Lost in Love (Formerly known as We Can't)

Stepping Back

     "Finn," I said, "this is Kalista Solah, your date." Kalista smiled to reveal perfectly straight white teeth.
     "Hi," Finn began to blush, "are you ready?" Kalista nodded. My plan was working. Finn was moving on.
    I watched as Finn and Kalista walk out the door sharing a smile and holding hands. "I did it," I thought to myself. Finn was officially someone else's. I walked back to the large room I shared with Keira whom was peacefully sleeping.
     I walked over to my bed and opened up a holobook called Paper Planets. As I got closer to the end I began to get bored and wanted Keira to awaken so we could go do something.
After reaching the final page, I closed the book and glanced out the window. I started at the bright, white, fluffy clouds than followed my eyes down to the ground. Because I was only a few floors off the ground I had no trouble recognizing faces. Out of the corner of my left eye, I recognized Kalista's long ombré hair being flipped in a very flirty fashion. I noticed a dark hand on her skinny waist and her sun kissed arms around a black teeshirt. Was this what it looked like. I began to study there every motion, until I confirmed what I thought. Finn, the first person to care about me, was making out with another girl on the first date.
     "I set them up, I set them up," I kept reminding myself. I walked over to the front door after hearing a knock.
"Finn! Kalista!" I said faking excitement, "what are you doing here?" I continued with a haft hearted smile.
"Well I told Kalista about Keira and now she really wants to meet her," Finn said rubbing Kalista's skinny waist.
"Great!" I said lying with an exaggerated smile, "Keira is sleeping right now but you can come back later."
"No, it's fine," Kalista said, "I don't mind. Babies are the cutest when sleeping."
"Well, um, ok. Her room is that way." I pointed. I saw Kalista start walking back and Finn following close behind.
    "Hey thanks for setting us up," Finn smiled, "I've never been more in love."
   "No problem," I said, "that's what friends are for."  What did he mean he had never been more in love? I mean sure Kalista was beautiful with her prefect waist and breast, tiny butt, long ombré hair and teal blue eyes. She also had perfect skin, no freckles, or acne. Unlike me. I still had my pregnancy weight, i hated my breast, and Finn clearly did too. My face was covered in freckles and scars from my time on Jakku. I was ugly compared to her.
    I started to hope my dad would come home soon. If he was here, than they weren't, and I could have dad watch Keira while I went to the club. Luckily I'd been trained in a force power which I forgot the name of that gave me the ability to drink inhuman amounts but stay sober. I would be using that tonight.
      "We've got to go," Finn told me walking towards the door, "thanks again." I nodded and held back the tears as Finn and Kalista held hands and made flirty comments to each other. That used to be me. Had I made a mistake?
     I walked back to Keira's room as the young infant began to stir. I picked her up and cradled her in my arms. "Mommy will always be here for you," I whispered stroking her hair, "only if your here for me." I knew she couldn't under what I just said, and that nod like motion she did, well that was nothing. But it felt good to think that one day if Finn marries Kalista and they move to another planet, Keira will still be there. I guess that's all that really matters right? Wrong. I know Finn and I are meant to be. I know I made a mistake setting him up, and I would risk leaving the Jedi for him.

------------------------------------------sorry for the short chapter. I just wanted to get something up.