to hide how you really feel.."

"How I really feel? Mikey, this is the love of my life! All he needs is a little time. He's never been in love before."

"I know, but I'm saying -"

"And I'm saying I'll wait until he feels ready."

"Alright. I have to go. Bye, Gee."

I stayed on the couch and sighed.

Mikey didn't quite understand how I have to be now. Patience is the key with Frank. If you have no patience, you'll get pissed off teaching him everything he should already know, he'll get upset and hide, and you two won't speak for hours. Frank is still learning and the more you teach him, the more he opens up. He likes doing things on his own sometimes, but other times he needs help. Mikey just never really realized that about Frank.

"Baby?" I heard him call from the bedroom.

I put the phone down on the coffee table and went to the bedroom. "Hey, I'm here, sweetheart." I said as I sat next to him.

He buried his face in my hip, seeing as how he was laying down on the bed. "Come to bed, Gerard, please?"

I ended up laying next to him on his side of the bed and we both fell asleep.

***

It's been a few days since the rejected proposal and nothing has changed with how we interact with each other.

We were on the couch lounging around, making fun of whatever was on the TV. We went back and forth with jokes until it hurt laugh but we kept going to tears until the show ended and we calmed down.

Honestly, seeing him smile and laugh like that - I wish I had my camera.

Speaking of which -

"Frank - wait! I forgot to show you something!" I ran to the bedroom, to my side, and pulled out a small stack of Polaroid pictures from the drawer on my nightstand and went back to the living room.

"What are those?"

I handed them to him and he looked at them.

"They're all of me...?" He kept flipping through them until he finished. "When did you take these?"

"Oh, it was a long while ago. But when I was cleaning the house, I came across them again." I took the pictures back and looked through them for the hundredth time. "You look so beautiful in them."

"Gerard?" He spoke after a few minutes of silence, "Do you love me?"

I looked over at him, quite shocked at this question. "Of course I do, little one."

"Why?"

I was quiet.

"Why?" I repeated in my head.

I scooted closer to him, wrapping my arms around him and holding him protectively. "You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, Frank. You are that one thing that makes me lose my focus. You are always in my head, I can't forget you and would never try. You are the love of my life. You are the only one I want. You are everything I've ever wanted."

"Everything?"

"Everything. I love you. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you."

Frank leaned up, kissing my lips and grabbing my shirt to pull me closer. I laughed a little into the kiss. When he pulled away, his eyes fluttered open, his grip on me grew a little tighter.

"I want to be with you, Gerard. I swear I do...but I'm still -"

"Shh," I leaned down, kissing him again. "When you're ready. We'll get there."